Xbox 360 Players Rated "Best In The Bedroom"

Fanghawk

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Feb 17, 2011
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Xbox 360 Players Rated "Best In The Bedroom"

A recent study has found correlations between your gaming and all the fantastic sex you might be having.

As gamers, there are a variety of reasons why you might prefer one console over another. Perhaps you enjoy the exclusive titles, or favor a particular hardware feature. What you probably don't think about is its bearing on your sex life, because while sex and gaming aren't mutually exclusive, they normally don't require each other either. Yet that's exactly the purpose of a survey that polled 1,747 participants on the sexual performance of their gaming partners. It's not hard-hitting science, but the results make for an entertaining read, especially if you're an Xbox 360 owner learning that you ended up on top (so to speak).

The study, sponsored by Voucher Codes Pro, was conducted in the UK to evaluate external influences on relationships. Participants were asked to name their partner's most-played gaming system before ranking sexual performance from "Excellent" to "Below Average". According to the results, half of the unwitting gamers were considered "Good" or "Average", while 54% of Xbox 360 players were "Good" or better. In fact, 22% of Xbox-supporting partners obtained the highest possible ranking for being total freaks in the sheets.

"So, according to our survey, it seems that if you own an Xbox 360, you can give yourself a pat on the back for bedroom performance," said Voucher Codes Pro's George Charles. "Well, one in five of you can at least. For other gamers it definitely seems there's room for improvement. And despite it being an undeniably good game, perhaps Bioshock Infinite doesn't act as a natural performance enhancer!"

Assuming you don't own an Xbox 360, what does the study say about your sexual performance? First of all, Wii players can relax, since they were actually a close second behind the 360. The lowest performances, interestingly, were awarded to none other than PC gamers. Only 3% of gaming's Master Race were especially proficient at bumping uglies, and their above-average figures didn't fare much better. On the bright side, 52% of gamers strike a good balance between their sexual and gaming needs. That said, 11% of participants thought their relationship needed less sex and more gaming.

In case it wasn't clear, these results probably shouldn't be taken very seriously. Charles even notes that the definition of "bedroom performance" is wide open to interpretation, which means the study doesn't cut the mustard where scientific accuracy is concerned. In other words, your gaming hobbies probably don't have anything to say about your sexual performance that you aren't already aware of.

Unless you're a games journalist that is; everybody knows belt buckles just undo themselves when one of us enters the room.

Image: <a href=http://www.sync-blog.com/sync/2011/07/doritos-says-girls-enjoy-online-gaming-more-than-sex-do-you-agree.html>Sync.ca

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Ed130 The Vanguard

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Sep 10, 2008
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That was one of the most unscientific studies I've ever had the misfortune to read, mainly because:

1) it was an online survey, ie the same place that voted EA 'The worst US company of 2012' and named Kim Jong Un as TIME person of the year.

2) It was run by Doritos of all people.

3) It was created promote a new dip on Facebook.

That said, asking female gamers what they do after sex is an odd way to promote a corn chip dip of all things.
 

kouriichi

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Sep 5, 2010
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I knew it! Laugh at me for not being able to mod skyrim will you?

Well i'll be laugh'in harder when your woman is thinking about me! And by woman, i mean hand! Yeah! Take that pc gamers!

Wait, no... that didnt turn out like i wanted. Forget i ever said anything.
 

Draconalis

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Sep 11, 2008
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Fanghawk said:
The lowest performances, interestingly, were awarded to none other than PC gamers. Only 3% of gaming's Master Race were especially proficient at bumping uglies, and their above-average figures didn't fare much better.
It's because PC gamers have the easiest level of access to porn. That's my theory and I'm sticking to it. Who needs a woman when you can just tab out of the Witcher 2 after a few in game sex scenes for a date with Rosie Palm and her five sisters to the good ol Porntube?

Fanghawk said:
Unless you're a games journalist that is; everybody knows belt buckles just undo themselves when one of us enters the room.
That made me laugh... hard.
 

TimeLord

For the Emperor!
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Aug 15, 2008
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Due to recently aquired data by myself. I can confirm that this article is 100% accurate!
 

Hagi

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It's fairly obvious what's going on here.

PC gaming is dying, according to sources that swear they're very reliable. Thus, the PC gaming master race, in a bid of desperation is trying to procreate as much as possible. You don't have time for good sex when the continuation of your very species is on the line. This is not a time for enjoyment. This is a time for PC gaming master babies to be born.

XBox360 owners may feel pretty good now, but the PC gaming master baby boom is just beginning. In several years we shall flood elementary school with our offspring, already fragging away in Crysis 5 with the obviously superior mouse. Years after that high-schools around the world will be home to hordes of PC gaming master adolescents, already competitively gaming in MMOs, RTS and other obviously superior titles of which consoles can only create pale imitations. Until finally... they shall become full fledged Master Gamers and PC gaming will become unstoppable!

It's not too late to join us you know...
 

Strazdas

Robots will replace your job
May 28, 2011
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Escapist, i dont come here to remind myself of my sexual failures.
 

Scrustle

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Apr 30, 2011
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Hahaha! Oh yeah, this is definitely not bullshit.

If you take a look at their site you can see they're actually offering vouchers for game consoles. Top of the list, xBox 360. Right underneath is Wii.
 

Smooth Operator

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Oct 5, 2010
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Study based on completely personal opinions put together by an advertising site clambering for views... well that is a legit study if I ever did see one.
 

StormShaun

The Basement has been unleashed!
Feb 1, 2009
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I'm so glad that I play all three consoles now.
Now as someone said before ...

Only if I could talk to girls. XD

Oh well the time will come.
Though this article got a good chuckle out of me.