Zero Punctuation: Halo: Reach

[Xarhs Vrentas]

What the hell is Oni? I had never heard of it until today!

 

[gphjr14]

One last thing, Escapsit. Please, please, please, please, PLEASE stop with that stupid Slim Jim commercial. I know they're giving you money, but can you please just put a banner ad or soemthing? It's too long, it's stupid, it's geared to six year olds, and it definatly doesn't make me want to buy any. Frankly, I'm insulted everytime I see it, and I have to put up with it almost every time I watch a damn movie here. I go on this site everyday, but I'm concidering stopping if this keeps up and I'm probably not the only one.

If you give Escapist the token amount of membership money, then you aren't presented with advertisements. Might make things a little more bearable for you.

At least it isn't like stupid ass Gametrailers.com they play the same stupid Red Dead Redemption commercial on every ad for about 2wks now.

I gotta agree with Yahtzee the game is pretty good but at heart I'm just a 3rd person kind of guy. I just never got how the 1st was called combat evolved when there really wasn't anything new.

 

[mik1]

One last thing, Escapsit. Please, please, please, please, PLEASE stop with that stupid Slim Jim commercial. I know they're giving you money, but can you please just put a banner ad or soemthing? It's too long, it's stupid, it's geared to six year olds, and it definatly doesn't make me want to buy any. Frankly, I'm insulted everytime I see it, and I have to put up with it almost every time I watch a damn movie here. I go on this site everyday, but I'm concidering
stopping if this keeps up and I'm probably not the only one.
I agree!


and i enjoyed halo reach (forge is the highlight)

 

[VirusHunter]

HEY MAN I RATHER ENJOY HALO REACH RAGE RAGE RAGE

But you know what, I'm not even mad because people can have their own opinions and I will respect said opinions. Although everyone should know that in order to have a legit opinion of this game, you actually need to have played it before. Don't go saying you don't like green eggs and ham if you've never tried it.

Firefight from what I can tell is a massive waste of time.

I played one solo yesterday, took me like 25 minutes and got to the 4th wave and at the end of it all I got was like 60 friggin credits. 60???? For real??? What the hell's the point of that shit. I get more off the lotto machine on any deathmatch.

>played one solo
Well there's your problem right there

Also guys getting pissed off thanks to video advertisements, get yourself some Firefox and the AdBlock Plus add-on. You can thank me later.

 

[Nabirius]

Yeah, I'll rent it. I can't believe some people actually reacted ti this game just like Egoraptor's Awesome Reach (look it up). This is NOT going to be the end of Halo, and there's something wrong with people who think otherwise.

One last thing, Escapsit. Please, please, please, please, PLEASE stop with that stupid Slim Jim commercial. I know they're giving you money, but can you please just put a banner ad or soemthing? It's too long, it's stupid, it's geared to six year olds, and it definatly doesn't make me want to buy any. Frankly, I'm insulted everytime I see it, and I have to put up with it almost every time I watch a damn movie here. I go on this site everyday, but I'm concidering stopping if this keeps up and I'm probably not the only one.

Oh, god damn it yes, that fucking slim jim add, is this what people think gamers find fun or cool?

 

[Forgetitnow344]

I'm surprised. He didn't hate Halo Reach...

No, he hated it. But, it's nowhere near the level of hate that he has for games like Too Human and the Wolfenstein Reboot.

Also, I've never liked the Halo games precisely because there's no iron-sights aiming. In FPS games, I specialize in sniping and long distance single shot kills. So, a game that forces me to get up close with an underpowered weapon and stand there like a slack-jawed mental patient holds no appeal to me, whatsoever.

One, when taken in the context of the way he talks about video games, he clearly liked it but is annoyed by fanboys. Two, you clearly are bad at FPS games if you think that is how to play Halo. If you are a fan of headshot kills, most things in that game can be killed with three or less headshots on Legendary (the annoying setting full of artificial difficulty - seriously, the enemy is no smarter, just has more health), so there you go. Also, why would you ever get that close with a Spiker, the only underpowered weapon in the game?

You seem to be under the delusion that I actually care about the Halo games or ever bothered to really play them or learn anything about them. I would have thought that my statement about the games having no appeal for me would indicate that I've never really played them; except for the 4 days that I owned Halo 2, hated it, and traded it in for Metroid Prime 2, which was a far superior game, too.

When it comes to FPS games, I stick with the Rainbow Six games, the Metroid Prime games, and the occasional Call of Duty games. Halo is the Wal-Mart of FPS games: Everyone goes there, the prices are cheap, the store is large and comfortable; but, the selections are bland, the employees have no real excitement, and there are half a dozen different stores that have lots of stuff better anyway. You just have to be willing to fork over the cash.

>Claim to have no real experience with Halo and not care about it
>Proceed to make an inaccurate analogy about entire Halo franchise

This is not how logic works.

 

[SaberSpellSword]

for most cases, a game having to hold up on single player alone is true but there were still ppl playing halo 2 online while Microsoft was trying to close down the original xbox servers. Halo is so popular and loved that it never looses so many ppl online that the multiplayer aspect becomes useless. it does diminish when a sequel comes out but that's not going to happen for a few more years.

What I'm saying is that you CAN review the multiplayer of halo coz there are always going to be ppl playing it even for years to come.

 

[GrimHeaper]

it does diminish when a sequel comes out but that's not going to happen for a few more years.

What I'm saying is that you CAN review the multiplayer of halo coz there are always going to be ppl playing it even for years to come.

You think they are people.
How cute.

Speaking of seat belts that's one thing that continually pissed me off about this game. Why is it that no matter what vehicle you're in, you can get killed before the vehicle does?

I would be more concerned on how a .50 pistol can puncture a tank...

 

[hem dazon 90]

Well I liked it at least.


But hey that is the beauty of opinions.

 

[FlyAwayAutumn]

no forge, custom games, multiplayer or firefight review. I guess multiplayer is sorta understandable why he didn't review it but come on the others are all playable by yourself or even with buddies in real life.

Firefight from what I can tell is a massive waste of time.

I played one solo yesterday, took me like 25 minutes and got to the 4th wave and at the end of it all I got was like 60 friggin credits. 60???? For real??? What the hell's the point of that shit. I get more off the lotto machine on any deathmatch.

By yourself? As in the type of firefight where you play by yourself? For that you can change all the options, so if you got a lot of credits for it, then you could change the options so that you're invincible and can kill things instantly, and just farm all day long.

If your talking about firefight matchmaking and you're only getting 60 cR then you suck.

 

[SaberSpellSword]

I'm surprised. He didn't hate Halo Reach...

No, he hated it. But, it's nowhere near the level of hate that he has for games like Too Human and the Wolfenstein Reboot.

Also, I've never liked the Halo games precisely because there's no iron-sights aiming. In FPS games, I specialize in sniping and long distance single shot kills. So, a game that forces me to get up close with an underpowered weapon and stand there like a slack-jawed mental patient holds no appeal to me, whatsoever.

One, when taken in the context of the way he talks about video games, he clearly liked it but is annoyed by fanboys. Two, you clearly are bad at FPS games if you think that is how to play Halo. If you are a fan of headshot kills, most things in that game can be killed with three or less headshots on Legendary (the annoying setting full of artificial difficulty - seriously, the enemy is no smarter, just has more health), so there you go. Also, why would you ever get that close with a Spiker, the only underpowered weapon in the game?

You seem to be under the delusion that I actually care about the Halo games or ever bothered to really play them or learn anything about them. I would have thought that my statement about the games having no appeal for me would indicate that I've never really played them; except for the 4 days that I owned Halo 2, hated it, and traded it in for Metroid Prime 2, which was a far superior game, too.

When it comes to FPS games, I stick with the Rainbow Six games, the Metroid Prime games, and the occasional Call of Duty games. Halo is the Wal-Mart of FPS games: Everyone goes there, the prices are cheap, the store is large and comfortable; but, the selections are bland, the employees have no real excitement, and there are half a dozen different stores that have lots of stuff better anyway. You just have to be willing to fork over the cash.

>Claim to have no real experience with Halo and not care about it
>Proceed to make an inaccurate analogy about entire Halo franchise

This is not how logic works.

Exactly. Once you learn or figure out how the weapons work together (plasma for shields and ballistic for flesh and armor) the game gets really fun.

But you sound like a massive camper. Unless you nab yourself a melee weapon or a sniper rifle, its really difficult to camp in Halo since grenades are the only other instant kill weapon. that's why you probably don't like it. Am I right?

Try playing a game of SWAT in multiplayer. you'll love that (or get extremely pissed off). no shields so head shots are instant kills.

 

[rofl jet]

I was expecting another super smash brothers, where it takes him 5 months to do it, oh well.
It always bugged me how open and flimsy the vehicles looked in halo and the no seatbelt things when your rolling a warthog

Have you looked at the passenger, they're supposed to be sitting but instead they're crouching, they even have their foot on the dashbaord

 

[Dxz5roxg]

First off I was amazed he actually played it but when I watched it and realized he wasn't going to completely rip it to shreds I think my mind exploded a little.

 

[McMarbles]

Yes, Yahtzee, it actually was an original ending... two years ago, when FFVII: Crisis Core did it.

 

[GrimHeaper]

People don't need seat belts in Halo because of artificial gravity and/or some other advanced and vague technology.

It's a game set in a fictional future where we have faster-than-light slipspace travel and where we're fighting aliens with fucking plasma rifles. And you're concerned about the fact that there are no seatbelts?

Yeah, plasma rifles and FTL drives but their big counter attack is a bunch of dorks in friggin Jeeps. Don't the USMC or whatever have any real fricken armour or combat vehicles? Yeah, scorpion. But where are the APCs? or anything. Hell where are all the vehicles from Halo Wars. Some of the set pieces from Reach were frankly absurd.

The scorpion tank is designed so poorly :/
You would think they would make something better than that tank.

 

[The Rookie Gamer]

What I learned today:

I technically don't exist, seeing how I am a hardcore Half-Life fanboy and also think that Halo is a fantastic series.

Thank God for these forums, or I never would have realized that.

Well, since I love Portal, and love Halo, I'm also mythical. What should we call ourselves? Bavles?

 

[sepukumon]

OMG HE WAS WRONG ABOUT THE STORY!!! YAHTZEE IS AN IGNORANT FAG!!!!!!!! just kidding haha great video though i dont think that was the start of the covenant war. i confess to reading the halo novels and thats how i know it but i think they mention how long the war lasted at some point during the game, dont quote me on that though.

 

[Flamma Man]

Repetitive gameplay? Are you kidding? Every headshot, every twitch kill is a completely new and different experience from the last. Like in the degrees you turn. And who you're killing. And stuff.

...That's like saying office work isn't repetitive because every group of words you write/type is completely different from the last.

He's being sarcastic, I suck at recognizing sarcasm on the Internet and even I got that.

 

[clockout]

Yes, Yahtzee, it actually was an original ending... two years ago, when FFVII: Crisis Core did it.

Remember the Alamo...

 

[Worgen]

I was expecting another super smash brothers, where it takes him 5 months to do it, oh well.
It always bugged me how open and flimsy the vehicles looked in halo and the no seatbelt things when your rolling a warthog

Have you looked at the passenger, they're supposed to be sitting but instead they're crouching, they even have their foot on the dashbaord

yeah, really the vehicles in that game wouldn't be good to fight in but they would be great for launching your passengers into space with