Zero Punctuation: Mass Effect
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
- Start date
Post Merry Christmas everyone would like a Christmas review but oh wellebannaw said:
Ebannaw, Where to start, i have no idea how you could love a game so much like if you want like if u want grab ur own cock and put it through the lil hole in cd, btw i hope your using lube. Mass effect Isn't the gold chariot that descends from heaven and saves you from your days toiling in the dirt and takes you to the land of the RPG grinding. Now as Yahtzee has clearly stated that he isn't a big fan of RPG grinding and he has trouble understanding why people like you do like the grind.
now figure 09 has said
"jst to put it this way, i love RPGS, i dont get how masseffect is one though. and its no bloody fun, having 2 pause 2 open ur effing combat wheel thingy every 2 seconds."
well if thats true about the combat wheel then thats pretty shit. now Ebannaw you start talking about the characters and the life story and well NOBODY CARES ABOUT A CHARACTER IN A GAME BECAUSE THERE PIXELS AND PROGRAMING now sometimes people could be moved if it was 100% accurate in history or on the present. Now figure 09 i know what your saying but mass effect is a RPG and you can tell because you choice you attack and it rolls things like if it hits and much damage it dose and if the dodge and so on and so forth, but the attacks should be on a continues loop once you choice the attack and not have to choice it over and over
so yeah ebannaw i hope that one day you will crawl out from your basement/gaming place/bedroom and go hang in the sun, all the best Duwom
P.s you have to excuse my bad grammer its early and i stayed up to about 3
"jst to put it this way, i love RPGS, i dont get how masseffect is one though. and its no bloody fun, having 2 pause 2 open ur effing combat wheel thingy every 2 seconds."
well if thats true about the combat wheel then thats pretty shit."
Its not true. I hardly ever bothered using the combat wheel. There is not any reason to use it more than once a battle and even then even once isn't usually nessesary.
"now Ebannaw you start talking about the characters and the life story and well NOBODY CARES ABOUT A CHARACTER IN A GAME BECAUSE THERE PIXELS AND PROGRAMING"
Frankly that is crap. The essense of RPG's (And many Television shows and movies and even books) is to make the viewer/player/reader empathise with the characters. In a well made game even though we know they are pixels we don't treat them as such and that's what makes great characters.
Now back to other things:
Going back over Yahtzee's review I still find it more perplexing and lackluster. The fists 2 minuted were pretty good until it got to the dialouge critisism. In the end it seems as though he decided to hate the game before he played it and as a result it seems fake.
well if thats true about the combat wheel then thats pretty shit."
Its not true. I hardly ever bothered using the combat wheel. There is not any reason to use it more than once a battle and even then even once isn't usually nessesary.
"now Ebannaw you start talking about the characters and the life story and well NOBODY CARES ABOUT A CHARACTER IN A GAME BECAUSE THERE PIXELS AND PROGRAMING"
Frankly that is crap. The essense of RPG's (And many Television shows and movies and even books) is to make the viewer/player/reader empathise with the characters. In a well made game even though we know they are pixels we don't treat them as such and that's what makes great characters.
Now back to other things:
Going back over Yahtzee's review I still find it more perplexing and lackluster. The fists 2 minuted were pretty good until it got to the dialouge critisism. In the end it seems as though he decided to hate the game before he played it and as a result it seems fake.
To those who think Wall Of Text redeems Mass Effect:
Why not read a novel instead? Or a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure story? Both are just as fun as Mass Effect...and without any glitches too!
***
This wasn't ZP's finest hour, to be sure. Then again, Yazthee didn't like RPGs. I do, but I won't take it as hate speech, I take it as a legit criticism of the RPG gerne, and why I never actually play RPGs even though I like them.
Why didn't he mention "A Galaxy of Fablous Wonderment?" though. I really liked that game, I really do.
Why not read a novel instead? Or a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure story? Both are just as fun as Mass Effect...and without any glitches too!
***
This wasn't ZP's finest hour, to be sure. Then again, Yazthee didn't like RPGs. I do, but I won't take it as hate speech, I take it as a legit criticism of the RPG gerne, and why I never actually play RPGs even though I like them.
Why didn't he mention "A Galaxy of Fablous Wonderment?" though. I really liked that game, I really do.
I think the devs were Campbell fans. At one point she will say "This is my boomstick!" if you try to talk to her in the party.
I would play ME instead of reading a book because I have more choice and I enjoy acting. Choose your own Adventure is terrible writing, so I wouldn't bother with that. ME is better.
I don't know if Duwom is joking, but you should care about some characters if it's done well, nothing in any media is anything more than words/actions presented to you, and ME has no dice rolls. So you really have no idea what you're talking about.
I would play ME instead of reading a book because I have more choice and I enjoy acting. Choose your own Adventure is terrible writing, so I wouldn't bother with that. ME is better.
I don't know if Duwom is joking, but you should care about some characters if it's done well, nothing in any media is anything more than words/actions presented to you, and ME has no dice rolls. So you really have no idea what you're talking about.
There is, because it looks stupid and is terribly unrealistic (I don't see many hideously androgynous people every day). Yes, there's suspension of disbelief, but if the characters don't know if they're a man or a woman, have DD breasts and a 10' waist, have eyes and mouths the size of their head, or get angsty and emotional about every little thing, it's annoying. And he is choosing not to play them.Ryuuku said:
Hmm, the male protagonists in Japanese RPGs often look like girls because it's one of the cultural standards in Japan. You may want to read on <a href=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bish%C5%8Dnen>Bishonen or something. It's not like we don't have cultural memes of our own, in movies, shows and games alike. I mean, what if some Japanese fellow asks you why are there always so many women in James Bond movies, and why most of them fall for the protagonist as soon as he enters the scene?
Huh?
Huh?
I'll just tell them that Bond is a handsome seductive man.Maurog said:
So you're saying in Japan, girls often like the "homosexual" looking guys?
By "homosexual-looking" you meant "effeminate"?SomeBlackGuy said:
With such phenomena as the popular all-female theater [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Takarazuka_Revue](coincidentally, most fans are female) and homosexual pornography for women [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yaoi] (most gay men don't like it), this trend doesn't look so surprising.
This is actually really funny.R Man said:
One of the things I've noticed about this game is that everyone loves to spout opinions on it, yet few actually spend enough time on anything higher than casual (very easy) difficulty beforehand to have any idea what they're talking about. If you don't use the combat wheel often you are doing something wrong. Yes, it pauses combat. You will be doing this all the time as was obviously intended. The most particularly useful and frequent combat pausing is done when fighting geth hoppers. You will not come close to surviving hardcore or insanity without using the wheel. Maybe veteran, but you'd still be making things harder on yourself just to play the game like it's Halo.
Having said all that, aside from your squad AI, the combat feels unique, fairly deep, and is a lot of fun. If you took away the combat wheel and its pausing you would be completely changing the entire game for the worse. It would almost certainly become more twitch than strategic RPG.
Story is good. Different choices are good. Side missions are a wash, as they aren't refined enough and the mako sucks. At the same time there are still enough good moments to redeem UCW if you ignore the collection / survey missions.
This game was also released before it should have been. Too many bugs for a title of this level. While they don't make it unplayable, it definitely takes away immersion sometimes. There's a lot to dislike about Mass Effect... but what there is to love makes it really easy to look the other way.
Never having played (and never going to), I just want to know: what do you do with the girl if you choose to be female?
Surely she can't ride your purple python then?
Surely she can't ride your purple python then?
"Why do they look like girls/pretty?"
It's just the pretty boy look that a lot of asian guys have, whether they like it or not (my friend complains about this and how he's hairless, "I got no f***ing 'stouche and chest hair!"), and the Japs seem to embrace it (they're not ashamed about it and rightfully shouldn't). You can't help it if you look like that. If anyone's wondering why a lot of them are so slim with little muscle try living in Japan for a month or just live super healthy. The look doesn't appeal to everyone, and to the macho it probably looks plain unmanly and homosexual. "Girlish swordsman Hiroshi" XD
It's just the pretty boy look that a lot of asian guys have, whether they like it or not (my friend complains about this and how he's hairless, "I got no f***ing 'stouche and chest hair!"), and the Japs seem to embrace it (they're not ashamed about it and rightfully shouldn't). You can't help it if you look like that. If anyone's wondering why a lot of them are so slim with little muscle try living in Japan for a month or just live super healthy. The look doesn't appeal to everyone, and to the macho it probably looks plain unmanly and homosexual. "Girlish swordsman Hiroshi" XD