Zero Punctuation: Hitman

President Bagel

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Bailey's makes for a nice way to wash away the cheap taste of that microwavable shepherd's pie I just ate. But try as I might, I can't taste any salted caramel flavouring. Tastes just like regular Bailey's to me.
 

Erttheking

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Man, I remember all the times I didn't get the "never got stuck in a loveless marriage," bonus.
 

LaughingAtlas

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The permanent scowly-face is funny to the point that it distracted me from what he was actually saying a few times.
 

Solkard

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Hang in there Yahtzee, your dream will come true one day.
http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-37904703
 

darkrage6

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I despise this games's business model, it's horribly anti-consumer, and i'm really surprised Yahtzee didn't rail on this game for having PS4 exclusive DLC(the Sarajevo Six missions). The game itself is decent, though the story is not very good, I honestly liked Absolution, sure the checkpoint system may have been the wrong move, but the game felt a lot more engaging and less obsessed with scavenger hunts.
 

Darth_Payn

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Funniest thing I'll see all day is the scowly faced Agent 47 in a frilly French Maid outfit.
 

moosemaimer

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Apr 14, 2011
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That's the problem with bodies.

But you gotta do it right. I mean, you gotta have the hole already dug before you show up with a package in the trunk. Otherwise, you're talking about a half-hour to forty-five minutes worth of digging. And who knows who's gonna come along in that time? Pretty soon, you gotta dig a few more holes. You could be there all fuckin' night.
 

Thanatos2k

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Caramel Frappe said:
I noticed a lot of developers these days make really good maps with a lot of things to do, but ... try to make it into a checklist / achievement hunt instead of an actual sandbox mode. When I think of Open World / Eat Your Heart Out videogame, Witcher III comes to mind that has stuff for you to do but never makes you go through the same places over & over again.
I think they're afraid that a modern gamer would load up the game and then just go "Well what am I supposed to do!?!?!?" and turn the game off in confusion.
 

Lex-Man

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Maybe it just because I'm not a games journalist or 12 but having the game arrive in small chunks really worked for me. I never have that much time to play games. So hitman was great as I could sit down for a couple of missions have a bit of fun, stop playing for a couple of weeks and then rinse and repeat.

Basically having a life, job and commitments sucks.
 

Canadamus Prime

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Have I ever mentioned that I hate the current AAA gaming industry? No? Well I hate the current AAA gaming industry. Fuck them.
 

Sheo_Dagana

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Lex-Man said:
Maybe it just because I'm not a games journalist or 12 but having the game arrive in small chunks really worked for me. I never have that much time to play games. So hitman was great as I could sit down for a couple of missions have a bit of fun, stop playing for a couple of weeks and then rinse and repeat.

Basically having a life, job and commitments sucks.
I know how you feel, but there are still games where you can have such an experience without them being stitched together - I've slowly been playing Skyrim piece by piece since it's release back in 2011. Same with the Witcher 3, Dark Souls, or Grand Theft Auto. For me though, having a game arrive in chunks limits how much of my free time I could put into it. When Life is Strange had unpredictable release dates for it's episodes, I was frustrated because there were times where I had plenty of time to play it and wanted to continue the story, but was unable to because it hadn't arrived yet. When episode 4 finally dropped, I was busy for months before I could get to it again.

OT: It's cool that Hitman is back to form (even though I DID like Absolution) even if it does hold your hand a bit so you can get the fancy kills. Like Yahtzee, though, it could get tiresome in the Hitman days of yore when you'd be just getting around to setting your kill up, and then suddenly someone finds a body in a place you spent almost an hour making sure no one was patrolling, and then shit gets crazy fast. I still have yet to play it, but I'm definitely interested in giving it a whirl. I can forgive the overarching story not being all that great, because I mean, it's not like Blood Money's is all that great. Just a neat title screen that changed as you got further in the game.
 

axlryder

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Jul 29, 2011
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I personally like the format. Now, I wouldn't recommend this as as standard, but the episodic format works particularly well for Hitman due to it really playing to the series' strengths. These maps are very much designed, from the ground up, to be played a LOT. While many of the kills are pointed out for you, there are some really zany and obscure ones that definitely reward creativity in your play. The list of things to do are just there to aid the player and facilitate their own exploration (and pacify the completionist types).
 

WhiteNachos

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You know you can turn off the breadcrumb trails in the settings menu, and it makes the game a lot of fun because you have to figure everything out on your own.
 

Sheo_Dagana

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WhiteNachos said:
You know you can turn off the breadcrumb trails in the settings menu, and it makes the game a lot of fun because you have to figure everything out on your own.
Score, once I pick up the game I'll totally do this.
 

Gatlank

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Thanatos2k said:
Caramel Frappe said:
I noticed a lot of developers these days make really good maps with a lot of things to do, but ... try to make it into a checklist / achievement hunt instead of an actual sandbox mode. When I think of Open World / Eat Your Heart Out videogame, Witcher III comes to mind that has stuff for you to do but never makes you go through the same places over & over again.
I think they're afraid that a modern gamer would load up the game and then just go "Well what am I supposed to do!?!?!?" and turn the game off in confusion.
I think there was one Skyrim review on metacritic just like that.
 
Sep 24, 2008
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I find it disturbing that we are so used to always online shenanigans that we don't even think about them any more.

One of the most distressing things to me is that you can buy this game, and lose like 90% of the content if you aren't online. Your items, saves, challenges, ability for unlocks... all that stuff will not be allowed if you play offline. Basically, all the things the developers added to make the game "worth it" will be lost even if you already bought them, because the always online DRM is so crucial to the experience. And forbid if steam or their servers happen to dip out while you're playing. You're booted and all your progress is lost for, again, things that are not your fault.

To me, Online DRM will always be just as a bad as the episodic piecemeal selling feature because once again, it means you're not getting all your game due to the developer's actions. It's even worse because we don't know what will happen with the game once Square Enix decides they are done with the game. Will they wave their hand and make all offline features available once they abandon the game? For some reason, given the past, I highly doubt it.
 

Drathnoxis

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Ugh, why can't I watch videos on the site anymore? All I get is 5 year old ads for the Escapist -_-
 

ToastyMozart

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WhiteNachos said:
You know you can turn off the breadcrumb trails in the settings menu, and it makes the game a lot of fun because you have to figure everything out on your own.
Heck, you can turn off practically every UI/helper element if you want to. I really appreciate devs that let you customize the interface/tell overbearing tutorials to fuck off.

But fuck Square Enix for throwing in an unnecessary always-online requirement in this SINGLEPLAYER GAME, and that Elusive Target bullshit.