I have a question. If this is simple a question of being personable and how other people will perceive you, why does it matter if that person has a penis or a vagina? I can understand this whole "I'm afraid they'll think I'm an idiot so I'll be quiet thing." However, I'm right on the dividing line being introvert and extrovert (at least according to that Myer-Briggs test), so if I can think of something to say or if someone strikes up a conversation with me first, I'll do it. However, to me, it doesn't matter if that person is male or female if it's just for the purposes of being sociable.
Maybe this is a bit simplistic. After all, attraction cannot be factored out especially for people like you and me. (I'm assuming you are in your 20s or 30s and therefore are looking for a relationship if you aren't already in one.) However, sometimes, it's just nice to talk to people, you know, one human being to the next. Being female, I can say that when a guy randomly talks to me, the vast majority of the time, I don't think they're trying to hit on me and they don't creep me out. (There are exceptions, but I'm talking about average dudes.) In fact, I appreciate it when a person will spark up a conversation with me randomly. People are meant to interact with other people; we're social creatures. The same goes when another woman sparks a conversation with me. It makes my day a little better, even if it's just a conversation about the weather.
If you want advice, the more people you talk to, the easier it becomes to talk to people. I would start off with people who don't intimidate you as much, so for you, I would say other guys or older people. Seriously, the elderly are the best people to talk to. They don't give a fuck anymore so they'll talk to just about anyone and they have the best stories. Strike up a conversation at a check out line or in an elevator or something. It's not easy, I know, but once you build up your confidence in this area a bit, it'll help.
Maybe this is a bit simplistic. After all, attraction cannot be factored out especially for people like you and me. (I'm assuming you are in your 20s or 30s and therefore are looking for a relationship if you aren't already in one.) However, sometimes, it's just nice to talk to people, you know, one human being to the next. Being female, I can say that when a guy randomly talks to me, the vast majority of the time, I don't think they're trying to hit on me and they don't creep me out. (There are exceptions, but I'm talking about average dudes.) In fact, I appreciate it when a person will spark up a conversation with me randomly. People are meant to interact with other people; we're social creatures. The same goes when another woman sparks a conversation with me. It makes my day a little better, even if it's just a conversation about the weather.
If you want advice, the more people you talk to, the easier it becomes to talk to people. I would start off with people who don't intimidate you as much, so for you, I would say other guys or older people. Seriously, the elderly are the best people to talk to. They don't give a fuck anymore so they'll talk to just about anyone and they have the best stories. Strike up a conversation at a check out line or in an elevator or something. It's not easy, I know, but once you build up your confidence in this area a bit, it'll help.