Zero Punctuation: Final Fantasy XIII

[Seneschal]

There seems to be a couple of large valleys separating Final Fantasy fans. There's the 1-6 crowd, the 7-10 crowd, and the 11-13 crowd. None of these people can seem to really agree on whats a good FF game. I want more of the 7-10 stuff, most people want more of the 1-6 stuff, and several people seem to want alot more of the 12 or 13 type stuff. (Yes, those are factual statistics )

I...haven't really been playing 13 lately because admitedly I've been enjoying Torchlight and Ninja Gaiden Sigma alot more. I love Final Fantasy and the battle system in this one is pretty cool. It's really just the same thing as mashing attack(since you don't have to select magic) but it is fun. I loved the pretty environments but I have to say I do miss the towns and the airships and all that. Yes, I know that when you get to chapter 11 you can run around, but still, it's just not the same.

That being said, the Video was hilarious! This one was funnier then several of the ones before it, I especially loved the end cartoon with Vanille. I agree that the character's footsteps are really loud...but for some reason, I like that sound. So for me, that wasn't too bad, lol.

To be fair, the 7-10 crowd also has FF9 fans, and 9 was a direct throwback to the earlier games like 6. It was fantasy, it was pretty, it had campy villains, a world-shattering plot, an ragtag group of, thank God, NON-ANGSTY adventurers with actually decent character design, a simple and quick game mechanic... And most importantly, it had that magic. There was imagination and childlike awe involved in making it, and it shows.

Now, I played through all the other ones, but none of them were as fantastic. Designed-by-committee crap.

Another thing I know 9 did well is start off well, with a dramatic set piece, a theater play in a palace as a distraction for the kidnapping of a princess. Y'know, an intriguing and interesting development? If the designers are incapable of ever doing something like that again, then Yahtzee is within his right to call bullshit when game fails to impress him early on.

 

[mexicola]

Nice work, a lot funnier then some recent ones so thumbs up from me.

 

[f0re1gn]

I wonder if Ben's gonna read all of this.

But I hope he reads my message because I really have to say that you shouldn't include mute moments in your reviews. Those break the flow and the review seems crippled.

 

[noin007]

I've been a Final Fantasy fan since 1. though I REALLY got into the series with VII. I admit, this game is the reason I bought a PS3. Then, a few years later it finally came out and all I can say is I've never been so utterly disappointed in a game.

The characters are bland at best, the story is... I'm not sure if the story itself is any good because 35ish hours into it I'm still not sure what's going on. I refuse to read the in-game book they give you and have decided to rely on what story they actually show you... which is almost none.

The combat is pathetically bad. At one point I was fighting 5 very fast attacking enemies and there was action going on all over the screen, health bars were going crazy, damage numbers were flying all over the place... it was an amazing sight to see... though the same problem the entire game has, I had almost nothing to do with what was going on. Everything other than Lightning was under it's own control, doing it's own thing, and all I had to do on Lightning was hit auto ability.

Honestly, I never thought I'd play a game that would make me wish for Final Fantasy 12's combat. Even that god awful crap was better than 13. The only things I've ever played with a Final Fantasy logo on it that were worse were Final Fantasy 2 and Dirge of Cerberus... *shiver*

 

[Cannorn]

I really want to love this game but the thing I love about RPG's tend to be the exploration adding re-playability (did I miss anything, does the story change if I do things differently ala Star Ocean) and play time.
Oh and also being in freaking control of the game not watching it play itself!
Sounds like this will be a fail
Such a shame that games are now going for looks rather than substance...much like the target audience I suppose.

 

[Legend of J]

I agree with yahtzee on this about the corridors my brother got it the day it came out and everytime ive seen him play it is either someone taking an emo fit OR them walking down a 1 way route to reach the goal. However the past few times ive seen him on it he seems to be on a big open field and spends most of his time running from a large turtle creature.

 

[Untitled-Dragon]

I was used to be a Final Fantasy fan but after 13. Well I had a falling out with the series. Seriously that was game that could put me to sleep if I played it longer than 2 hour. Hell, sometimes I fell asleep with the controller in hand. I tolerated their skimpy clad characters (females mostly), who made me want to ramble about how their "armor" would protect them. Never went back since FF13.

Anyway I am impressed that yahtzee was able to play the game for 5 hours.

 

[WilliamRLBaker]

Not surprising though what is surprising is I rented the ps3 version and didn't even touch it...was having too much fun playing fable 2, I'm taking it back to blockbuster tomorrow without ever touching the game.

 

[Sakon]

When I got this game it was my birthday and I was so excited! I threw it in, watched the opening with fascination that quickly turned to boredom then I get to play. I've never played a game that sucked that fast. I'm a huge final fantasy fan, granted I hated the cast of 8 and 9 but I still bloody well played them. This game... FOUR hours later and I quit. Turned it in and haven't regretted it for an instant.

I swear the game really resented me trying to play it!

 

[skidmarquis]

I was let down by FFXIII as well, however 10 sec or so into this article I'd had it. The author is one the most pretentious and self admiring I've ever read, spending entirely to much time trying to be clever . Maybe I should have stuck it out a little longer and tried to find some redeeming qualities. Then again it's not like I'm getting paid, is it fella ?

 

[kaijyuu]

The only positive thing I can think of about this game is that I like Lightning's character design.



Also yay at referencing Edger's chainsaw. 6 is my favorite of the numbered series too, though I'll admit the battle system is extremely boring when put up to today's standards (however quite good for back then).

 

[Wounded Melody]

Also yay at referencing Edger's chainsaw. 6 is my favorite of the numbered series too, though I'll admit the battle system is extremely boring when put up to today's standards (however quite good for back then).

Noooo I love 6's battle system, or at least I didn't mind grinding...

 

[Paulie92]

Yahtzee opened a bar?!?! Who, what when and more importantly where?

 

[Sir Prize]

Yahtzee opened a bar?!?! Who, what when and more importantly where?

It's called the Mana Bar, it is in Autsrila(sp, sorry, but I'm half asleep right now) and it has video games!

OT: I was once a fan of Final Fantasy, getting into at FF9 and ending up hating it after FF10 part 2. I think this is the point where things got horrid, though FF9 and 10 did share the whole long cutscene thing.

Final Fantasy has out-lived its welcome now, all that is keeping it going are the fans that praise it. I was told by a fanboy who is a friend of mine that FF13 is the best yet and I did try it, after an hour I still wasn't into it and quit. Any game that takes longer then an hour to get into really isn't worth the money.

 

[Paulie92]

Yahtzee opened a bar?!?! Who, what when and more importantly where?

It's called the Mana Bar, it is in Autsrila(sp, sorry, but I'm half asleep right now) and it has video games!

Where abouts in Australia? God help him if it's in Sydney

 

[Wilbot666]

Honestly, I never thought I'd play a game that would make me wish for Final Fantasy 12's combat. Even that god awful crap was better than 13.

Whilst I never played XII and hence can't comment on it I kind of like the new combat system.
Don't get me wrong, my favourite 2 games out of the series were VIII and to a lesser extent VII which are both similar in their somewhat stilted combat style, but after I decided to give XIII a go I'm finding it deceptively deep.

Yes I was initially sceptical. If you let it, the game (XIII) will kind of play itself at first. However, now that a few hours have gone by and the characters have advanced further into their different skill trees I'm finding it a lot more customisable.

The ability to swap Paradigms on the fly makes your group vastly more malleable than in other games of the series. Need a Healer but also want to hand out some pain? Shift Paradigms and change your all-attack team to a mixture of buffer-healer-melee. Want to do steady damage but lessen damage taken from massive boss-attacks? Swap to a combat-offensivecaster-shield role and have one character soak up some damage for a few turns while the other 2 burn and bash your enemies.
The combat combinations that you can swap through really do spice up the combat and make it seem a little more diverse in some ways than the earlier games. Even my girlfriend who hasn't played an FF game since VII likes it, and I do too.

Once you obtain all the characters and can easily swap them in and out when you like between battles (not to mention creating your own Paradigm mixes with each different cast of 3) then you're ready to go nuts.

So yes, many people seem to dislike this game, but until I've finished it and also unlocked all the Ultimate weapons I'm reserving judgement. I certainly like it enough to keep pouring (copious) hours into it.

 

[Wounded Melody]

Yahtzee opened a bar?!?! Who, what when and more importantly where?

It's called the Mana Bar, it is in Autsrila(sp, sorry, but I'm half asleep right now) and it has video games!

Where abouts in Australia? God help him if it's in Sydney

http://www.manabar.com.au/

 

[mip0]

the bar's
OOOOOOHhh
The bar, right. Great!
Could you take us on a tour or something? Or atleast post some representative pics?
And what's on the menu?
(y, that's right mip0, he'll probably read post number 900 or whatever.)

 

[Lucifron]

Yahtzee hated it? Gee who'd have seen that coming? /Sarcasm

Don't lampshade blatantly obvious sarcasm, please.

OT: Well, Yahtzee really dislikes JRPG's and Final Fantasy I guess.

 

[Vohn_exel]

To be fair, the 7-10 crowd also has FF9 fans, and 9 was a direct throwback to the earlier games like 6. It was fantasy, it was pretty, it had campy villains, a world-shattering plot, an ragtag group of, thank God, NON-ANGSTY adventurers with actually decent character design, a simple and quick game mechanic... And most importantly, it had that magic. There was imagination and childlike awe involved in making it, and it shows.

Now, I played through all the other ones, but none of them were as fantastic. Designed-by-committee crap.

Another thing I know 9 did well is start off well, with a dramatic set piece, a theater play in a palace as a distraction for the kidnapping of a princess. Y'know, an intriguing and interesting development? If the designers are incapable of ever doing something like that again, then Yahtzee is within his right to call bullshit when game fails to impress him early on.

That probably is why I never did like 9 as much as the others...although 8 will always be my favorite anyway. But I did like the world and some of the characters, but I couldn't get into the main character for some reason. I need to go back and play it since I do love most FF's and thats the only one I haven't really played alot of.

And don't be fooled, I'm not defending the game against Yahtzee's criticisms. Infact, I agree with everything he said save for the battle system. I really want to play and beat FF 13, but everytime I play it I get that feeling of doing work, and wanting to not play it anymore.

I've read a bit about Versus XIII and it sounds like it might be what I felt was missing in this one. It sounds like it's gonna be a more return to at least the FF's of the days of 7-10. I'm all for that, and I loved Kingdom Hearts fighting style, so this should be the game for me, hehe