Zero Punctuation: The Sims 3

[DeathWyrmNexus]

Apologies, I assumed you had actually watched the video to its conclusion...

Sorry, having a slow day - I assumed you were implying I am female. My screen name is slightly confusing, it would make sense.

Worry not, I was, though that makes your argument against this all a bit more disturbing as you said you took it personally (well closer to home which is essentially the same thing)...

I am almost afraid of walking into a TMI moment by asking how it could be Closer to Home without you being a woman? Actually, no, I will retract that question. The possible answer just gets more and more into my realm of not wanting to know as I ponder possibilities.

So my apologies and I will just go about leaving you alone now.

 

[Canadian Fodder]

Nice one, but you did get a bit off topic from the game and had to talk about EA. Still great as always.

 

[teknoarcanist]

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

In playing the sims, you come to realize:

You are not playing as a sim.

You are not playing as their house.

You are not granted even the tiny joy of claiming to play as their invisible, benevolent care-taker.

You are playing, my friends, as the Essence Of Tedium. As the tendency for patterns to assert themselves. As inevitability.

Plain and simple:
You are The Matrix.

 

[chuckman1]

I considered the ending to be the funniest part of the whole video.
I'm glad that Yahtzee was stuck reviewing this BWAHAHAH.
Sorry about your Vaginitus Yahtzee.
(That was a South Park reference)

 

[DeathWyrmNexus]

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

In playing the sims, you come to realize:

You are not playing as a sim.

You are not playing as their house.

You are not granted even the tiny joy of claiming to play as their invisible, benevolent care-taker.

You are playing, my friends, as the Essence Of Tedium. As the tendency for patterns to assert themselves. As inevitability.

Plain and simple:
You are The Matrix.

Great, now I want to get the game and demand a Matrix mod so I can send agents and Squiddies after my Sims and see a Neo Sim have more personality than the real thing.

If I had the money, I would do this and you can bet your freeze dried and fruit flavored soul that I would bleat on and on like a bellicose walrus with erectile dysfunction until I had the damn Matrix Mod so I could sit importantly at my computer and chant about how I am Colonel Sanders and they will bloody buy my damn Chicken because the Matrix Has Them!!!

 

[se7ensenses]

I feel the same way about The Sims: Evil.

 

[Midnight Voyager]

Sims 3 is indeed made of what my internal bits are currently producing.

(In other news, your review was ironic that way, damn you)

I use Sims 2 as modding practice. It is a very elaborate system of paper dolls that I decorate and then set up in houses and walk off, coming back later to see what chaos they have caused. I also hand-make the dolls, their bits, etc. Much replayability when you're pretty well doing just editing.

You can do absolutely none of that in Sims 3. Jerks.

 

[spuddyt]

Aww... I was hoping for the results of the prototype vs infamous contest
Still, entertaining review as always.

 

[agwellin]

What?! No trilbies?!

BLASPHEMY

 

[King_Pickles]

i thought crowshaw liked the sims??? he said im his spore review. huh mabye not

 

[brass munkey]

great review yahtzee

 

[bob-2000]

dude WTF
I was like OK a review on this game and then he loses me at the end about women being evil?

I'm not evil... (sulks in corner)
lol, good review anyway. I finally know why it is that The Sims totally creeps me out.

 

[WaffleGod]

Great review. You're totally right. The Sims is evil.

 

[gRiM_rEaPeRsco]

I think that bell noise is his new favourite sound

 

[leviathanmisha]

*facepalm*

Yahtzee must be having a really bad week, maybe he did get dumped. Well, there are still plenty of fish in the sea. But that was a harsher than normal review...only reason I play the Sims is cause it allows me to block out the sound of my mother yelling about something.

And Yahtzee, I'd recommend seeing a doctor some time soon, you don't sound like you're feeling well.

 

[WendelI]

"All Women Are evil"
"incidentally I'm still not GAY"

That was HILARIOUS.

 

[whaleswiththumbs]

Summer games drought... to be fair there is Red Faction: Guerilla, Overlord 2, The Conduit and a few others you could have ripped apart

Red Faction: Guerilla=(cheap) Doom Remake
Overlord 2= Medieval Sims 3(with the specific purpose to be evil)
The Conduit= Another(yawn) shooter

Yes, I am also sad there are no Trilby hats. Maks me kindof sad, I can't make a Yahtzee and torture him.

 

[MrPop]

There is more than one selectable town (Probably as said before) :O

Funny review although not his best.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

Ah, so I'm not the only one who got bored with The Sims waaaaaaaaay back in the first game because playing it felt more like work. Yahtzee you've managed to completely nail down exactly why I never got into this franchise. I'm not malicious enough to torture my sims and keeping them happy is too much work.