Zero Punctuation: Monster Hunter Tri
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
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Heh, i live in Australia, about an hour train trip each way to/from work, So that allowed us to take on 2 missions for each trip, and eventually 3 missions a trip. I think wifi multiplayer is more viable than you think. Like most people eat during the first 20 mins of lunch and have an extra 40 mins to waste.
'Firing on all cylinders' I think you'll find it is. Like an internal combustion engine ... If someone wants to be a game reviewer he should review games.Zerophon said:
I see no review of a game here ... seriously ... he picked up the controller for 20 minutes, put it down, then went on a diatribe about how Japanese games are completely alien concepts of electronic entertainment (like Zelda, Metroid, Mario Bros. eh?), how the wii sucks, and how he's a righteous paragon of knowledge of what makes video game perfection.
If Yahtzee doesn't want to be criticised maybe he should change his title to 'Video game comic' ... not a 'reviewer'. See a reviewer is somebody who judges the merits of a game ... not necessarily just writes a piece of fiction about a game without even looking at it beyond the box cover.
I live in Australia too :3 I have *NEVER* had an hour lunch break in my life o.oRaioken18 said:
That being said I live in the middle of Sydney and I do feel sorry for those that have to commute using the State's sub-standard public transport.
I doubt you're really going to find people playing psps at work or in uni ... I have seen a couple, but I think most people are like me and just spend their time cram studying and reading at uni because that stuff has to be done anyways, and you might as well do it then and there before your next tutorial/seminar/lecture.
Online is the way to go for people like me who haven't the strength to play video games beyond the comfort of a warm bed x.x That being said, I'm an old fart <.<
Regardless of whether or not people fully or partially base their opinion off the review, I see Yahtzee's style as I have stated; only stating in EP and his Bioshock review that pointing out the negative is his scthick and he likes the parts of games he doesn't bring up means that anybody who just watches his latest videos is potentially seeing them purely as serious criticism, and the fact he's posting a review of only the first hour or so of a game as a review of the whole game is outright lying.Zerophon said:
Even if you are smart, if you see a review that's negative, and then read positive reviews, you aren't going to ignore the negative review, and that's my problem. I don't take Yahtzee seriously. I'm not personally offended by him not liking the game; I don't like the one mission I have to do that involves not fighting stuff either, but I am offended by the fact he treats that as the entire game. I don't care if people take his reviews as fact, or even if they consider it, but as long as he knows people care about his opinion, he should actually make sure that opinion is researched, or at *least* point out that he got so bored he never got to the actual monster fighting.
I picked this up early because some friends said they liked the series. I don't talk to those people anymore. I do admit that MHT was kinda fun for awhile, pretty much until you fight the first boss monster, and getting that thing down feels like an achievement, but the very next mission is "fight that thing again in a slightly different way" with the added bonus of "oh btw, this thing is gonna randomly show up from time to time to ruin your day".
Then you have to spend 5 hours grinding said boss so that you can get the right items to get the new armour and weapon that you need in order to do even the simple missions from the next tier and so on and so forth.
Fuck that shit, I'm gonna play something else.
Then you have to spend 5 hours grinding said boss so that you can get the right items to get the new armour and weapon that you need in order to do even the simple missions from the next tier and so on and so forth.
Fuck that shit, I'm gonna play something else.
You know you only needed to fight it once, you basically bore yourself to death fighting one boss over and over for no reason. Way to go!Speakercone said:
If you have to grind Great Jaggi gear, something is wrong... for one thing, the drops are absurdly easy, so you can make it just form the two quests, and you can actually *buy* armor with a higher defense stat.Speakercone said:
It's more along the lines of you being bad at the game; I played in leather armor up to T3, then Pecco (the second boss) armor up to T6, with no grinding required. When I got a new armor set, Great Baggi, each fight was fast paced and took five minutes, and I fought three times for all the items in the set. Sure, it's kind of a grind, but it's fun, fast, and was only for a situation bonus, not because I needed to do so.
Weapons, you need to upgrade, but they require so little to upgrade you don't need to grind for it, at all.
Anyway, speaking of "five hours" grinding Great Jaggi, I can kill him in five minutes with crappy store bought gear. Assuming it takes you twice the time, that's 30 kills on the guy, which is far more than you'd need to equip an entire group with his armor, let alone just yourself.
I can understand it not being for you, but please, don't blatently lie about how you "need" each bosses armor to fight the next one (Jaggis are weak to fire, for god's sake, and the next boss is a fire monster! It's a downgrade!) and overexaggerate the amount of grind to get armor sets.
Not a fan of Yahtzee. I don't like how people deem him untouchable because "He is funny" or something. This only drives me to criticize him further. Going to post here, because no one seems to be doing a good job on that(no offense). Him being funny is true maybe once every 10 of the "reviews" he does(after he goes stale, anyway). He should really add in a laugh-track or something if he is going to aim that low. Well, unfortunately, he IS writing reviews. So I am going to break this down because it very much requires breaking down.
But first I want to comment what I see on this board. A lot you guys just love slobbering on his woo-woo. That's me channeling my inner-Yahtzee. Have you ever considered that Yahtzee would hate your guts if you ever bothered to read this godforsaken thread? He would vomit into his stupid little hat. You are the very fanboys he despises so much! My god, look at the first reply:
But a moment more before we get into the meat and bones(well, bones) of the "review", "critique", "parody", "satire", or "dicking-around"(whatever you may want to call it!) I want to point out Yahtzee speaks from a hilariously silly position. You see Yahtzee hates the Japanese gaming scene. He makes this as clear as possible! Unfortunately, he isn't able to do a very good job at justifying this hate. You don't begin your Monster Hunter review by talking about Harvest Moon. You don't begin many reviews with Harvest Moon, because you can list on one hand how "farm" sims(a stretch) there are. Only two are known universally: Harvest Moon and Animal Crossing. Ah, but yes, every Japanese game is about grinding. (Could he make it any clearer he has never played an arcade game in his entire life? Did he forget the times he played ports of those games? As if action games don't make up most of the Japanese market!)
He begins his review on low-note: "I didn't see any monsters fighting each". Of course you didn't! You didn't even make it to the point where you fought a single monster, let alone fight two monsters in one area. (You can see two monsters fight each other as early as the second monster you fight.) IGN wasn't dumb enough to spread misinformation with Tri, shouldn't we expect the same form Yahtzee, who is supposedly "above" IGN?
That brings us to the point why the review falls apart completely: Yahtzee didn't play passed the tutorial missions. He couldn't make any funny jokes about the game's difficulty, inventory, or anything beyond some off-topic JRPG(which MH is not, btw) rant. I guess we know why he spent so much time talking about MMO mechanics and such and not how the game plays because he didn't get that far. (And you know, if you pay attention you'll find this is most of his reviews. A bunch of rants about partially related material to hide the fact he has no expertise or even a simple familiarity with almost every genre. Well, except for the "Portal" genre - hurr hurr hurr.)
And here is where people justify his antics with: "Yeah, but it is so TEDIOUS!" Well you know, it is is a little tedious admittedly. But then again, it is also very short. It is not 2 hours long. It is roughly 30-45 minutes(and in that time you encounter Lagicrus and fight a bunch of minions to warm you up). 1 hour if you get lost every time(which means you needed the tutorial, anyway). So maybe Yahtzee can't be bothered to play Monster Hunter to the point where you TRY to HUNT a MONSTER. (lolololol. I love "corny jokes" as much as the next guy, but if all you have are corny jokes, that makes you a corny dude. With a corny hat.) Well, that doesn't change the fact his review is complete garbage. He can't talk about the game because he didn't play it. That doesn't change this mix of off-topic JRPG/MMO rants, laziness, masturbation jokes, and annoying opening into something else.
The big problem is that the whole game isn't like this. It isn't even a little like this. Yahtzee doesn't even know to imply it isn't and a little marry bunch here implies it doesn't. Well, couldn't you be more off? The game weens you off gathering as soon as the end of the second rank missions. You get a farm which grows most of the stuff in the game(so you only need one copy of something) and a trader to cover which you can't grow. And once you've beaten Great Jaggi you spend the rest of the game fighting big-ass monsters. There are quests where you fight the weaker minions or collect shit, but those are always optional(and after a certain point big monsters will appear during them. The game becomes a series of boss fights after the first hour. Ask anyone who played MH Tri more than Yahtzee and they will agree with this description.
With that out of the way, lets focus on the "lols" of Yahtzee:
-Thinks Moga Woods is the "over-world".
-Doesn't know about "Abandon Quest" option.
-Thinks that "quests" in Monster Hunter is side-content like a MMO.
-Never reaches any inventory space difficulties. (Or potential item creation failure, for that matter)
-Never reaches any item-usage difficulties. (Doesn't even make a potion-flex joke or how "stupid" it is to cook your own meat and etc)
-Never fights one "Monster". He didn't even reach Great Jaggi. He couldn't complain about how difficult he found the weapon controls. (Oh, and how he would!)
-And thus, never gets to complain about the few rare items of the game that you actually do grind for(Plates, Gems). I can't even counter it by saying "Because armor matters less(unlike a MMO), you can get by fine skipping them". (Why bother bringing up the defense that every set doesn't have them?)
-Never reaches Cha-Cha.
-Never reaches other areas.
-Actually waited by the water to fight Lagicrus again. (Biggest LOL of all)
-As usual, is too inept as a critic to mention online play. But hey, we can overlook that because he gives such informed criticism about the single-player. Okay, no more sarcasm!
You guys just eat it up! (Granted some of you don't know better, what with thinking Yahtzee is never wrong and no experience with MH to think otherwise). If you ever visit IGN or Gamespot you might just have an orgasm!
Also Yahtzee, health advice: lay off the cigarettes. Drink some water. You didn't always sound worse than my granddad. (And for my mental health, just stick to the adventure games.)
If you want to reply to me, I don't know if I will muster the strength to answer you. While there are a lot of people here could benefit from seeing Yahtzee take a good verbal spanking, it is just too likely that this board is full of people who can NEVER learn otherwise(too busy trying to win for Yahtzee, even though he would hate them) and trolls who couldn't cut it on 4chan or gamefaqs. Maybe if you are very kind, I'll answer any questions. Otherwise, I am fine with everything here being the last thing I say on this. (Alternatively: This review of Yahtzee is meant to be humorous! A parody! Satire! You can't judge what I say here - nananana!)
But first I want to comment what I see on this board. A lot you guys just love slobbering on his woo-woo. That's me channeling my inner-Yahtzee. Have you ever considered that Yahtzee would hate your guts if you ever bothered to read this godforsaken thread? He would vomit into his stupid little hat. You are the very fanboys he despises so much! My god, look at the first reply:
Yeah, it ranges a lot, but it mostly bounces between criminally unintelligent to completely uninformed. So let me just say it right now: if you played Monster Hunter beyond the tutorial missions(which Yahtzee didn't do) and don't agree that his review was incredibly uninformed - well, you're lying! (Common practice on the internet. We all want to "win" our internet debates at any cost. Win for Yahtzee, my friends!)
But a moment more before we get into the meat and bones(well, bones) of the "review", "critique", "parody", "satire", or "dicking-around"(whatever you may want to call it!) I want to point out Yahtzee speaks from a hilariously silly position. You see Yahtzee hates the Japanese gaming scene. He makes this as clear as possible! Unfortunately, he isn't able to do a very good job at justifying this hate. You don't begin your Monster Hunter review by talking about Harvest Moon. You don't begin many reviews with Harvest Moon, because you can list on one hand how "farm" sims(a stretch) there are. Only two are known universally: Harvest Moon and Animal Crossing. Ah, but yes, every Japanese game is about grinding. (Could he make it any clearer he has never played an arcade game in his entire life? Did he forget the times he played ports of those games? As if action games don't make up most of the Japanese market!)
He begins his review on low-note: "I didn't see any monsters fighting each". Of course you didn't! You didn't even make it to the point where you fought a single monster, let alone fight two monsters in one area. (You can see two monsters fight each other as early as the second monster you fight.) IGN wasn't dumb enough to spread misinformation with Tri, shouldn't we expect the same form Yahtzee, who is supposedly "above" IGN?
That brings us to the point why the review falls apart completely: Yahtzee didn't play passed the tutorial missions. He couldn't make any funny jokes about the game's difficulty, inventory, or anything beyond some off-topic JRPG(which MH is not, btw) rant. I guess we know why he spent so much time talking about MMO mechanics and such and not how the game plays because he didn't get that far. (And you know, if you pay attention you'll find this is most of his reviews. A bunch of rants about partially related material to hide the fact he has no expertise or even a simple familiarity with almost every genre. Well, except for the "Portal" genre - hurr hurr hurr.)
And here is where people justify his antics with: "Yeah, but it is so TEDIOUS!" Well you know, it is is a little tedious admittedly. But then again, it is also very short. It is not 2 hours long. It is roughly 30-45 minutes(and in that time you encounter Lagicrus and fight a bunch of minions to warm you up). 1 hour if you get lost every time(which means you needed the tutorial, anyway). So maybe Yahtzee can't be bothered to play Monster Hunter to the point where you TRY to HUNT a MONSTER. (lolololol. I love "corny jokes" as much as the next guy, but if all you have are corny jokes, that makes you a corny dude. With a corny hat.) Well, that doesn't change the fact his review is complete garbage. He can't talk about the game because he didn't play it. That doesn't change this mix of off-topic JRPG/MMO rants, laziness, masturbation jokes, and annoying opening into something else.
The big problem is that the whole game isn't like this. It isn't even a little like this. Yahtzee doesn't even know to imply it isn't and a little marry bunch here implies it doesn't. Well, couldn't you be more off? The game weens you off gathering as soon as the end of the second rank missions. You get a farm which grows most of the stuff in the game(so you only need one copy of something) and a trader to cover which you can't grow. And once you've beaten Great Jaggi you spend the rest of the game fighting big-ass monsters. There are quests where you fight the weaker minions or collect shit, but those are always optional(and after a certain point big monsters will appear during them. The game becomes a series of boss fights after the first hour. Ask anyone who played MH Tri more than Yahtzee and they will agree with this description.
With that out of the way, lets focus on the "lols" of Yahtzee:
-Thinks Moga Woods is the "over-world".
-Doesn't know about "Abandon Quest" option.
-Thinks that "quests" in Monster Hunter is side-content like a MMO.
-Never reaches any inventory space difficulties. (Or potential item creation failure, for that matter)
-Never reaches any item-usage difficulties. (Doesn't even make a potion-flex joke or how "stupid" it is to cook your own meat and etc)
-Never fights one "Monster". He didn't even reach Great Jaggi. He couldn't complain about how difficult he found the weapon controls. (Oh, and how he would!)
-And thus, never gets to complain about the few rare items of the game that you actually do grind for(Plates, Gems). I can't even counter it by saying "Because armor matters less(unlike a MMO), you can get by fine skipping them". (Why bother bringing up the defense that every set doesn't have them?)
-Never reaches Cha-Cha.
-Never reaches other areas.
-Actually waited by the water to fight Lagicrus again. (Biggest LOL of all)
-As usual, is too inept as a critic to mention online play. But hey, we can overlook that because he gives such informed criticism about the single-player. Okay, no more sarcasm!
You guys just eat it up! (Granted some of you don't know better, what with thinking Yahtzee is never wrong and no experience with MH to think otherwise). If you ever visit IGN or Gamespot you might just have an orgasm!
Also Yahtzee, health advice: lay off the cigarettes. Drink some water. You didn't always sound worse than my granddad. (And for my mental health, just stick to the adventure games.)
If you want to reply to me, I don't know if I will muster the strength to answer you. While there are a lot of people here could benefit from seeing Yahtzee take a good verbal spanking, it is just too likely that this board is full of people who can NEVER learn otherwise(too busy trying to win for Yahtzee, even though he would hate them) and trolls who couldn't cut it on 4chan or gamefaqs. Maybe if you are very kind, I'll answer any questions. Otherwise, I am fine with everything here being the last thing I say on this. (Alternatively: This review of Yahtzee is meant to be humorous! A parody! Satire! You can't judge what I say here - nananana!)
Keep in mind the delay for games to get to Australia (Yahtzee complains about it enough). Also, he stated before that he likes "reviewing" after the hype dies down. Also, he may have been interested in the game, and it may have been what he had completed for the episode (assuming he makes them in advance). He'll get around to the bigger titles, maybe next episode, maybe not.Mechanix said:
Plus, there wasn't much hype on this so he could tear it apart easier.
I want a T-shirt with that on!RobThePrezodent said:"Hunter gatherer of the young dinosaurs pathetically mewling their last as the glory of their mother's warmth slowly drifts away" sounds like such a good gameWell, I'd say after that review I'm probably not likely to buy the game, not that i would be likely to buy many games on the wii, but still..
I am fine with eveything you just said being the last thing you say on this too. Most people join because they like the site, wish to be part of the community and enjoy the reviews. Having a different opinion is perfectly legitimate, but being rude while one does so implies a great lack of repect to the people participating in this discussion. Have a pleasant day.Oh Hephaestus said:
I wonder why so many good received games are appearing in the Wii as they should, but I do not have the console (in fact ANY console, only PC), so I may be talking too soon.
Anyway, wasn't your birthday this Monday? if so, HAPPY BIRTHDAY YAHTZEE! Now lets all pretend nothing happened and get on with pour lives like Yahtzee would.
Anyway, wasn't your birthday this Monday? if so, HAPPY BIRTHDAY YAHTZEE! Now lets all pretend nothing happened and get on with pour lives like Yahtzee would.
That was you first post? It was hugely large?! Anyway, WELCOME TO THE ESCAPIST! It's okay to not like Yahtzee, because we like him because we do not like how he dislikes the games that we don't likely won't like. But anyway, have fun.Oh Hephaestus said:
So I'm guessing the next Extra Punctuation is going to be how not to start a game off? (Still waiting for the one about games that give you money but nothing worth spending it on)
Reading the comments it seems like Yahtzee only played through the tutorial and never fought any of the giant monsters advertised in the game. Perhaps he didn't but is three hours for a game to finally get going really good game design? Still, I've been interested in the Monster Hunter games for awhile since I've always wanted to club a T-Rex to death with a giant warhammer.
Edit:
Reading the comments it seems like Yahtzee only played through the tutorial and never fought any of the giant monsters advertised in the game. Perhaps he didn't but is three hours for a game to finally get going really good game design? Still, I've been interested in the Monster Hunter games for awhile since I've always wanted to club a T-Rex to death with a giant warhammer.
Edit:
Ninja'd apparently.SAMAS said: