Yes it is, and also him never really (to my knowledge) having taken responsibility for it. Also, not sure how concrete some of these statements are, but I believe he was the one to tell the chopper to fly lower.
Now he surely isn't the only Hollywood director who shows negligence to the safety of others while making a movie *cough* Tarantino *cough*, but in his case it killed three people including two kids who likely had no say in the matter. And he kinda just got away with a 'well, you surely fucked that up, huh'. At worst I think Steven Spielberg distanced himself from him after that.
Again, it differs from person to person. In regards to Kevin Spacey I just can't, not yet anyway, which sucks because I really like L.A. Confidential. This has aged with certain people, like when I watch The Naked Gun now I don't feel as awkward about O.J. Simpson.
This isn't just relegated to the LGBTQ crowd, idolizing people is something nearly everyone does, and yes it is a bad thing.
As for the art and artist are two things, if I found out one of my favourite pieces of entertainment was created by someone who either thinks of me or financially supports people who think of me as lesser people, I'd feel a little peeved to say the least.