Are you a "nice guy"?

[Prrromotion]

I'm also one of the nice guys who got the girl. It's my first relationship, my girlfriend is super-cute, and it's been going rather smoothly for the past 2 1/2 years.

A platonic friend I'd known for a couple years pushed me into her once, told me to "give her a hug, you dope." That's where it started, yup.

 

[the_green_dragon]

Funny think I dont actually have any ugly friends but none that I find attractive. Its kind of like your sister, no matter how good looking she is you will never find her attractive.

Tell that to Jaime Lannister... Hahaha

Oh see the poster above you, he's one of the guys I was originally talking about.

 

[GestaltEsper]

Funny think I dont actually have any ugly friends but none that I find attractive. Its kind of like your sister, no matter how good looking she is you will never find her attractive.

Tell that to Jaime Lannister... Hahaha

Oh see the poster above you, he's one of the guys I was originally talking about.

Jamie who?

 

[David Huff]

Not by your definition though I do consider myself to be a nice person.

Exactly

 

[Smooth Operator]

No wonder nice guys can't get anywhere, by all the descriptions sofar they seem to be baby munching demon spawn only wearing human skin, I wouldn't date something like that either.

 

[Kurokami]

Nope, I'm not a "nice guy".

As for what women find attractive in men, well I don't find anything attractive in men.

Yay me for being super helpful!

That's cold!

Well best to be direct now, than crush your hopes later.

I mean wouldn't you rather be told the hot chick is a lesbian straight away than get to know her, develop a crush on her only to find out she's genetically programmed to not be interested in you?

Sorry, it was very subtle and silly, but I was just referring to your name. 'frostychick', ^_^

 

[Brynar]

I'm a girl, and I like nice guys. I don't get this thing of 'girls only like jerks' - say what? I hate jerks because, well, they're JERKS! Really, any nice guys out there thinking they'll get more attention from girls by being an asshole, don't. Just no. You can be a nice guy and have confidence/be assertive at the same time. Those assholes out there aren't being confident and assertive, they're being arrogant and acting like dickheads

I agree. Many make the mistake to equate "Being nice" with "Being insecure, wimpy and indecisive". Be nice, but don't be a vag. Self-confidence is key. And I don't think you can go into a friendship in the same way you would a possible relationship.

 

[FrostyChick]

Well best to be direct now, than crush your hopes later.

I mean wouldn't you rather be told the hot chick is a lesbian straight away than get to know her, develop a crush on her only to find out she's genetically programmed to not be interested in you?

Sorry, it was very subtle and silly, but I was just referring to your name. 'frostychick', ^_^

I feel so stupid now. >.>

I guess it doesn't help that my last name is Frost.

 

[Kurokami]

Well best to be direct now, than crush your hopes later.

I mean wouldn't you rather be told the hot chick is a lesbian straight away than get to know her, develop a crush on her only to find out she's genetically programmed to not be interested in you?

Sorry, it was very subtle and silly, but I was just referring to your name. 'frostychick', ^_^

I feel so stupid now. >.>

I guess it doesn't help that my last name is Frost.

Is your first name Emma? Cause that would be awesome.

It was kind of a roundabout/stupid joke that could easily be misinterpreted so don't feel bad. =]

 

[Woeps]

Yeah i had this for a long time -_-'

Eventually you'll find a girl who will appreciate it, at least I have found one now

 

[the_green_dragon]

Funny think I dont actually have any ugly friends but none that I find attractive. Its kind of like your sister, no matter how good looking she is you will never find her attractive.

Tell that to Jaime Lannister... Hahaha

Oh see the poster above you, he's one of the guys I was originally talking about.

Jamie who?

Jaime Who?? JAIME WHO??!!!

http://www.lmgtfy.com/?q=Jaime+Lannister

Check it out and watch the series. It's da bomb!

 

[DestinyDriven]

Well being female, I guess I could put my opinion in. However, this is just MY opinion. I am not speaking for any other females here.

Women are very much attracted to confidence. They can also be attracted to dominance, authority and status. I am too. To me, I equate that to masculinity.

We want a man who is a nice guy, but who oozes confidence, who can protect us. From the way you dress, to how you hold yourself and talk.

I guess it it primal. You know, a big strong man who will look after us and protect us.

You don't have to be perfect or anything, I am just talking about something many women fantasize about. The charming knight who saves the princess.

First impressions always count. Show you are confidant and assertive (that does NOT mean being a jerk), women will love that. Just remember to be yourself. We don't like posers. Oh yes, and we like men who dress well.

 

[DestinyDriven]

Women are very much attracted to confidence. They can also be attracted to dominance, authority and status. I am too. To me, I equate that to masculinity.

I understand why you want this. My problem is that I have absolutely nothing to be confident about. I'm not particularly attractive, although some women seem to have been attracted to me solely on the basis of my looks and the most ephemeral parts of my personality. I'm short at 5'7", yet I'm attracted primarily to tall women who wouldn't dare be attracted to me. I'm uneducated, with a demonstrated tendency towards both academic and professional failure. I don't know enough about most things in order to speak confidently about them, and those subjects which I am knowledgeable about just make me sound like an arrogant nerd when I discuss them. What's more, I can't even deliver that confidence when I'm around women, because I'm paralysed by fear.

The most crushing thing is the desire women have for money, status and financial security, something I can never deliver because I'm a professional imbecile who will never get a job after I leave the one I'm in. I can't even deliver anything for the mercenary gold-digging types, let alone the women who are interested in traits beyond pure security.

My question is: Why the hell does everybody have to make me feel guilty about being a romantic failure? I already feel bad enough about the rest of my life, without having to know that there is going to be nobody in the future who cares about me.

If you are in a place where you can't even love yourself, how can you expect things to get better? Trust me, I know how you feel. But you have to look positively towards the future, not dwell on everything that has gone wrong. Life can seriously suck. But we have to try to make the best of it. It s hard, but I am still fighting too. I hope you find yourself again, and I wish you luck.

 

[WolfThomas]

I recently spent some time with a woman who'd gotten divorced, I found it really embarassing how she kept saying how much of a better person I was than her ex, like I completely didn't know how to respond. I felt especially guilty as, while I wasn't callous enough to only be interested in the sex, I didn't really see any long-term future. It wasn't anything overly chivalrous or altruistic either, simple things that I took for granted like helping her bring her stuff in from the car or referencing a story she told earlier in a joke to show I was listening, stuff that's just from how my parents raised me.

Er back on topic, I think someone summed it up earlier perfectly by saying "it's better to be a Good man than a Nice Guy". You don't have to be a cocky asshole to get woman (though they do quite well it seems too), but you do have to be a man, not some whiny boy complaining how "woman are all bitches, because they won't go out with me".

 

[thom_cat_]

Well I don't lie to people and I'm selfless towards people I like. I'm very nice. But I'm also confident now and masculine once someone's allowed me to pass that barrier.

But. I left my last GF just a few weeks ago, and my previous ex just said she liked me. I then kissed my ex and then she said "I'm not ready for a relationship but I like you" and it's like "NNNNNNGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUU-"

 

[FrostyChick]

I feel so stupid now. >.>

I guess it doesn't help that my last name is Frost.

Is your first name Emma? Cause that would be awesome.

It was kind of a roundabout/stupid joke that could easily be misinterpreted so don't feel bad. =]

Thankfully not, it's bad enough being a girl on a gaming site, but a girl with a comic book inspired name? No thanks. >.>
(my name is on my profile anyway)

 

[SckizoBoy]

If you are in a place where you can't even love yourself, how can you expect things to get better? Trust me, I know how you feel. But you have to look positively towards the future, not dwell on everything that has gone wrong. Life can seriously suck. But we have to try to make the best of it. It s hard, but I am still fighting too. I hope you find yourself again, and I wish you luck.

I find myself in a similar position to yourself. I often feel shitty because it is difficult to understand the concept that someone may be attracted to me (or that's the feeling that I get). However, I can be quite a confident individual, brimming with wit, eloquence, humour and intellect that impresses but doesn't overwhelm. Unfortunately, it fights a sometimes losing battle against the frequent episodes when I struggle to justify how I am a man let alone a human, ruminating on shit that I couldn't've prevented and denying myself everything that's good about me.

That said, I'm trying, and it's fucking hard, because I know that the one woman I wish happiness for may never find it. And if I go back to her, which I want, I'm sort of dooming my own future as well as hers. I would genuinely cry tears of joy if she managed to find a boyfriend who could make her laugh. (Then, I'd proceed to wonder how to stop being single... *sigh*)

 

[Kurokami]

I feel so stupid now. >.>

I guess it doesn't help that my last name is Frost.

Is your first name Emma? Cause that would be awesome.

It was kind of a roundabout/stupid joke that could easily be misinterpreted so don't feel bad. =]

Thankfully not, it's bad enough being a girl on a gaming site, but a girl with a comic book inspired name? No thanks. >.>
(my name is on my profile anyway)

Haha, damn! She's one of my favorite characters as well.

Either way I've derailed this conversation enough, good day to you! =]

 

[Mr Fixit]

I'm either a "nice guy" or a complete & total ASS. No middle ground for me. Don't over think the "lets be friends" thing & move on, trust me its better for everyone that way.

 

[shadow_Fox81]

yes to the point its a fault.

and you always finish last (figuritivley most nice guys are quite spritely)

but most people who arn't overly kind call me an asshole with a superiority complex because i held the door open for them.

i guess its subjective (sigh)