Zero Punctuation: Red Dead Redemption

[lumpenprole]

The weird thing about this game, and I felt this about the older GTA's, is that I can list all the negatives and agree with Yahtzee all over the place, but I still can't stop playing it. He touches on this a bit, but it freaks me out.

It's like Rockstar has this patented special sauce that makes you not care when arbitrary design decisions get in the way of the game. Actually, they're a bit like Apple in that sense. "Oooh, a tablet computer I can't install things on? I MUST HAVE IT"

 

[mrclam]

The game has some glitches. Being patched.
You have to travel. It's a sandbox game... hello?

But being a sandbox would imply that traveling should be enjoyable and fun, no?

Would you watch a 20 hour long movie which consisted of 18 hours of looking at a horses butt?

Dont get me wrong, i love GTA:VC - it's my most favorite game. But this is the first time i've played a "gta-clone" which actually made me realise all i was doing was going from cutscene, to traveling, to short easy mini game.. and repeat.

I dont think i'd have so much of an issue with it, if the mini-games were in any way interesting/challenging or fun. Unfortunately they aren't. I'd have just as much fun playing a collection of wii mini games in something like carnival games. Hell, take carnival games, make you travel from location to location, put in an "adult themed" story - and it'd probably get 9/10 review scores!

So you're left with a lot of traveling, and unfortunately riding a horse is nowhere near as fun as driving through a crowded city at high speeds and hitting ramps, etc.

I actually DID fall asleep on one mission where i had to follow someone on a ride somewhere (so no fast travel allowed).. I woke up to find i've "rode" (is that a word?) my horse into a lake and died.

 

[normaldeviant]

Funny stuff as per usual. I can't say I didn't expect this kind of review, this is just the routine Rockstar has been doing for years, sandbox game with an everyman protagonist and some minigames. I played it for a short while and wasn't impressed. I got pissed off at one point when I had to do a race, where I got lost and ended up failing the "mission" when it turns out all I had to do was make it to the finish line, and all because my buddy wanted to race for shits and giggles. I played for only one shoot out after that. I could have played more, but, I had just bought super Mario galaxy 2, and I didn't want to spend my time gathering 12 wolf pelts.

 

[cocoadog]

I swear there are at least 15 different mini-games you can play with those mountain lions.

 

[onda]

Best one for a long time. Actually laughed at this one, rather than awkwardly giggling in the corner.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

Is it bad when you just have to say "That was a good review"?

 

[daxterx2005]

Give me some of your luck.
I've become a centaur on multiple occasions.

 

[cafeNoir]

I was looking forward to this review, as I find you're usually on the mark with your criticisms, but too much comedy-complaining about its trivial flaws-- a variation of which are part of the package in any open-world game-- we know-- has left you no time to address its genuine shortcomings or interesting elements. Neglecting the game's rather serious narrative and themes and simply reducing its entirety to a 'timesink' was kind of a letdown.

 

[Drauden]

Does he spoil the story? I haven't been able to play the game yet. :S

 

[Nautical Honors Society]

He shouldn't ***** about travel time in a game that offers free instant travel.

Yea I was wondering if Yahtzee knows about campsite insta-travel...

But anyway a funny and accurate review, the game does give you a lot of freedom and it is pretty glitchy.

 

[Actsub]

..Eh? Why did he blame having to hold a button to run on the Euphoria engine? Surely a game reviewer should know it uses the Frostbite engine and that Euphoria is for the character animation, unless he's twisting the facts to make lame jokes.

 

[Anaklusmos]

I actually loved this one, first one to make me laugh in real life since Resident Evil 5. One of my top three.

1) Resident Evil 5
2) Bayonetta
3) Red Dead Redemption

 

[glitch388]

Personally, i have experienced none of those glitches, and the only complaints i can sympathize with are the fact that money is kinda useless, and i have been blindsided many times by grizzlies and wolves who send me back a couple of hundred minutes and thousands of bounty hunting, criminal wrangling, and poker cheating-out-of dollars.

 

[Kanima423]

My question is ... will Roman call me and ask me if I want to go bowling? If so then I am gonna skip this XD

 

[Zudarkness]

I dare Yatzee to do a review on Alpha Protocal. I'm still getting the game,

 

[Odoylerules360]

Saints Row 2 was also a time sink.

This game looks oddly like most of what I've ever wanted from a game, so it better deserve all the hate you're giving it.

 

[Dfskelleton]

Sounds like an interesting game, but I probably won't get it. I' don't really like western games, but I do like the good old western films like The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, and A Fistfull of Dollars, but games about the wild west don't interest me very much. Funny review though, loved the mountain humping part.

 

[SharPhoe]

Well, at least he liked it. I may pick it up myself someday.
Something's nagging me, though: I feel like I've heard the phrase "Purple Monkey Dishwasher" somewhere before...

 

[mchoueiri]

This game was amazing and I have not run into this glitches and bugs in the game.

 

[Zudarkness]

1) Resident Evil 5
2) Bayonetta
3) Red Dead Redemption
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(Spolier alert)

Bayonetta is still my favorite. Best part was about her legs and pole dancing routine. Actually what were they actually thinking when they made the game. The special end dance sdequance was something else. I guess the main developer has a hard on for Libarians that love lollypops with glasses and tight outfits and boots. still though my favoruite was Neir. The name Twattycakes was funny itself. Still mine are as follows.

1) Bayonetta: Nailed it right on the head expecially The gerkin part. A clone of Devil may cry.

2) Wii resort: Funny review and some well good comments about some of the games. Yep nothing beats go old spoort actions like Flying WW 1 style like planes shooting at each other trying to pop their ballons. Sounds kinda dangerous for a SPORTS GAME!!! What next fot the Wii Sports. Wii Ballon Racing, Wii Ballon Fight, Wii 10 second car racing, Wii pimping.

3) Final Fanasty 13. Yep Vanille has to be literally screwed up in the head. Her GF animation sequances and her final attack is well something to be desire for itself, expecially the "see you later part after what appears to be a "climax from whatever as she is on top of what appeared to be a riding motocycle riding something". Play it or watch it for yourself. WTF was Squaresoft Thinking!? Yatzee should do a second review of the game after the first five hours to go WTF at the end. Vanille Ditist charater ever made for a Final Fanasty series. Thank you Squareenix for replaxing Riku as ditizest charater around.

4) Dante's inferano. Hialious itself expecially the hairy bum part. Yep good old hairy bum.

5) GOW III. Complex father issues anyone