Zero Punctuation: Age of Conan
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
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Wow I feel the hate for MMORPGS. I guess it only appeals to the PC master race and not you peasant console gamers, mwahaha!Entharion said:Shame on you! wasting your reviewer integrity on reviewing MMO's!
Neh what I'm trying to say is... GO review some real games.. like Wii fit. cause you're fat
imagine that - millions of sweating stay-at-home doughboys reading the end credits wrong and doing their MMORPG homework with THEIR clothes off, not their avatar's.
or you could always go watch Chuck Palahniuk's CHOKE movie trailer [http://mikephilbin.blogspot.com/2008/07/choke-movie-trailer.html] which looks way sexier than an armour-shy bronzed avatar with her boobs chopped off.
or you could always go watch Chuck Palahniuk's CHOKE movie trailer [http://mikephilbin.blogspot.com/2008/07/choke-movie-trailer.html] which looks way sexier than an armour-shy bronzed avatar with her boobs chopped off.
That's... bizarre logic. It's an inferior game because under-18s play it? (And I question your analysis of demographics as well.)A-D. said:
And it's not really that WoW is the greatest MMORPG of all time, who knows, it's that being the most popular MMORPG out there by several orders of magnitude means that it's undeniably going to have an influence on other MMORPGs. Put out a muhmorpuhger, especially one in the heroic fantasy genre, and you will inevitably be judged in comparison to World of Warcraft, even to say "hey, this is really quite different." Which Yahtzee doesn't think is the case, apparently.
@A-D. : Remember in the Brawl review he mentioned fanboys? Watch that review again. You fit the description perfectly.
As to the review itself.. I liked it. It mirrored my own thoughts fairly well (and yes, I also noticed that you can get pretty damn far without using any kind of armor).
As to the review itself.. I liked it. It mirrored my own thoughts fairly well (and yes, I also noticed that you can get pretty damn far without using any kind of armor).
@A-D:
Please tell me one MMO which is
1) Not a huge grindfest
2) Immerses you into the world
3) Allows you to roleplay
...
...
None? Thought so since all MMOs are alike and the obvious grinding kills any even very subtle attempt to immerse into the world. It's also very immersive if you hit the "Pay Shop Only you moron!" line every other step and immersion also goes down the drain if you know exactly that 99% of the players around you are pants-wetting, non-mature, nose-picking wanna-be-gamers that just are good because they slam all their pocket-money into PayShop to get the cheap items with which they can own any experience and skilled player who plays "fair and sqaure".
No. MMOs NEVER are going to be anything worth the time of pro gamers ( with taste and skill ) unless the companies really start to think this entire game type over.
Please tell me one MMO which is
1) Not a huge grindfest
2) Immerses you into the world
3) Allows you to roleplay
...
...
None? Thought so since all MMOs are alike and the obvious grinding kills any even very subtle attempt to immerse into the world. It's also very immersive if you hit the "Pay Shop Only you moron!" line every other step and immersion also goes down the drain if you know exactly that 99% of the players around you are pants-wetting, non-mature, nose-picking wanna-be-gamers that just are good because they slam all their pocket-money into PayShop to get the cheap items with which they can own any experience and skilled player who plays "fair and sqaure".
No. MMOs NEVER are going to be anything worth the time of pro gamers ( with taste and skill ) unless the companies really start to think this entire game type over.
I would argue that saying that "pro" gamers "with taste and skill" shun an entire genre is a breed of fanboyism in itself. Trying to get into a maturity contest over what video games one plays is rather stupid.
While I agree that Age of Conan is mostly a clone of World of Warcraft, you picked one of the two classes that showcases it the most. The two real mage classes (Demonologist and Necromancer) are pretty much copy+pasted from other MMOs. As such, of course armor is fairly useless. Additionally, all of their survivability comes from two spells: one that buffs your defense, and one that provides an absolute reduction to damage taken. Those help your character more than a cloth sports bra ever could.
However, I believe you would feel differently about the game if you had played any of the melee classes. Not enough to like/love the game by any stretch of the imagination, but at least give it a slightly lesser reading on the WoWness-scale. While Funcom has touted their innovative combat system, the userbase has determined that this was supposed to be "slightly different [melee] combat system". With that in mind, playing Age of Conan and not trying their combo system is like buying a ticket to a bad movie, buying some stale popcorn, and leaving the theatre before the previews are over. The experience is just as bad, but it's for the wrong reasons.
However, I believe you would feel differently about the game if you had played any of the melee classes. Not enough to like/love the game by any stretch of the imagination, but at least give it a slightly lesser reading on the WoWness-scale. While Funcom has touted their innovative combat system, the userbase has determined that this was supposed to be "slightly different [melee] combat system". With that in mind, playing Age of Conan and not trying their combo system is like buying a ticket to a bad movie, buying some stale popcorn, and leaving the theatre before the previews are over. The experience is just as bad, but it's for the wrong reasons.
Firstly, let me just deal with the obligatory yaying or naying by saying (heh, that rhymes. Sorry where was I) by saying yay.
I always enjoy Yahtzee's reviews as there seem to be precious few people out there that respect the value of decent narrative in games, and fewer still people who feel this way with a voice.
But let's get of the soapbox and talk about the game; that's right I'm in a forum and I'm getting off of a soapbox, this must be how Mandela felt.
Of course I haven't played AoC, but I have played WoW in the past and that was enough to put me off MMORPGs for life. I was playing as one of those wizard things that can suck souls and summon demons and I had been playing for about a month. I had just got the courage up to take my meagre wizard type thing out of the safe area and go exploring where more dangerous quests resided. On my travel I came upon another wizard type thing who was at a similar level to myself and seemed to be outnumbered. Throwing myself into the fray I summoned a creature who evened the odds and soon we were standing victorious. My colleague responded by addressing me in a language that looked like English with all the vowels removed, to ask if I wanted to team up.
To cut a long story short, two minutes later he got us in a fight with a group of enemies who were all individually strong enough to beat one of us to death with the corpse of the other, and the icing on the cake was when he buggered off and left me to die, shouting "NOOOOB!!!" as he left. (I needed a friend to tell me what a noob was).
Alarm bells started ringing at this point, after it happened a couple more times I decided that MMORPGs are the domain for those people who argue about whether Star Wars has been ruined and who of Microsoft or Sony is better.
MMORPGs are a good idea on paper, but society just isn't ready for them.
I always enjoy Yahtzee's reviews as there seem to be precious few people out there that respect the value of decent narrative in games, and fewer still people who feel this way with a voice.
But let's get of the soapbox and talk about the game; that's right I'm in a forum and I'm getting off of a soapbox, this must be how Mandela felt.
Of course I haven't played AoC, but I have played WoW in the past and that was enough to put me off MMORPGs for life. I was playing as one of those wizard things that can suck souls and summon demons and I had been playing for about a month. I had just got the courage up to take my meagre wizard type thing out of the safe area and go exploring where more dangerous quests resided. On my travel I came upon another wizard type thing who was at a similar level to myself and seemed to be outnumbered. Throwing myself into the fray I summoned a creature who evened the odds and soon we were standing victorious. My colleague responded by addressing me in a language that looked like English with all the vowels removed, to ask if I wanted to team up.
To cut a long story short, two minutes later he got us in a fight with a group of enemies who were all individually strong enough to beat one of us to death with the corpse of the other, and the icing on the cake was when he buggered off and left me to die, shouting "NOOOOB!!!" as he left. (I needed a friend to tell me what a noob was).
Alarm bells started ringing at this point, after it happened a couple more times I decided that MMORPGs are the domain for those people who argue about whether Star Wars has been ruined and who of Microsoft or Sony is better.
MMORPGs are a good idea on paper, but society just isn't ready for them.
After 4 hours of fumbling through equip menus I gave up with AoC. I appreciate the effort, but monkeys in people suits cannot write video games, and anything that dialog heavy is bound to topple over under the weight of it's own bullshit.
Never got into the WoWc sub-CULT-ure. Most of the cats I know that play them turn into unfeeling lumps after a few days. Their little beady eyes secretly checking out my "equipment menu.," while I tell them to get some sun and un-equip their ***** materia.
Never got into the WoWc sub-CULT-ure. Most of the cats I know that play them turn into unfeeling lumps after a few days. Their little beady eyes secretly checking out my "equipment menu.," while I tell them to get some sun and un-equip their ***** materia.
Sigh, please get this thing loaded on another server. Every wednsday I have to load this thing multiple times. It sucks to start watching the video only to have it time out after 30 sec to one minute because the server is overloaded...
Youtube?
Something, either get a better server, or get some partners who want to host the file.
Youtube?
Something, either get a better server, or get some partners who want to host the file.
Very Funny review. Thanks Yahtzee.
Though I fail to see all the MMORPG hate here in this forum, WoW is good. Everybody says you need to "Grind" the same thing, over and over again. Thats the really stupid way of leveling. Quests are the best way to go. Yes I know, the quests are nearly the same, being kill x amount of y. I do agree that it does become repetitive (Which I guess you would call a "grind") but its all about getting to the max level. You see half of the game before 70, and the other half when you hit it.
To some, that seems like absolute crap, to me, it actually rewards you for going the whole 9 yards. (Well you also need a couple of friends, but hey, if you play your class well, you might actually find a group and start to like the game.)
I think why WoW is so successful is the fact that you don't need a friend to level to 70, you can get to 70 without a single bit of aid from a friend. In AoC (So I've heard from people who play it, correct me if I'm wrong) but you need a couple of friends just to get past level 20... WTF?! What if none of my friends are on? Am I just STUCK here until one comes along? Yea... not gonna play that game.
Though I fail to see all the MMORPG hate here in this forum, WoW is good. Everybody says you need to "Grind" the same thing, over and over again. Thats the really stupid way of leveling. Quests are the best way to go. Yes I know, the quests are nearly the same, being kill x amount of y. I do agree that it does become repetitive (Which I guess you would call a "grind") but its all about getting to the max level. You see half of the game before 70, and the other half when you hit it.
To some, that seems like absolute crap, to me, it actually rewards you for going the whole 9 yards. (Well you also need a couple of friends, but hey, if you play your class well, you might actually find a group and start to like the game.)
I think why WoW is so successful is the fact that you don't need a friend to level to 70, you can get to 70 without a single bit of aid from a friend. In AoC (So I've heard from people who play it, correct me if I'm wrong) but you need a couple of friends just to get past level 20... WTF?! What if none of my friends are on? Am I just STUCK here until one comes along? Yea... not gonna play that game.
Or with too many devs who refused to fix reported issues in a frantic attempt to make release...
srsly, don't blame the testers. Anything you complain about has, in fact, been reported a zillion times. Devs, however, are too busy being cooler than the rest of us to actually play a game, and understand what makes fun.
Also, there are reasons why I play on a European rp server. The people actually manage not to be useless tardbabies, reasonably often.
And he so shoulda played a demonologist, or a Herald of Xotli. This review could have stood some full lovecraftian squid transforms.
And he so shoulda played a demonologist, or a Herald of Xotli. This review could have stood some full lovecraftian squid transforms.
AoC was about as fun as most MMO's can be, that is to say, I enjoyed it for a short while, but the fun quickly began to wear away when the things that set it apart from MMO's began to fade into the background and it became as tedious as WoW usually is, I figured at the point where it all began feeling the same I might as well go play the game I'm already level-capped on.
I liked the battle system for awhile, but my particular class was the equivalent of a razor sharp death napkin, which meant that I was likely to die about 5-10 seconds into any given fight, making the combos just longer than my usual life expectancy.
Meh.
I liked the battle system for awhile, but my particular class was the equivalent of a razor sharp death napkin, which meant that I was likely to die about 5-10 seconds into any given fight, making the combos just longer than my usual life expectancy.
Meh.
Oh my god, I actually didn't laugh at all at this one, probably because it turned into another hammering of World of Warcraft towards the end (and therefore bashing MMOs in general).
One thing that made me smile though was the Mega-Imp. There has to be a T-shirt of this guy.
One thing that made me smile though was the Mega-Imp. There has to be a T-shirt of this guy.