7 year old commits suicide
- Thread starter HardkorSB
- Start date
The kid is weak.
I know you're going to take that at face value, so let me explain. It's not the kid's fault that he is weak. He's been depressed by the bullying and the the fact that his parents are no longer married. But divorce and bullying alone does not make people want to kill themselves, believe me, I went through the same thing at the same age. There has to be an underlying problem somewhere. My theory is on the parents. They've obviously never taught the kid how to handle hardship or depression, which is a vital thing to know. Thus making him mentally weak.
In short, not his fault, I blame the parents and the bullies. Mostly the parents.
Of course, my assertion is entirerly based on the linked article. None of us know the whole story.
I know you're going to take that at face value, so let me explain. It's not the kid's fault that he is weak. He's been depressed by the bullying and the the fact that his parents are no longer married. But divorce and bullying alone does not make people want to kill themselves, believe me, I went through the same thing at the same age. There has to be an underlying problem somewhere. My theory is on the parents. They've obviously never taught the kid how to handle hardship or depression, which is a vital thing to know. Thus making him mentally weak.
In short, not his fault, I blame the parents and the bullies. Mostly the parents.
Of course, my assertion is entirerly based on the linked article. None of us know the whole story.
Wow... now I'm depressed. I have a cousin who's about that age, if he... no... I don't even wanna think about it...
The worst part of it all is: this could have been avoided.
The worst part of it all is: this could have been avoided.
This seems to be a case of a child taking extreme steps to grab attention, only to have it go horribly wrong. There have been several other cases similar to this, all involving hanging.
A child is going to an extreme length to grab attention to themselves, but (being a child) failing to fully consider the implications of the action -- firstly, that no one is seeing it, and second, that they won't be able to benefit from "how sad they'll all be when I'm gone."
Don't mistake this for not having sympathy for the child, though! I simply don't think people need to ascribe the kind of forethought or specific intent that they are. "Cry for help" suicide attempts can accidentally result in actual suicide (a friend of mine died on the phone to my house after his "cry" backfired).
To properly handle problems like this, we really need to address the core issue. Counseling is extremely important, but also making sure to impart as much perspective as we can. This is not a child calculating the possibility of suicide. This is a child not fully grasping the finality of his choices, and the result of many other possible factors making him that desperate for attention...
A child is going to an extreme length to grab attention to themselves, but (being a child) failing to fully consider the implications of the action -- firstly, that no one is seeing it, and second, that they won't be able to benefit from "how sad they'll all be when I'm gone."
Don't mistake this for not having sympathy for the child, though! I simply don't think people need to ascribe the kind of forethought or specific intent that they are. "Cry for help" suicide attempts can accidentally result in actual suicide (a friend of mine died on the phone to my house after his "cry" backfired).
To properly handle problems like this, we really need to address the core issue. Counseling is extremely important, but also making sure to impart as much perspective as we can. This is not a child calculating the possibility of suicide. This is a child not fully grasping the finality of his choices, and the result of many other possible factors making him that desperate for attention...
As depressing as this is it's not all that uncommon. Very young children do understand the world around them and that chaos is happening in their lives, however are unable to handle to emotional stress unless there is someone there to help assist (usually a parents, guardian, sibling...). Especially in cases of divorce where the parents are already focused on one huge task, the child sometimes ends up being pushed aside (obviously this is not always the case. In my families case my father paid much attention to my personal needs).
Children are egocentric. This means that they believe that the world and events happen due to them. Often times if an adult or someone is feeling sad a child will give them their favorite toy. Their thought process is 'well this toy cheers ME up, it should for this person as well'/ This is normal behavior. So when something bad happens, a child automatically thinks its their fault. It has NOTHING to do with low self esteem, although that might also be an additional and more dangerous factor.
Bullys as well think in the same fashion. A child bully doesn't necessarily mean what he's doing, he cant fully comprehend. Once again the child is egocentric. And thus they can't fully understand the end result, besides their own personal self gain (whether that be friends, popularity, or self worth). A bully might have problems going on in their own home, or personal life as well, and the only outlet is releasing their anger or feelings out on another, usually smaller or weaker individual, especially when they feel threatened. Of course this by no means makes the situation okay, however it does open up to some solutions for the child, and does feature some emotional problems that the child might have dealing with social activity and family.
Im speaking for very young children. As the child get older these actions tend to remain if not dealt with, and must be treated carefully. Many parents however don't want to hear that their child is a bully, or if they feel as if their child is being bullied, rather then assess the situation with clear thought they attack the school. This is not to say the parents or school are at fault.
Long story short, children as very sensitive to the world around them, an act accordingly. Suicide for a young child is nothing new, and it as well as bullying will keep getting larger if we as adults, parents, teachers, siblings, so on and so forth don't start paying attention and teaching the children how to have a healthy outlet, and to explain clearly to them what is going on in their lives. Children aren't stupid by any means.
Children are egocentric. This means that they believe that the world and events happen due to them. Often times if an adult or someone is feeling sad a child will give them their favorite toy. Their thought process is 'well this toy cheers ME up, it should for this person as well'/ This is normal behavior. So when something bad happens, a child automatically thinks its their fault. It has NOTHING to do with low self esteem, although that might also be an additional and more dangerous factor.
Bullys as well think in the same fashion. A child bully doesn't necessarily mean what he's doing, he cant fully comprehend. Once again the child is egocentric. And thus they can't fully understand the end result, besides their own personal self gain (whether that be friends, popularity, or self worth). A bully might have problems going on in their own home, or personal life as well, and the only outlet is releasing their anger or feelings out on another, usually smaller or weaker individual, especially when they feel threatened. Of course this by no means makes the situation okay, however it does open up to some solutions for the child, and does feature some emotional problems that the child might have dealing with social activity and family.
Im speaking for very young children. As the child get older these actions tend to remain if not dealt with, and must be treated carefully. Many parents however don't want to hear that their child is a bully, or if they feel as if their child is being bullied, rather then assess the situation with clear thought they attack the school. This is not to say the parents or school are at fault.
Long story short, children as very sensitive to the world around them, an act accordingly. Suicide for a young child is nothing new, and it as well as bullying will keep getting larger if we as adults, parents, teachers, siblings, so on and so forth don't start paying attention and teaching the children how to have a healthy outlet, and to explain clearly to them what is going on in their lives. Children aren't stupid by any means.
I don?t know why there?s a thread on this, since there?s nothing to discuss. This is sad, shit happens, move on.
No, seriously. Suicides of complete strangers that don?t affect us happen every day, and complaining about bullying or poor parenting or retarded parenting or the failed child care system isn?t going to solve anything.
No, seriously. Suicides of complete strangers that don?t affect us happen every day, and complaining about bullying or poor parenting or retarded parenting or the failed child care system isn?t going to solve anything.
John Donne... Cute.RazadaMk2 said:
You can crusade all you like to make it seem like this kid was perfectly normal for offing himself, but he wasn't. You have no proof that this kid was NOT offered all the support he needed, so why make the assumption that he was left alone.
Why do I feel like all the anti-bullying crusaders were never bullied?
I was bullied to a pretty substantial degree, and it made me a better person. My parents got a divorce when I was young and it taught me about life. I was emotionally stable enough to handle it, and this kid was NOT.
Stop playing the blame game from the top of your altruistic high horse and just accept this for what it truly is... a freak accident.
I handled my parents' divorce, because I was only 6 months old. But bullying? That wrecked me. I ended up going to two different psychiatrists because I was getting bullied at school, and then went home to be verbally abused by my stepfather. You may say that verbal abuse is not the same thing, but all that changes is who is doing the bullying. Saying that "I was bullied, and it made me better, so anyone saying that bullying is bad has never been bullied" is an insult to anyone who's actually suffered from it. It seems you didn't actually suffer, but rather had it happen to you. There is a difference.TomLikesGuitar said:
On-topic: This is just...depressing. I've been in that state of mind before, but not until I was 21. At seven? Wow...
But you're admitting that the damage from bullying is circumstantial, and nearly impossible to judge... ESPECIALLY if the bullied person is repressing their emotions.thebobmaster said:
I just don't think anyone is necessarily at fault here except the kid. I'm not saying he intentionally was messed up... it just happens. The world is a messed up place.