General Movies, Music, Web Show, and TV News Thread

FakeSympathy

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Oh...Disney is doing this. That explains the dumb superhero angle. They're playing it safe and hoping it doesn't cost too much controversy. Who you're going to offend Disney, the Chinese government? They already dropped your sorry asses and along with the rest of Hollywood. The ultra alt-right, kkk, Neo-nazis, and Fox News? That didn't stop you with the Beyonce's special movie, or that episode of the Proud Family. Hell, that didn't stop Proud Family back then when it aired in the early 2000 on your channel.
And they already tried to appeal to China with Mulan live-action. And failed HARD with terrible understanding of culture and history. I would've been pissed too if I was a Chinese govt. official.
 

FakeSympathy

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The problem with the first adsption, is that it just moved too slow, and was only adapting when the manga was not finished at the time. Also, the animation and art direction is ugly and too bright. I noticed the first time digital composition was used, and it shows. It's one of those early animes from the 2000s that did not do this method well. Tell them Bennett:


Bob can just watch the opening and endings, and that's it. Just get straight to the Ultimate after that, if you choose to do.
There is an third option: Hellsing Ultimate Abridged. I haven't laughed that hard when Alucard said "I'm gonna FUCK the fear turkey!"
 

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, I disagree with the whole of it (not to mention with the delivery - I don't have much patience for yt histrionics and had to skip forwards to get to the point a dozen times). My graphic standards for anime are admittedly a bit low, as I've been introduced to them by the lamest shovelwares France could buy in the 80s, so while I don't care a lot, I didn't find the image/animation sub-par in relation to my generous par.
For the record, Bennett has gotten better about this for years, but this wasn't even him at his worst. He's even apologize for a lot of crappy pulled back between 2013 and 2015 and regrets certain episodes, or those were he acted like a jackass. It shows a lot more serious now. You'll still crack a joke every now and then, but it's not like the old days where you just acted like an angry or obnoxiously snobbish critic.

But also, Hellsing is completely silly and stupid and is merely a dreamlike splortchathon with nonsensical plot twists and excuses and hilariously pompous monologues, so 1) I don't see how one could see any fault in that, it's simply glorious, 2) I don't see how one can nitpick graphically on that, it's not the sixtine chapel, it's cheesy vampires repeatedly exploding each others and (for some reason) themselves (for some reason) several times in a row, 3) the OVA is a bit too self-serious when it comes to that, with its almost genuine attempt at edgy vampire nazi horror gothic philosophical drama, and in a way I had more sympathy for the original's lighter nonsense - it's a healthier brand of cringe (apart maybe for the random lesbian licky seduction, but that's just a spike of cringe in a generally cartoonisher cringe than the OVA's gritty nazi cringe), and 4) most of that video's complains apply to the OVA because it's just the definition of Hellsing (the OVA is barely more coherent, and its delirium monologues are even longer - shut up Major we got the point with the first sentence).

Also yes, the original goes completely off rails as it catches up with the manga, and that's usually a disastrous situation (Gantz, Game of Thrones, etc), but given how equally stupid the manga is, it's hard to argue there's a genuine narrative loss there.

So I stand my point. Both versions are nonsensical fun, one is brighter and more cartoonish than the other that takes itself more seriously. But both are dumb as hell, and separated by a slight nuance in tone. In my view they complement each other well, and I don't think I would have enjoyed the OVA that much without the semi-unintended humor of the first version.
It's fine if you like it for that, but it doesn't excuse either a lack of trying, nor the lack of time and budget. While Ultimate is a bit more serious and similar to the manga, there is self-awareness on both ends. The Ultimate does regular humor and dark humor better. The characters are fleshed out better, and you get the goofy, over the top, action. The manga and Ultimate just does it better. The only thing I don't like about manga or Ultimate, is the dumb ass pull that Walter is the traitor. None of this is hinted that in either version. Ultimate tries to be a little better about this, but it still comes off as pulling something out of thin air at the last minute. Ultimate also didn't waste my time.
 
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Bob_McMillan

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An American Born Chinese teen boy living in US struggles with racism and cultural differences. One night he wishes to be a white male, which comes true. But he soon finds out there are prices to be paid.

The premise sounds weird, and there are lots of Chinese mythology involved, but it delivers a heart-felt message, and not a superhero bs
That is truly bizzare. I'm almost amazed at how obvious and lazy the direction they went with is.
 

Absent

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The boring one
the dumb ass pull
Yes, it's one of the things that makes me find the original anima and the OVA all in all equivalent in terms of plot randomness (another one is the nature of the Major).

I also don't think that ultimate does humor better. Firstly, I'm note sure that I find the humor in hellsing (all versions) where the authors intended it : I enjoy the ridiculousness of many things that I suspect are being played straight, and may possibly be less ridiculous in japanese than in the english (written or audio) translations. The lenghty taunts before during after the fights, for instance, are so bloated with delirious man/monster/dog metaphors, they are a joke in itself. But also, there's a kind of humour that I truly dislike in anime/manga, it's the switch to "comedic stylized design" during the jokes-haha-we-are-having-a-funny-moment. The original anime spares me this.

Also Ultimate did waste my time (and I'm generally not picky about that, I like films to take their sweet time narratively). Seriously, that Major monologue about war, I felt like it took up half of the serie's running time. I barely exaggerate - I was checking the timeline and didn't believe he would keep rambling till the end of the episode.

But anyway, the fact that my appreciation of Hellsing comes from a slightly ironically distanced angle explains my fondness for the clunkier original anime. Precisely because it tries less, I'm more forgiving with its material than with the slightly tryhard OVA (or even manga). But all three have a different approach to the same roughly material.

There is an third option: Hellsing Ultimate Abridged.
Yep. Best of all worlds.
 
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also don't think that ultimate does humor better. Firstly, I'm note sure that I find the humor in hellsing (all versions) where the authors intended it : I enjoy the ridiculousness of many things that I suspect are being played straight, and may possibly be less ridiculous in japanese than in the english (written or audio) translations. The lenghty taunts before during after the fights, for instance, are so bloated with delirious man/monster/dog metaphors, they are a joke in itself. But also, there's a kind of humour that I truly dislike in anime/manga, it's the switch to "comedic stylized design" during the jokes-haha-we-are-having-a-funny-moment. The original anime spares me this.
Ymmv. I usually didn't mind it. Sure the first anime doesn't have this, but only some of it's humor hits from the English dubbing side (Jan Valentine). It's too dry and just not there. Hellsing Ultimate has one of the best dubs in anime ever. They brought all the voice actors back, and they're all on full cylinders!


Also Ultimate did waste my time (and I'm generally not picky about that, I like films to take their sweet time narratively). Seriously, that Major monologue about war, I felt like it took up half of the serie's running time. I barely exaggerate - I was checking the timeline and didn't believe he would keep rambling till the end of the episode.
The Major's monologue is one of the best parts and I had no issues with it. There's a reason why a lot of fans like it or like to make fun of it lightly. There's a reason why there's that Smash Brothers parody comic, that does the speech almost frame by frame from the panels in the manga, but replaces the words with Smash Brothers terms. The abridged version does shortened up, but both are awesome and hilarious for their own reasons. I rather listen to the Major babble on about war for 8 minutes, than Trump or any of the right wing nuts about their dicks, clits, and pathetic, insecure, egos.


But anyway, the fact that my appreciation of Hellsing comes from a slightly ironically distanced angle explains my fondness for the clunkier original anime. Precisely because it tries less, I'm more forgiving with its material than with the slightly tryhard OVA (or even manga). But all three have a different approach to the same roughly material.
I usually don't mind clunkier or lower budgeted animation, but there has to be effort done for these with the story or characters. And if you are going for trashy action or going gonzo over the top, it has to be done better than that. The first anime failed at that for me. If I need over the top action that doesn't take itself too seriously, and still be fun, I got plenty of other better options. Gunsmith Cats (for a three episode ova, there is an incredible level of detail done in the action and animation), Outlaw Star, Kill La Kill, Promare, etc. I can go on all day.
 
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There is an third option: Hellsing Ultimate Abridged. I haven't laughed that hard when Alucard said "I'm gonna FUCK the fear turkey!"

Yes, I am endlessly amused by Integra trolling maxwell Anderson merely by the suggestion of nailing complaints to a door, mostly because of how fucking petty it is on both sides.
 
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Absent

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Sure the first anime doesn't have this, but only some of it's humor hits from the English dubbing side (Jan Valentine). It's too dry and just not there. Hellsing Ultimate has one of the best dubs in anime ever.
I usually don't even check the dubbed versions. I had just a couple versions of fan-made subs. So I had the original voice tones. As for the rest I can't say I cared much about the litterature aspect of it ("and you think that you are a monster but you are the dog of a monster while i am the monster of a human that is to a dog what a monster's dog is about the human of a dog's monster and not even the monster that a dog would eat but the dog that a human would eat like a monster muhaha" "- that's what you think but you are merely to a dog what a dog is to a monster who's...").

I usually don't mind clunkier or lower budgeted animation, but there has to be effort done of these with the story or characters. And if you are going for trashy action or going gonzo over the top, it has to be done better than that.
Oh I was really really fine with the "and then they all asplode" *pours a can of tomato juice on the cells and calls it a day* work ethic. It was just part of the delight to me. ☺

Thinking of it, I should publish superhero comics where absolutely all panels (fights, exposition, etc) are just those white clouds with little color stars, onomatoeas and fists and feet poking out.
 

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had just a couple versions of fan-made subs. So I had the original voice tones.
Nothing against the voice actors on the Japanese side, but that just made the show less interesting.


As for the rest I can't say I cared much about the litterature aspect of it ("and you think that you are a monster but you are the dog of a monster while i am the monster of a human that is to a dog what a monster's dog is about the human of a dog's monster and not even the monster that a dog would eat but the dog that a human would eat like a monster muhaha" "- that's what you think but you are merely to a dog what a dog is to a monster who's...").
It doesn't get that exaggerated or pretentious, but I see where you're coming from. You want real pretentiousness? Look at the original Eva, the parts of MHA that tried to downplay or make light of bullying and bad teaching, Naruto, or Shaman King (manga/2022 anime).
 

CriticalGaming

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Can anyone have an original fucking idea please!? Just one?

Here I'll give you one for free! A sci-fi love story where a lonely parts recycler builds
an android companion out of spare "junk" parts. When he accidently installs a mistakenly disguarded military AI Core, his companion becomes more capable than he expected. He is murdered when the government comes knocking and he refuses to return the part, so she goes out for revenge. Ultimately she returns the favor by rebuilding him.

Or how about a rebooting those cheerleading movies "Bring it on!", except it's a skate boarding crew and competition? Staring Jason Statham for some reason.
 
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Gordon_4

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Yes, I am endlessly amused by Integra trolling maxwell Anderson merely by the suggestion of nailing complaints to a door, mostly because of how fucking petty it is on both sides.
Anderson gets some of the best lines in that, I fuckin' swear.

"You don't have to follow orders when your boss is being a daft ****"

"Don't weep for the stupid, you'll be crying all day"

Oh man that show is a fucking ride.
 

Bob_McMillan

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The Flash? Who's that? Anyway, here's some Batman. You guys love that shit right? Oh and uhhh, what do we have... Ah, Superman! We got Superman! Wait... Oh, Superman's cousin, we have Superman's cousin. Hey look, more Batman!

Anyway. I will unashamedly watch this just for the Batman stuff (well, probably not through any... formal channels). I'm not even a fan of Keaton's version, in fact quite a lot of the nostalgia bait is straight up off putting, but I can't say no to the glider cape.
 

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The Flash? Who's that? Anyway, here's some Batman. You guys love that shit right? Oh and uhhh, what do we have... Ah, Superman! We got Superman! Wait... Oh, Superman's cousin, we have Superman's cousin. Hey look, more Batman!

Anyway. I will unashamedly watch this just for the Batman stuff (well, probably not through any... formal channels). I'm not even a fan of Keaton's version, in fact quite a lot of the nostalgia bait is straight up off putting, but I can't say no to the glider cape.
 

Piscian

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The Flash? Who's that? Anyway, here's some Batman. You guys love that shit right? Oh and uhhh, what do we have... Ah, Superman! We got Superman! Wait... Oh, Superman's cousin, we have Superman's cousin. Hey look, more Batman!

Anyway. I will unashamedly watch this just for the Batman stuff (well, probably not through any... formal channels). I'm not even a fan of Keaton's version, in fact quite a lot of the nostalgia bait is straight up off putting, but I can't say no to the glider cape.
I really.. really hate being that guy, but like this..is..wb. We have zero evidence that this isn't another giant clusterfuck being smeared over with hype trailers.

On a more contained, but concerned note, I cant be the only one that noticed the CGI ...off. Like not quite ps2 cut scene, but its sooo obvious that his action scenes are all cgi and the suits been redone a couple times in post. Theres a brief second in the trailer thats practical, I think hes just standing in the batcave and it looks nothing like his weird ultraslim bright red bird neck suit.

I don't want it spoiled for me, but the flash 2 betrayal twist seems increasingly evident. Im assuming flash 2 cant accept that his mom hasd to die and flips out. All the action in the trailer seems like an early or mid movie battle.