And there was me thinking that the power was in the ceremony and symbolism. Still, I was about to type something about 'Baby stake fry-up' But I just can't do it. Barbeque maybe?kommando367 said:
An evil magic baby suddenly births out of you; what would you do with it and what would you name it?
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Please, we all know that his true name is Stormageddon, Dark Lord of All.monkey_man said:But in all honestly I would name it something regular. Then you'd have the demonic overlord "Tim" or something
gh.
OT: Holy shit, I'm a dude and I just gave birth! Someone call the Daily Mail!
Then, since it is an evil baby, I shall send it to the Evil Baby Orphanage.
Just how evil are we talking about?
If my child simply act naughty and rebellious to the point he/ she want to rule the world then I will accept him/ her just the way he/ she (I will still treat her nicely).
Beside who wouldn't want front row sit seeing your child conquering world domianation?
However if the child is evil as in psychotic to the point of harming anyone including me (like Michael Myers or Damien) then I will be powerless to whatever is nessecary is need to restrain my psychotic child.
As for the name, it would simply be any normal human names as oppose to some evil name related.
If my child simply act naughty and rebellious to the point he/ she want to rule the world then I will accept him/ her just the way he/ she (I will still treat her nicely).
Beside who wouldn't want front row sit seeing your child conquering world domianation?
However if the child is evil as in psychotic to the point of harming anyone including me (like Michael Myers or Damien) then I will be powerless to whatever is nessecary is need to restrain my psychotic child.
As for the name, it would simply be any normal human names as oppose to some evil name related.
I'm assuming it's definitely evil because 1. I'm a man. Men don't have babies. and 2. I've never had sex. Now that second one shouldn't matter in the face of 1, but it helps to rule out something like "I'm secretly some kind of alien sleeper agent gathering genetic material for hybrid making" or "I'm actually a humanoid worm and can fertilize eggs i take during sex...somehow" which are pretty stupid explanations anyway, but then the whole situation is stupid, so I'm going with "virgin-born butt baby is satan" and proceeding as usual.
What is usual. Selling that little bastard to science, duh. I hate kids, a lot. Like, in the "I'd rather shoot a syringe full of flesh eating bacteria, Ebola, bubonic plague, and AIDS right into my eyeball than ever be a dad" level of hate, so there is no way this kid was being kept, demonic origins or not. So let the nerds pay me a crapton of cash, then irradiate, dissect, shot, burn, and whatever else the wanna do to the little bastard.
Assuming that I can't prove that I just gave man birth to a satan spawn, dump it off on some chick I know who really wants a kid. Of course I'd mention the whole "Oh, by the way, this thing may be the anti-christ. Like, seriously check with a priest or twelve", but I'm pretty sure she'd take it and it wouldn't be my problem anymore, and unlike just killing it, I don't have to worry about anyone finding the body and arresting me.
What is usual. Selling that little bastard to science, duh. I hate kids, a lot. Like, in the "I'd rather shoot a syringe full of flesh eating bacteria, Ebola, bubonic plague, and AIDS right into my eyeball than ever be a dad" level of hate, so there is no way this kid was being kept, demonic origins or not. So let the nerds pay me a crapton of cash, then irradiate, dissect, shot, burn, and whatever else the wanna do to the little bastard.
Assuming that I can't prove that I just gave man birth to a satan spawn, dump it off on some chick I know who really wants a kid. Of course I'd mention the whole "Oh, by the way, this thing may be the anti-christ. Like, seriously check with a priest or twelve", but I'm pretty sure she'd take it and it wouldn't be my problem anymore, and unlike just killing it, I don't have to worry about anyone finding the body and arresting me.
I'm not keeping it. Because babies are not in my future.
I'll probably make use of that Moses Law I heard about and just leave it at the nearest hospital without a backward glance.
If that's too tricky, then off I go to give it up for I guess the longer form of adoption. Quickly so I don't get attached.
These choices are to make sure I don't keep the child but not causing it harm. You don't wanna cause harm to an evil, magical creature. They'll remember and it won't be pretty when they inevitably hunt you down.
I'll probably make use of that Moses Law I heard about and just leave it at the nearest hospital without a backward glance.
If that's too tricky, then off I go to give it up for I guess the longer form of adoption. Quickly so I don't get attached.
These choices are to make sure I don't keep the child but not causing it harm. You don't wanna cause harm to an evil, magical creature. They'll remember and it won't be pretty when they inevitably hunt you down.
I thought Aphrodite was born from Cronos' balls when Zeus castrated him... or something...FalloutJack said:
OT: Eh... I'd save the world by strapping it to a chair and having it watch MLP for eternity... which is probably a hell of its own sort, I guess... =.=
Hm, considering that I am a male, and I do not seeing any decent way that this baby could be birthed, I'm guessing I would probably be killed by suddenly birthing the baby, considering that I have no proper birthing hole or natural pain relievers to soften the experience, and I would probably die of agony no matter which hole, or whichever spot it decides to come out of.
But in the event that I somehow survive, or it patches me up with its evil magic, I would probably raise him so that he will take over the world and crush all who oppose him, and he can be just like Meruem from Hunter x Hunter!
But in the event that I somehow survive, or it patches me up with its evil magic, I would probably raise him so that he will take over the world and crush all who oppose him, and he can be just like Meruem from Hunter x Hunter!
That was Dionysus. Aphrodite is, generally, considered to have come out of the ocean as a result of Cronus severing Uranus' balls and them falling in the sea. There's a few other versions but none of them have her coming out of Zeus' leg, unless it's really obscure.FalloutJack said:
Zeus also gave birth to Athena from his head. The Greeks were weird, man.
OT: Kill it with fire.
I'd call it "Kugutsuchi" and then set it on fire, and make it pee molten clouds of H2SO4 at people I don't like.
And when I'm bored with it, I'll cut off its genitals and throw them into the ocean, hoping that a walking fish salesman (a salesman who is a fish, not a man who sells fish) will come to my house and give me a £500,000 house and a bag of party poppers.
His grave will read, "Kugu-something, the baby of magic balls".
And when I'm bored with it, I'll cut off its genitals and throw them into the ocean, hoping that a walking fish salesman (a salesman who is a fish, not a man who sells fish) will come to my house and give me a £500,000 house and a bag of party poppers.
His grave will read, "Kugu-something, the baby of magic balls".
I'd probably step on it before Griffith uses it to reincarnate his body in the physical world, summoning a thousand years of darkness.
Although probably not, since I don't think I could actually bring myself to do it... it was an adorable little hellspawn.
Although probably not, since I don't think I could actually bring myself to do it... it was an adorable little hellspawn.