Zero Punctuation: Tomb Raider: Underworld

Volucer

New member
Sep 4, 2008
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Actually, that is a good point, Lara does smash up priceless artifacts for no good reason, and kill endangered animals. She could have left the Kraken alive and made millions by "King Kong"-ing it.
 

PedroSteckecilo

Mexican Fugitive
Feb 7, 2008
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Sabbad said:
PedroSteckecilo said:
Posting his "views" like this, borders on trolling in my opinion. Sure post your views in your blog, as a story or in another thread, or what ever - but choosing this thread is just bad form.
No, you are wrong, and I say this despite my issues with NC's original post. This thread is, presumably, set up as a place for viewers to give feedback to the video they've just watched. There's no reason that constructive criticism doesn't belong there.

EDIT: And what's the inverted commas around "views" supposed to mean?
Um... I didn't say that...I think you misquoted. Gldub was the one who made that particular accusation.
 

BIGpanda

New member
Jan 13, 2009
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good thing I never played TB.

nice jokes, the game all and all sucks and now I'm a slave to opinion. cheers ZP and cheers Yahtzee.
 

Silveth

New member
Jan 14, 2009
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@NewClassic's Post



I'm not sure if this against the internet code or anything, but I really feel I should address a few things to you about your comment on the latest ZP. Note: I will state this now, I am not some sort of ZP fanatic. I, being a writer myself, just hate comments like yours.



Firstly, get off your high horse. I can't imagine what sort or conceited, or, more likely, self-conscious person it would take to premake a post (which you most certainly did, seeing as how no one could type all of that in six fucking minutes) about how much you are "dissappointed" or "long for what it used to be" and then go and plaster pictures and a banner sapping off the the Zero Puncuation name just to promote yourself. That's really fucking insanely low, man.



Secondly, and really, most importantly, who the fuck do you think you are? Most every entertainer of any sort, be it music, painting, acting, or what have you, will agree that the HARDEST job in the entertainment industry is COMEDY. Yahtzee is payed to make humorous videos, sure, but who gives you the goddamn right to ask more of him? Oh, how quickly we turn on those we use to look up to. Yahtzee's review of Silent Hill will testify that fans will indeed never be satisfied with anything they are given. How long has he been doing these videos? A year, maybe? And he's already old to you? I think it's really just an issue of a short attention span on your end than it is a fault of Yahtzee's. It's his fucking video, not yours. Go do it better if you think you can. I'd love to see it and laugh at how fucking terrible it is. It would be one thing to try and add constructive criticism to someone whose work you care about, but, pointing again to the fact that you obviously wrote out that whole diatribe first and edited in Lara's name afterwards, you clearly just don't like the guy. Or, even worse, maybe you just needed the attention, and I am just feeding the troll here.



In any case, I really do hope you look at your bullshit and realize that bitching on the internet like that is fucking asinine and needless. But, that's just me hoping. I, unfortunately, know there are more people like you out there who only think of themselves.



And to the rest of you agreeing with this asshole, bugger off, you needy bastards, and make something of yourselves other than whining internet douchebags.
 

Fordo

Senior Member
Oct 17, 2007
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Spider tours...brilliant. I cannot count how many games I've played where that scenario can be explained by this one jab.

Great review.
 

The Tingler

New member
Oct 3, 2007
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Happy that Tomb Raider sold really poorly and most of Crystal Dynamics have been fired Yahtzee? It's all your fault!
 

binturong

New member
Jul 2, 2008
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I laughed more than I usually do at this episode of ZP but when it was over I found myself leaning back in my chair and sighing wistfully in admission that this is the way it's going to be for a long time. It's like we've been married for over a year now and like a good wife I still laugh at my husband's titty jokes but secretly wonder when he's going to get a real job.

That isn't fair to Yahtzee, really. ZP's charm has always been about pointing out the painfully obvious in overly-hyped video games when no one else seems willing to, and when it isn't doing that it's at least putting the whole industry under a humorous observational light. But the fact is that the entire gaming industry is in a lull right now and naturally that puts a damper on how many jokes you can make about it. After a year filled with Smash Bros. Brawl, MGS4, Fallout 3, Prince of Persia, GTA4, Spore and many others that I haven't even played because I just don't have that kind of money lying around, it's really difficult to get worked up about the upcoming year. It reminds me of our presidential campaign, which shovelled so much late-night joke fodder down our throats that when the president was finally elected, we had to loosen our belts and take a nap after having shot our comedy wads faster than you can say, "I can see Russia from my house." Now we have a new guy in charge and it's going to take a few months to settle down and figure out what's funny about him. He may turn out to be hilariously mockable but we just don't know yet.

So until we know what the economically slumping game industry is going to throw at us this year to make us prostrate to our digital overlords, we've got to put up with another few weeks of rehashed boobies from the likes of Tomb Raider Underworld. Ironic, since by now Lara must have enough gold artifacts in her basement to actually stabilize the US dollar.

Incidentally, I'm not a journalism student, I didn't write this thing up ahead of time and I'm not desperate for attention, so I feel a little out of place in this thread, but I still have an admiration for wordsmithing, and I always appreciate when someone gets right to the point instead of writing a 1,000-word essay that boils down to "Yahtzee sucks, ZP sucks, please don't flame me." And I've never understood why anyone has to justify liking or disliking something to anyone on the internet for any reason, since I'm pretty sure it's been scientifically proven that the internet has no taste. I understand we're in the age of information and everyone's opinion is a precious snowflake, but as Rep. Joe Baca (D-California) has proven, some people just shouldn't be encouraged to express themselves.
 

Baby Tea

Just Ask Frankie
Sep 18, 2008
4,687
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Silveth said:
*Snipped out the unnecessary cursing and paragraphs of 'not getting it'*
*Sigh*

Nuke was making a valid point, and that is this: ZP has gone from 'reviews with comedy' to 'comedy, with maybe reviews'. The entire point of the show has shifted! I'll quote Nuke himself:
NewClassic said:
I'd like to point out here that I'm not calling this video series bad. What it is has simply become something different.
Nuke isn't asking MORE of Yahtzee. He's asking for what Yahztee is suppose to deliver in the first place: A review.What we get, instead, is a pile of jokes that may or may not relate to the game (Or gaming in general) and possibly a review-esque type statement at the end.
Funny? Sure!
A review? No.

And I find it delightfully hypocritical that you ask by what right NewClassic has to criticize Yahtzee's work! I could spin that right around! By what right do you have to criticize Nuke's post? Well you both have the right, and it's called free speech. Were you to realize that, your entire second paragraph would be seen as, as the Greeks say, 'moot' and 'pointless'. Everyone has their opinion! You obviously have yours about Nuke and his post, I have mine about you claiming to be a writer, and Nuke has his about ZP.

If Nuke's post was a ridiculous as so many seem to claim, the MODs would take care of it. They do that. It's their job, and they are good at their job.
 

Zetona

New member
Dec 20, 2008
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NewClassic would have done better to rant in a new thread. He can't start a good debate with that rant in here.

The review was good, but I have this feeling that Yahtzee is ranting a bit more than usual about bad video games. He should calm down and review LittleBigPlanet, which I am surprised he hasn't reviewed yet. If he genuinely enjoys it, it will be the first genuinely positive review he's given in a while. If NewClassic is right about anything, it's that when Yahtzee reviews sequels these days, he spends too much time ranting about how the series should be ended.
 

Ace of Spades

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Jul 12, 2008
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I'm thankful that Yahtzee actually reviewed a game this time. Funny, as usual.
EDIT: Though on reflection, this wasn't much a review.
 

CB650

New member
Jan 14, 2009
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hardwarexpert said:
Been a long time viewer of Zero Punctuation and have never signed up to the Escapist until he mentioned Bristols!

I am from Bristol (UK) and most women born here have big breasts so I couldn't stop laughing when he referred to Lara's breasts as Bristols.

Good work as always Yahtzee!
Most woman from Bristol have large breasts?!?

Bristols is cockney rhyming slang for titties, Bristol Cities, nothing to do with the womenfolk of Bristol.
 

binturong

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Jul 2, 2008
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Zetona said:
He should calm down and review LittleBigPlanet, which I am surprised he hasn't reviewed yet. If he genuinely enjoys it, it will be the first genuinely positive review he's given in a while.
My guess is that's exactly why he hasn't done it. Although I think it could and should open the door to the "casuals vs hardcore" comedy closet, a raging debate that's as acrimonious as it is pointless, made all the more intense just for the fact that there aren't any good mainstream games to rage over instead.
 

Sabbad

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Apr 9, 2008
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PedroSteckecilo said:
Sabbad said:
PedroSteckecilo said:
Posting his "views" like this, borders on trolling in my opinion. Sure post your views in your blog, as a story or in another thread, or what ever - but choosing this thread is just bad form.
No, you are wrong, and I say this despite my issues with NC's original post. This thread is, presumably, set up as a place for viewers to give feedback to the video they've just watched. There's no reason that constructive criticism doesn't belong there.

EDIT: And what's the inverted commas around "views" supposed to mean?
Um... I didn't say that...I think you misquoted. Gldub was the one who made that particular accusation.
Ah, you are quite right, sorry for dodgy formatting. I'll edit the original.
 

The_Killing_Name

New member
Dec 29, 2008
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I totally agree with NewClassic, man
Yahtzee's just gone so downhill lately
At first, I liked his reviews, they were witty, and still told me much about the game
Now he just rants about crap games and how crap they are
He's basically become an old man.
 

Mrsoupcup

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Jan 13, 2009
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Tomb raider is long dead someone just needs to bury her.... in cement... on the moon... the nuke the moon... and take whats left... and throw it in the sun... and the halo 3 voice guy will say "overkill" hu, if like were like that you wouldn't need a slipnot.
 

Pastey Old Greg

New member
Jul 2, 2008
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Boy, I can't imagine how much biologists hate her. These are people that would trade their left nut to SEE a kraken, giant spider, or tiger, and she's putting a bullet in their skulls like there's no problem.