Then what will we do all day? At the current rate of drinking and smoking, I'll have lung cancer and cirrhosis of the liver by next Friday; the spider is the only thing keeping me from a more rapid and boring death!Kill it with fire.
Find more spiders and burn them to death as well.Then what will we do all day? At the current rate of drinking and smoking, I'll have lung cancer and cirrhosis of the liver by next Friday; the spider is the only thing keeping me from a more rapid and boring death!
Just keep calling him 'the Spider', and then serenade him with this:Suggestions?
I'd generally agree, but my girlfriend's "every life is precious" mentality has rubbed off on me over the past few years (and yes, I can appreciate the irony of our killing bugs to feed a bug.) Her signature move WAS swatting a fly a half-dozen times because she "doesn't want it to suffer," (you've never seen flatter dead flies than on our patio,) but now, it's a love tap to incapacitate followed by a sacrifice to the spider gods.Find more spiders and burn them to death as well.
The entire history of mankind can be viewed as one long struggle against the bug menace. We all must do our part for the war of survival.
Done!Just keep calling him 'the Spider', and then serenade him with this:
Edit: also, that is one cool lookimg spider and web.
She probably wouldn't like my position of "as every life is precious and yet we cannot survive without consuming life, there is no moral consumption and we might as well eat and kill what we want", then.I'd generally agree, but my girlfriend's "every life is precious" mentality has rubbed off on me over the past few years (and yes, I can appreciate the irony of our killing bugs to feed a bug.)
Hans.Oddly enough, we’ve not named him yet; he’s just “the spider.” Suggestions?
This is shameless pandering and you know it! I shall begrudgingly enjoy.
Is that one of those ironic names, as the spider is all Leggs, no Hans?Hans.
When faced with a spider or other unseemly critter that goes bonk in the night, it is considered good form for to call on Hans to get ze flammenwerfer.Is that one of those ironic names, as the spider is all Leggs, no Hans?
Oh dear, no, not that. Worse.
Name her 'She who will crawl into your pants.'Started to post this in the “Goofy Stuff You And Your Sig Other Do” thread, but figured it might be fitting here. Given quarantine has left us with little else to do other than stare at each other, my girlfriend and I adopted this yellow garden spider that took up residence right outside our backyard gate. We try to find insects on our patio or around the pool, half-swat them, toss them into his web, then watch in awe as nature happens. The few guests we've had are genuinely perplexed when we're so excited to half-kill a fly or beetle and toss it to this guy; quote: "you guys really do this all day?" Yes. Yes, we do. Oddly enough, we’ve not named him yet; he’s just “the spider.” Suggestions?
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