A portal question

[effilctar]

Everyone loves a portal question.

So, if I put a portal just above the floor, and one on the floor, then I dive headfirst, grab my legs before they go through the portal, and begin to climb up my own body, what happens?

 

[Baby Eater]

you couldn't you'd just be going up the portal more. heres one for you what if during that the portal closed?

 

[Neonbob]

The sheer force of hilarity in the universe would result in you tearing yourself in half, and as you get what has just happened to you, you get a burst of speed, and begin climbing up yourself so fast that you pass your legs, and begin to unravel your intestines in a futile attempt to keep yourself from falling.
That goes on until you die from blood loss.
^_^

 

[Asciotes]

you continue falling. Terminal velocity is significantly faster that the speed you can climb at.

 

[BonsaiK]

The actual answer:

Every time you climb your arms would move closer but your legs would move the same distance further away from your arms, counteracting each grasp. So you would never actually make any progress. The only way to successfully "climb" in this scenario would be if you could move the distance between the two portals themselves.

In the meantime you just keep falling, obviously.

 

[Cliff_m85]

What happens if you put a slinky in a portal that is connected to the wall and floor?

 

[Baby Eater]

The sheer force of hilarity in the universe would result in you tearing yourself in half, and as you get what has just happened to you, you get a burst of speed, and begin climbing up yourself so fast that you pass your legs, and begin to unravel your intestines in a futile attempt to keep yourself from falling.
That goes on until you die from blood loss.
^_^

that disturbing sentence followed by the smiley just made my respect for you multiply by some unknown number. i though it was my job to be the disturbing sadist here

 

[Knight Templar]

Nothing, apart from you falling. Its like trying to catch your feet when the portals are just a little too far apart, as you move forward your target does also, the end resoult is you look stupid.

 

[Frogman54]

No, the true question is. What would happen if you put one portal on a wall, then shot the other portal on a plywood plank lets say, then moved the portal on the plywood into the one on the wall so one portal was inside the other.

 

[grimsprice]

you continue falling. Terminal velocity is significantly faster that the speed you can climb at.

You can't climb on yourself. Everytime you pull, your feet come with you, pulling you ... in fact, no where.

 

[The_Chief]

The sheer force of hilarity in the universe would result in you tearing yourself in half, and as you get what has just happened to you, you get a burst of speed, and begin climbing up yourself so fast that you pass your legs, and begin to unravel your intestines in a futile attempt to keep yourself from falling.
That goes on until you die from blood loss.
^_^

that disturbing sentence followed by the smiley just made my respect for you multiply by some unknown number. i though it was my job to be the disturbing sadist here

you obviously havent been here long...Neon is like sadist raptor jedi zombie physicist rockstar jesus zeus.

 

[grimsprice]

No, the true question is. What would happen if you put one portal on a wall, then shot the other portal on a plywood plank lets say, then moved the portal on the plywood into the one on the wall so one portal was inside the other.

You can't move portals once they activate.

 

[FROGGEman2]

Wouldn't you just keep falling?

No, the true question is. What would happen if you put one portal on a wall, then shot the other portal on a plywood plank lets say, then moved the portal on the plywood into the one on the wall so one portal was inside the other.

Your name is disturbingly similar to mine.

 

[Baby Eater]

The sheer force of hilarity in the universe would result in you tearing yourself in half, and as you get what has just happened to you, you get a burst of speed, and begin climbing up yourself so fast that you pass your legs, and begin to unravel your intestines in a futile attempt to keep yourself from falling.
That goes on until you die from blood loss.
^_^

that disturbing sentence followed by the smiley just made my respect for you multiply by some unknown number. i though it was my job to be the disturbing sadist here

you obviously havent been here long...Neon is like sadist raptor jedi zombie physicist rockstar jesus zeus.

yeah but ive said some pretty fucked up shit and until now neon's only said sarcastic comebacks.ive only been here since like august >>

 

[effilctar]

No, the true question is. What would happen if you put one portal on a wall, then shot the other portal on a plywood plank lets say, then moved the portal on the plywood into the one on the wall so one portal was inside the other.

Your hijacking attempt failed, young man.

 

[MiserableOldGit]

You'd keep falling through like some kind of meat daisy chain.

 

[MiserableOldGit]

The sheer force of hilarity in the universe would result in you tearing yourself in half, and as you get what has just happened to you, you get a burst of speed, and begin climbing up yourself so fast that you pass your legs, and begin to unravel your intestines in a futile attempt to keep yourself from falling.
That goes on until you die from blood loss.
^_^

that disturbing sentence followed by the smiley just made my respect for you multiply by some unknown number. i though it was my job to be the disturbing sadist here

you obviously havent been here long...Neon is like sadist raptor jedi zombie physicist rockstar jesus zeus.

I bet you fellas use words like 'random' a lot in conversation. People who talk like this are the sanest, most boring individuals in the world. On the up side, you keep those people that print 'you don't have to be mad to work here but it helps' stickers in business.

 

[similar.squirrel]

You'd wind up inside your own rectum, cursing yourself fervently for not doing something more worthwhile with the miraculous device.

 

[orangebandguy]

You keep falling until you die of blood loss or something.

 

[Inverse Skies]

I get very confused without a visual aid, those sorts of things just sort of screw with my head a bit. Someone draw a picture please!