Zero Punctuation: Tomb Raider: Underworld

Doug

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Apr 23, 2008
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Thirdman said:
Vlane said:
Pretty good review to be honest but I still don't understand the "Lara == Bong" comparison.
I didn't get that either, maybe she's got a big arse. I never played them, I bought one of the games, once... and it crashed too much to play.
Its more she's overly thin, but still has a pair of big breasts and a pert arse.

i.e. Not a real person (sorry to smash the illustion guys ;))
 

Danglybits

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Oct 31, 2008
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Very entertaining and I have attempted to play the TR series too but I just couldn't stand the controls or the combat so I quit. The design of the character aside I didn't mind Lara on the PS because she seemed like a lady that sort of knew her stuff and her voice and accent were convincing and fairly real (if I'm wrong I'm sorry, its been a long ass time) but now I feel like they've added this desperate breathy-ness to the voice that says, "I'm totally hot for you; come play with me." I feel like every time gamers try to convince people that we aren't all totally sex starved, socially inept male kids looking for masturbation fodder it's kind of undermined by this kind of crap. The box art doesn't even feature her face, just a middriff and some titties.

But I kind of disagree with Yahtzee saying that they're trying to preserve her original design because I think that if anything they're adding a lot of Angelina Jolie to the mix as well.
 

Mooseman

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Jun 10, 2008
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Its not just male boob wanting men buying it. My girlfriend has it and loves the game.... Although maybe therres something there i should worry about. hah
 

ROFLross

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Jan 8, 2009
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I was going to rent this game to see how it was, I guess I don't have to now.
Thanks for helping me save money.
 

Metalrocks

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Jan 15, 2009
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likalaruku said:
lol. Guess the old girl wasn't up to learning any new tricks. Not any good ones anyway.
well, one is new. you can use your guns wile hanging around or standing on a pole. that made things easier.

@roflross
you still can download the demo.
 

Baby Tea

Just Ask Frankie
Sep 18, 2008
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SirSchmoopy said:
I'm only quoting this to tell you your avatar is awesome.
I wuv you Rob. Put me in a show (How many times do you hear THAT?). It could be a pointless plug for the shirts! But I digress.

Silveth said:
My point was that this show is made by Yahtzee, and no one else, and it's his job to make us laugh and write a good review. How is it fair for us to bash him when he can't do that? What right to we have to expect him to make us laugh? None at all, and that was my point. That, and that NC is pathetic human being for premaking that diatribe.

Anyway, why do you defend him so? If you apparently don't like ZP anymore then get off this site and stop trying to prove you're right to everyone.
Why is it that people think when Nuke said 'ZP has changed', they automatically think he's saying 'ZP is bad'? There is a pretty big difference!
You said yourself it's his JOB to write a good REVIEW. Well I would agree 100%. What Nuke is saying is that there isn't anymore 'review' part! It's just rants and jokes about the game, gaming, or gamers in general (If games at all) that might tie into a barely review-esque line at the end. That's the problem he, myself, and many others have with the 'new' ZP. Nuke even said specifically that the show isn't bad. It changed. And that change is the source of guff. We would like reviews again. Not animated rants based on jokes that run on for too long.

And I defend Nuke because none of you know him. Everyone doing the front-line attacking on his post is a new member to the forums, who obviously has no idea who Nuke is. Unlike many of the new members, I'm not here for ZP. I think it's funny that someone would actually say 'if you don't like ZP, get off this site.'
The Escapist has FAR more to offer then simply ZP. And that's what I'm here for! I'm here for the forum community (And Unforgotten Realms...I wuv you Rob), and the people here-in. I've gotten to know Nuke, among many others, over the time I've been here and know that Nuke isn't this spotlight seeking egomaniac everyone (And by 'everyone' I mean 'the ZP fanboys who foamed at the mouth when reading one word of Nuke's post') says he is.
I'm not here to prove that either Nuke, or I, am right. Though I would say the change from the earlier ZP and the new ZP is pretty undeniable. I'm defending him because almost 100% of every negative comment about Nuke's post has completely misread, misinterpreted, glanced over (Assuming they know what he'll say), and/or missed the point of his post.
That, and Nuke is a stand up guy, a good writer, and a strong contributor to the Escapist forums and site as a whole.
 

Labyrinth

Escapist Points: 9001
Oct 14, 2007
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Silveth said:
If you apparently don't like ZP anymore then get off this site.
Hi. I'm from Escapist. I've never posted before in a Zero Punctuation thread, and don't watch the videos very often. In fact, you could say that while I chuckle at ZP, I'm not a fan. Certainly not a rabid one.

I'm also a part of a much larger community which in fact shuns the comments on Zero Punctuation because we much prefer actual conversation. We lurk in regions such as the User Reviews, Roleplay and Off Topic sections. There's even a part for Gaming Discussion for the so inclined. The Escapist is much bigger than you think. If you don't like that, feel free to leave the site.

In response to comments on Nuke Lassic's review, I would like to say that he has a point. While the earlier production was not as slick as the later ones, it was more game based. Tangent jokes, while amusing, aren't such good things for the content level.
 

Schizzy

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Oct 9, 2008
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At the risk of being branded an outcast, here goes:

I absolutely did not a laugh at anything in this episode. I really wish I could, but I just couldn't.

Like one said, they can't all be winners.
 

Omega87

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Dec 20, 2008
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danebot said:
EDIT: Are you kidding me up there with that copy-pasted text wall?

You have something you desperately want people to read, and yet you say nothing. You perched like a sniper waiting for the video to be released so you could soapbox in the first few posts on a site that is full of peple who enjoy the videos. The worst part is, you think it's worth reading, and that you're brillant! Thanks for your comments, but next time I want that kind of counter-opinion in my house I'll just invite a Jehova's witness in for coffee.
Oh my god, most definately qouted for truth. 100% agree.
 

LisaB1138

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Oct 5, 2007
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I adore Yahtzee, but this "review" disappointed me greatly. It was not a review so much as it was one long breast and ass joke. I don't think he played the game very far, certainly not far enough to know that there weren't any boss fights.

I mean, his complaint that "we all know what the gameplay is" could be said about *any* sequel this year, yet these games got skewered for specific gameplay issues, not generically washed with the "it's Tomb Raider; let's all hate on it" brush.

I was actually looking forward to this review. After Yahtzee's extreme restraint in pulling out the breast jokes in his Soul Caliber 4 review (despite being accosted with breasts five times the size of Lara's and far more uncovered,) I had hope that perhaps he might avoid trite and overused comments regarding the franchise and treat the game as a *game* and not as a standup routine worthy of an off-strip, side-room Vegas comic. Clearly my hope was misplaced.
 

Sir_Chumley_Warner

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Dec 25, 2008
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Hmm, I'm surprised he didn't mention about filling every room you come across with some kind of water via the magic of ancient fluid inducing timing puzzles. Curious.
 

Stabby Joe

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Jul 30, 2008
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Ah yes, Tomb Raider, while not on the same level as Sonic, the popularity has slipped big time.

Loving the Jason connection by the way!
 

LisaB1138

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Oct 5, 2007
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Sir_Chumley_Warner said:
Hmm, I'm surprised he didn't mention about filling every room you come across with some kind of water via the magic of ancient fluid inducing timing puzzles. Curious.
That's because you only did it in ONE room. And I don't think he played the game that far anyway.
 

Fire Daemon

Quoth the Daemon
Dec 18, 2007
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Silveth said:
None at all, and that was my point. That, and that NC is pathetic human being for premaking that diatribe.

Anyway, why do you defend him so? If you apparently don't like ZP anymore then get off this site and stop trying to prove you're right to everyone. Oh wait, this is the internet, nevermind, let's argue for eternity then.
I would have you know that this is not Yahtzee's website and that there is actually a large number of people who come to this website for other reasons then Zero Punctuation. In fact I do believe that there are a large number of people who no longer watch ZP or, maybe, never have. Looking around at the Escapist, even at the page around a ZP video, it is clear that the website is more than just ZP. There is the articles at the bottom of the page, two Escapist show advert, two Planetside War adverts and links to all the different features, news, columns and the forums at the top of the page. I fail to understand how one who composes himself intelligently, such as yourself, is able to so narrow mindedly ignore all these things and think that the Escapist is "Yahtzee's website". At the end of each ZP there is his website address for you to go and check out, why do you all still think that The Escapsit is for ZP and nothing else. The stupidity is astounding, I still can't believe that people would be so narrow minded.

I would also have you know that Newclassic is not a pathetic human being. The fact that you label him as such because he expressed his opinions is frankly nothing sort of disgusting. A human is able to disagree with others and to voice his opinions without being labeled as pathetic, if anything having the guts to post his opinions to the fans of ZP makes someone much more than pathetic, in my mind anyway. The fact that you think of someone as pathetic because they disagree with you on the quality of a video is the most idiotic thing I have seen in a long time. Is it to hard to argue with people without resulting to name calling?

Now, you thinking that him pre-making that rant is pathetic also does not make much sense. I read the early draft of that rant (I even pointed out a missing letter) and the majority of it had little to do with the actual review then ZP as a whole. He didn't criticize this weeks review with a pre-prepared rant, he criticized ZP with a pre-prepared rant. Seeing as how the general consensus is that the rant will be better suited for it's own thread why is it wrong that he wrote this before this weeks ZP aired? If he wrote the rant in a separate thread before this one aired would be such a big deal? No it would not and I don't think this anything to do with comment etiquette (if such an absurd notion exists). I think the reason you think the reason you think posting a pre-prepared rant is pathetic is because that post does not agree with your tastes. Frankly, I think that, that is pathetic.

The Escapist is often described as "The last bastion of sanity on the Internet" and this has always been something that I have disagreed with. While I did disagree with that statement I always felt like this is a nice and friendly place, a place where everyone is generally nice to everyone else. However looking over this thread it seems that I may have been wrong. I've always thought that even those that fight and suck up in the ZP thread are genuinely nice people and that if they wanted could become the friends of everyone else that stays away from the ZP thread. Hell, I've even defended you lot at some points. For a while I used a ZP avatar as a very small protest against the pre-conceived notion that everyone with a ZP avatar is an idiot and a fanboy. But looking over this thread, especially at the snarky comments such as yours, I can't help but feel like this belief has been a lie, as if this place isn't as nice as it once was. Maybe I was foolish to thing that Neclassic's rant will be well recieved but I don't think I was foolish to expect him not to be insulted personally.
 

fisk

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Apr 29, 2008
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"Funny, funny, humor"???? Its neither funny, nor a humor, there is nothing "english" either! If someone (apparently a lot) gets horny watching variety of attributes and items being abused and stuck everywhere by a tiny little triangle, representing someone's sexual past present or dreams - thats what funny is..or at least it was..

ZP is everything but game reviewer, and I don't get the people who dislike him, why get so mad, considering the essence of his work..
 

Cahlee

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Aug 21, 2008
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spudpuffin said:
NewClassic said:
look m8 u need a girl were not here for comparisons to the "old days" were here for 4 minutes of a guy making semi-resonable arguments and nit picking that hilarious!
Let me explain to you why there is a comment section. So people who watch Yahtzee can comment on and/or discuss what they've seen. NewClassic isn't bashing it, he's simply putting forth his opinion in a well constructed and reasonable manner.

This isn't the the praise section. If you really enjoy Yahtzee and think that everything he does is dusted with gold and made of rainbows then I can respect that. Good for you. Now, do everyone else a favour and give them the same courtesy.
 

Galletea

Inexplicably Awesome
Sep 27, 2008
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Omega87 said:
danebot said:
EDIT: Are you kidding me up there with that copy-pasted text wall?

You have something you desperately want people to read, and yet you say nothing. You perched like a sniper waiting for the video to be released so you could soapbox in the first few posts on a site that is full of peple who enjoy the videos. The worst part is, you think it's worth reading, and that you're brillant! Thanks for your comments, but next time I want that kind of counter-opinion in my house I'll just invite a Jehova's witness in for coffee.
Oh my god, most definately qouted for truth. 100% agree.
I'd just like to point out the obvious here. It's a comments page, not a praise page. NewClassic's rant is as valid as your opinion, just more eloquent. And I agree with him. Yahtzee might still be funny, but I'd prefer to hear a little about the actual game.
Edit. Ninja'd. Bugger. With exactly the same comment though, so great minds and all that ;)