Zero Punctuation: Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

[Charli]

I have the urge to try the egg thing but with honey mustard... mmm.

 

[szaleniec1000]

GTA London 1969 in 3D? Hell yeah.

 

[bjj hero]

Theres a reason GTA didnt really take off till 3, the top down thing is awful. They should have left it.

Branston pickle is sweet; chocolate is sweet, it just might work...

 

[TwistedEllipses]

It's a shame the Branston pickle egg thing didn't work out...

 

[cathou]

i really liked the camera joke. i laught out loud in the office. good thing i was alone...

 

[Nekroneko]

I have this strange urge to pickle a cream egg at work for a customer. Then again I want to be around for the person actually indulging in the egg, so maybe pickle one for the staff room. Hmmmm...

 

[Kuliani]

I really wish the chocolate eggs were that size (in proportion to the size of his head).

 

[Quadtrix]

While the Wii is definitely lacking in features, it's still may favorite console, because A: No one I know with a 360 hasn't had it break down less than 2-3 times, and B: The PS3 just isn't in my near-poverty price range. Sure the Wii is lacking in features that it could easily pull off, but it's affordable and sturdy.

 

[Snoopster]

Hahaha, taking a stab at the good old economic crisis Superb; from this I have been inspired to invest in Class A drugs to become prosperous and successful!!

Personally I don't see how you can have anything on the DS other than the good old Pokemon up, down, left,right zig zag movements.

I'm all with you apart from one thing, ever played metroid prime hunters on the DS?
Fiddlyness is made up for by length of game, decent(ish) story and possibly the most precise aiming system ever

 

[Snoopster]

I really wish the chocolate eggs were that size (in proportion to the size of his head).

drible, slaver, OH NO BRANSTON PICKLE!!

 

[Slash Dementia]

Great review. I loved the DS controls part--It's the same reason why I sold my DS.

 

[Shapsters]

So hard to please.

 

[NOOBSAUCE]

Hurray the retard baby prophet has been born to lead us to the promised land.

Oh, and the bit about the branston pickle is good to know.

 

[almaster88]

Who else has got poor arthritic thumbs from video gaming too much also? ( me me!)

On a second note: mmmmmmm creme egg.. yum

 

[Dyskresiac]

Found it below average compared to The Escapists other webseries'. I laughed only at the Cream egg/Branston Pickle joke.

I find this confusing since escapist is really nothing but a bunch of kids whining and complaining with very very low brow humor. (Save from Yahtzee.) It could be that you just happen to like that kind of "Leave your brain at the door" fart joke humor, at which case it doesn't surprise me that you don't enjoy ZP as much.


That being said, Yahtzee really cuts through the bull when it comes to games and isn't afraid to give a game a good review if it is actually good. Seeortal, Super Paper Mario, Psychonauts, Saints Row 2, etc. I just find that a lot of other reviewers (primarily IGN) rate games based on the hype factor associated to them. GTA games will always get better reviews than Saints Row games simply because they're more popular. Oh and, do I have to invoke the "Kayne & Lynch" law of reviewing?

I do disagree with him a lot, specifically when it comes to JRPGs, but he defines what it is he likes, what it is he doesn't like, and lets you form your opinions around that. You might like something he hates, or vice-versa. It beats rating things on a scale of 1 to 10 and just leaving it open to guessing.

Thus, why I never pay attention to any other reviewer.

 

[SmilingKitsune]

Henry Hatsworth pulls off the buttons with touchscreen very well, honestly. Good review, though. And I'm curious if you really did do the Cadburry Egg thing.

Welcome to the escapist!
And I agree, Hatsworth pulls it off very well, I shall also be investigating this egg idea.

 

[skfd]

I liked 2D GTA better than this new releases.

 

[KingKamor]

Thanks for making yet another great video. You may not care, but my PS2 memory card got corrupted and I've been depressed all day. This really cheered me up, and I thank you for that.

 

[beemoh]

Incidentally, I do think there are SOME games that impliment both standard control scheme and touch screens. "Super Princess Peach" is one (and yes, I am a guy and I like that game. So sue me.) "Sonic Rush" and "Sonic Rush Adventures" used it well too, really only using it for the chaos emeralds or seaboard missions respectively.

Agreed- I think it depends on what it expects you to do with both- while the touchscreen-as-analogue-stick thing has never worked and will never worked, Mario 64 DS- on launch day managed to mix both stylus and buttons by having both sets of buttons perform the same action. Picross and TWEWY can also be added to this list.

In fact, I'm guessing the DS is symmeticial for a reason...

 

[Al_]

I'm guessing the testcard (the picture towards the end whilst he tried the branston pickle creme egg) will have made little sense to non-british viewers? Possibly even no sense to younger British viewers. Hell, are Creme Eggs and Branston Pickle even common in the US, Aus and wherever else so many viewers will be?

If not: Thankyou Yahtzee. Thankyou for crafting a joke that can only really be got by us here in the UK plus random expats.


(I'm rather enjoying Chinatown Wars. The only touch screen bit that's annoyed me so far has been flat-lining people in the ambulance. Only time I've really felt the need to be using the screen and buttons at the same time, and I have considered holding a stylus- possibly the plectrum one from Guitar hero- in my mouth and smashing at the touch screen with my face. This may not be ideal.

Also, the toll gates are on ONE bridge. Only in one direction are they at the end of a long straight)