Bisexuality doesn't exist

[dex-dex]

In order not to confuse anyone, I need to tell you that I'm a dude.

I've heard this. A lot of times.
Wherever I go, whomever I talk to, this is the thing that pops up in their mind.
Their gender or sexuality doesn't matter, it's always the same.
If I tell someone I chose a guy in front of a girl, I have always got this as a response; "Maybe you are just completely gay". Every. Single. Time.

The same works the other way around. Except this time, the heterosexuals say that "maybe you were just experimenting with homosexuality" and the homosexuals say that "you are in denial bladibibla".
Even the last guy I was dating was like this. He was convinced I was homosexual because I was in love with him (and him being a guy).

This was okay in the beginning. I didn't really mind this. I know what I am and I don't care what anyone thinks of it.
However. This has been going on for several years. It's not really about the years. It's about the fact that this has been going on for as long as I have been open about my sexuality.
Now, this is pissing me off incredibly. Of course, this makes these people say "oooooh why are you getting so upset huh? :3 You know what it means when you take it personal riiiiight?"
I'm not taking it personally, I am just tired of hearing how I am and what I am is a lie and to be told I am something else. I know what I am and nothing is going to change that.
Point is, people are hell bent on telling me bisexuality is bullshit.
That's my rant.

So escapist people. What do you think of bisexuality? Is it a bunch of bullshit?

You are not alone dude.
I have gotten the same kind of shit with the people I have come out to. mind you my friends do not but others who figured it out have asked me if it just a phase.
I do find it annoying when say it does not exist. I find it even more offensive when other gays/lesbians do it. I mean having people tell you that you "decided to live this type of life style" and then you are condemning other members of the LGBT community. like what the fuck?

 

[Treblaine]

*Snip*It's just annoying.*Snip*

Sorry to be churlish with that snip but it's just that. Annoying.

So many annoyances in the world, you'd go crazy if you let them all got to you. It's not just homophobes or idiots, but all sorts of bigots and assholes. The best you can do is not let them ruin your life. Do not let them pass laws against you, or nor regulations nor restrictions. But as far as "huurr, it is this way, so there"...

Fuck em.

You may realise eventually the world is full of so many horrible things, the best thing you can do is minimise the damage to you and your loved ones... you can't win every battle.

 

[CODE-D]

I dont trust bisexuals, make up you mind.
True Neutrals are weird.

 

[Tonimata]

Well, I'm living(?) proof of the fact that it does exist, so if you want to take solace in that, be my guest. Also, I'm single

 

[MajWound]

There is a human sexuality theory that our default setting is bisexuality. Which direction we lean as we grow older depends on our upbringing.

 

[zehydra]

Yes, it can theoretically exist. Does it exist? Hell if I know.

I know people who are gay and straight, but I actually have never met an openly bi guy. Maybe for the reasons you provided, I dunno.

One thing I've wondered myself (this is just speculation, I have nothing to back this up), is maybe some people are actually asexual, but feel like they need to pick a partner, when in fact they're not actually attracted in the usual sense. This is the conclusion I've come to with pansexuals, since the concept of those people makes very little sense to me otherwise.

But I dunno.

 

[orangeban]

Yes, it can theoretically exist. Does it exist? Hell if I know.

I know people who are gay and straight, but I actually have never met an openly bi guy. Maybe for the reasons you provided, I dunno.

One thing I've wondered myself (this is just speculation, I have nothing to back this up), is maybe some people are actually asexual, but feel like they need to pick a partner, when in fact they're not actually attracted in the usual sense. This is the conclusion I've come to with pansexuals, since the concept of those people makes very little sense to me otherwise.

But I dunno.

What doesn't make sense about pansexuals? Pansexuals are(I'm pretty sure this is the correct definition) basically just more extreme bisexuals. Bisexuals say, "Man or woman, it's all good to me!" and pansexuals say, "I don't care about gender! Man, woman, trans, neither, both! It's all good!". Pretty simple concept I'd say.

 

[ckam]

I never really thought of it as lies, but I get what you mean. When someone claims something that I am not, I do get miffed about it.

I'm an asshole? Fine. I'm a religious fanatic? Not fine.

 

[zehydra]

Bisexuality totally exists. In fact, the sexuality paradigm as we think of it is basically made up definitions, so there are certainly more expressed forms of sexuality than just Straight, Gay, and Bi. As Kinsey said, the only unnatural sexual expression is the lack of it, which of course rules out A-sexuality, but that's a discussion for another thread.

But it seems to me that straight-ness is the dominant trait when it comes to sexuality. It's difficult with these things to draw the line and say what's "natural" and what isn't.

I'd say asexuality is just as natural as homosexuality and whatnot.

 

[zehydra]

Yes, it can theoretically exist. Does it exist? Hell if I know.

I know people who are gay and straight, but I actually have never met an openly bi guy. Maybe for the reasons you provided, I dunno.

One thing I've wondered myself (this is just speculation, I have nothing to back this up), is maybe some people are actually asexual, but feel like they need to pick a partner, when in fact they're not actually attracted in the usual sense. This is the conclusion I've come to with pansexuals, since the concept of those people makes very little sense to me otherwise.

But I dunno.

What doesn't make sense about pansexuals? Pansexuals are(I'm pretty sure this is the correct definition) basically just more extreme bisexuals. Bisexuals say, "Man or woman, it's all good to me!" and pansexuals say, "I don't care about gender! Man, woman, trans, neither, both! It's all good!". Pretty simple concept I'd say.

sorta. I had a conversation a while back with one on here, and it was more like, "We are attracted to people, not gender". It was very sort of abstract. The very idea of being sexually attracted to someone's personality doesn't make much sense to me.

 

[orangeban]

I don't know if I really buy bisexuality. Someone who gets romantically involved with someone of the same sex is a homosexual, so vis a vie technically anyone who considers themselves bisexual - is also a homosexual, sometimes they just like to have relationships with members of the opposite sex. Again technically speaking, bisexuals are homosexuals.

Alright, I've seen this one before, the only way to beat it is to play the same game.

Someone who gets romantically involved with someone of the other sex is a heterosexual, so vis a vie technically anyone who considers themselves bisexual - is also a heterosexual, sometimes they just like to have relationships with members of the same sex. Again technically speaking, bisexuals are heterosexuals.

See, that was literally just a Ctrl-V of what you said, but with the sexualities swapped round. Do you realise how if you say one, the other must be true, and therefore they cancel each other out? The mistake you've made here is assuming that homosexual means, "Has sex with people of the same sex." No, that's wrong. Homosexuality is actually an exclusive attraction to members of the same sex.

 

[Lukirre]

I don't get why people have to identify themselves with a sexual preference.

Can't we just say "I like what I like" and be done with it, without worrying about about things like "Am I hetero/homo/bi/omnisexual"?

But no, apparently people have to get all up in your face about what you do privately.

 

[orangeban]

Yes, it can theoretically exist. Does it exist? Hell if I know.

I know people who are gay and straight, but I actually have never met an openly bi guy. Maybe for the reasons you provided, I dunno.

One thing I've wondered myself (this is just speculation, I have nothing to back this up), is maybe some people are actually asexual, but feel like they need to pick a partner, when in fact they're not actually attracted in the usual sense. This is the conclusion I've come to with pansexuals, since the concept of those people makes very little sense to me otherwise.

But I dunno.

What doesn't make sense about pansexuals? Pansexuals are(I'm pretty sure this is the correct definition) basically just more extreme bisexuals. Bisexuals say, "Man or woman, it's all good to me!" and pansexuals say, "I don't care about gender! Man, woman, trans, neither, both! It's all good!". Pretty simple concept I'd say.

sorta. I had a conversation a while back with one on here, and it was more like, "We are attracted to people, not gender". It was very sort of abstract. The very idea of being sexually attracted to someone's personality doesn't make much sense to me.

I don't think it's about being attracted to personality, I think it's more a case of not really giving a shit about gender. To put it bluntly, they just want sex, no matter the genitals.

 

[zehydra]

Yes, it can theoretically exist. Does it exist? Hell if I know.

I know people who are gay and straight, but I actually have never met an openly bi guy. Maybe for the reasons you provided, I dunno.

One thing I've wondered myself (this is just speculation, I have nothing to back this up), is maybe some people are actually asexual, but feel like they need to pick a partner, when in fact they're not actually attracted in the usual sense. This is the conclusion I've come to with pansexuals, since the concept of those people makes very little sense to me otherwise.

But I dunno.

What doesn't make sense about pansexuals? Pansexuals are(I'm pretty sure this is the correct definition) basically just more extreme bisexuals. Bisexuals say, "Man or woman, it's all good to me!" and pansexuals say, "I don't care about gender! Man, woman, trans, neither, both! It's all good!". Pretty simple concept I'd say.

sorta. I had a conversation a while back with one on here, and it was more like, "We are attracted to people, not gender". It was very sort of abstract. The very idea of being sexually attracted to someone's personality doesn't make much sense to me.

I don't think it's about being attracted to personality, I think it's more a case of not really giving a shit about gender. To put it bluntly, they just want sex, no matter the genitals.

I was more or less referring to the conversation I had with one. Though Wikipedia favors your view.

 

[Irony's Acolyte]

I don't believe bisexuality is a bunch of bullshit. Apparently some people have this idea that sexuality is some black and white thing. That's there's no in between, you're either in one category or the other. Which is rather silly, because we're talking about something related to the human mind. Do they really think people can all be perfectly put into two categories which relate to 'what you like'?

I find that image to be a great example of sexuality. While there probably are people out there who are totally straight and totally gay, and I wouldn't be surprised if most people mainly one or the other, pretty much everyone is somewhere in between the two extremes. And there are probably some that are some totally different option, like asexuality.

 

[XDravond]

Sexuality is a complex question.A guy (an American scientist of some kind) investigated the American populations sexual orientation and produced a scale (like 1-10) on what sex attracted them the most and not to many where completely homosexual or heterosexual witch means a large chunk of the population has some attraction towards the same sex but prefer the other (for one reason or another)...

So Bisexual DOES exist although old views of "how to be and not" do (in my point of view) affect some people to either believe or not dare accepting something that they an not understand.
"What you fear you hate and say it should not exist/does not exist..."

Ok Google is great the scientist name is Alfred Kinsey (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfred_Kinsey ,for people without the ability to search the web...). Weird guy anyhow....

 

[kickyourass]

*snip*

Pro Trip: don't believe idiots just because they are persistent and numerous.

Example: a lot of idiots insist that we did not evolve from primates but rather god created us by magic. Literally. These people are idiots. It does not matter how many people say this or how often, a lie repeated often enough is not truth.

Bisexuality does exist and anyone who says you are a liar you can tell them to "Fuck off".

Took the words straight out of my mouth good sir.

 

[Char-Nobyl]

In order not to confuse anyone, I need to tell you that I'm a dude.

That gets you points right off the bat, and explains a lot. When a guy is a practicing bi, it has a lot more weight behind it than when a girl does the same. It's a gender double-standard, but it's kinda true. You don't usually get straight guys making out with their fraternity brothers through college because of booze alone.

I've heard this. A lot of times.
Wherever I go, whomever I talk to, this is the thing that pops up in their mind.
Their gender or sexuality doesn't matter, it's always the same.
If I tell someone I chose a guy in front of a girl, I have always got this as a response; "Maybe you are just completely gay". Every. Single. Time.

Actually, gender/sexuality does matter for one simple reason: you're speaking with people who aren't bisexual. For a heterosexual, it's easy to acknowledged a person as homosexual, and vise versa, simply because there's a clear divide in sexual preference. For either group to acknowledged that someone essentially occupies both groups is rather confusing, because it requires that they accept that you like who they like (gender-wise), but also the other side of the equation.

The same works the other way around. Except this time, the heterosexuals say that "maybe you were just experimenting with homosexuality" and the homosexuals say that "you are in denial bladibibla".
Even the last guy I was dating was like this. He was convinced I was homosexual because I was in love with him (and him being a guy).

Meh. I'd just be reiterating what I said above. Again, most people are either straight or gay, and being genuinely bi is something of an anomaly. A fair deal of the time, people are just referencing prior experimentation or the aforementioned booze-induced makeouts.

This was okay in the beginning. I didn't really mind this. I know what I am and I don't care what anyone thinks of it.
However. This has been going on for several years. It's not really about the years. It's about the fact that this has been going on for as long as I have been open about my sexuality.
Now, this is pissing me off incredibly. Of course, this makes these people say "oooooh why are you getting so upset huh? :3 You know what it means when you take it personal riiiiight?"

Wait...I'm actually not sure what you're getting at. What does it mean when you take it personally?

I'm not taking it personally, I am just tired of hearing how I am and what I am is a lie and to be told I am something else. I know what I am and nothing is going to change that.
Point is, people are hell bent on telling me bisexuality is bullshit.
That's my rant.

There is a very simple solution to your problem: fuck everyone who doubts you. Then, not only will they believe you, but other people won't question your sexuality because word will have gotten around about how you dealt with the previous doubters.

 

[Char-Nobyl]

my main issue with the scale is that (and im sorry but it is only the lbgt community which does this) try and evaluate me into a sect, im not a 1 or 6 im a person. The labelling and need to associate with a label only serves to drive people apart. Which is opposite to my goal in that people should strive to be more social.

Labeling isn't actually bad. It can help promote understanding. the problem comes in when people try and take it as gospel, and it seems like you're doing that with the assumption that you can't be a 1 or a 6 and still be a complex individual.

Understanding that sexuality is more than linear is important to understanding, and charts and graphs and other visual aides really do help with that.

You're a person. That's awesome. and if we shed all our labels, we might miss that a disproportionate number of a certain group tends to get killed compared to others.

It's a nice, specious philosophy.

But there's a difference between 'labeling' someone and 'numbering' them. He had problem with the latter, not so much the former, at least as I saw it. And he has a point: of all the things about a person you shouldn't try to put into numerical form, emotions and sexuality are two of the foremost.