Bisexuals: The Outcasts of Outcasts.

[Nimcha]

The Kinsey Scale is also very old and quite outdated.

How is it outdated as a scale of sexual orientation? I feel it should probably include Asexual, which it doesn't, but how else?

You're right, let me rephrase. The scale itself works as a crude model of sexual orientation, but Kinsey's studies and his conclusions are rather outdated.

 

[Monkeyman O'Brien]

Ya know. It always pisses me off even more when people who have been victims of abuse then abuse others.
So any homosexual or transwhatever who then treats bisexuals poorly just because of their sexuality is not even a double ****. They are a quadrupal **** who should be discriminated against.

And while I am on the subject. Everyone who says "Everyone is a little bisexual." stop projecting your stuff onto us. Because no, not everyone is bisexual at all.

 

[Blow_Pop]

Sexuality is awesome and bisexauls are the hottest of the hot!

That viewpoint would actually be part of the problem for bisexuals. It's overused by celebrities and those seeking attention that bisexuality gets looked at as something that doesn't really exist. Just thought I'd through that out there.

That is precisely why a lot of gay and straight people don't like them. For those of us who aren't attention seeking whores/celebrities, it puts us in the position of if we date the opposite gender we're "straight" if we date the same gender we're "gay" but never bisexual because to a lot of people it doesn't exist because of attention seeking whores and celebrities who throw it around because of whatever reason they have. Just makes it harder for certain people to be accepted no matter what community you are talking about. From the ones I know personally, most of us just ignore it. I honestly couldn't care less. I know who I am and what I am and I'm happy with it so screw everyone else who doesn't accept me and pay them no mind.

 

[Zen Toombs]

I think someone who labels themselves as "bisexual" is gonna get shit. Because in reality, everyone is a little bisexual. The way we dress, the way we view television actors, all of that is stemmed off of attraction we get off of the same gender, and the need to apply it to ourselves.

Can you explain this? That doesn't make sense to me at all.

It's hard to explain it, but in a way, it exists because it doesn't really exist. Bisexuality really implies that you are hot for both genders, yet it is viewed as "unequal" because there is no end game. Not many cultures and societies are all to hot on having more than one partner. Being bisexual pretty much implies that you can't settle down.

Erm, there is totally an end game. It's the same as everyone else's end game: either shack up with as many fun people as possible (aka the Barney Stinson [http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/15000000/Barney-Stinson-barney-stinson-15066651-842-1191.jpg]) or find your One True Love[sup]TM[/sup] (aka the Marshall [http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/18800000/I-m-Cuddly-*****-marshall-eriksen-18854000-370-330.gif]). And, just like in standard heterosexual relationships you can end with one partner, two, three, or a harem depending upon your fancy.

Now personally, even though I'm a bisexual I still prefer only one partner. It's just what I like. I also know straight people who prefer open relationships. It all just depends on your tastes.

 

[bakan]

Actually, I don't care at all which sexuality someone has, or might have.
We are living in 2012 and it should be time that everyone gets a bit more open-minded, at least in developed countries.

 

[ABAP]

Bi now, gay later.

Part of the reason gays don't trust bisexuals, I think, is that, in the first place, bisexuality is seen as a sort of middle ground between heterosexuality and homosexuality; generally, it's probably more palatable to parents and to homophobic friends--if a dude at least like girls, then he isn't a total homo, the thinking goes. (I just noticed you touched on this in your original post, but I'm not going to delete all that.) There's also a bit of evidence to suggest that, at least in men, it doesn't really exist; most men who identify as bisexual are almost exclusively into men or exclusively into women. Also, it's trendy. In a poll on another forum I just happened to be reading today, just under half the population went both ways, apparently. It wasn't an LGBT forum or anything.

Anyway, I haven't noticed a lot of discrimination against bisexuals in general, but maybe that's because I'm not bisexual. "Pansexuality," however, seems to be the cool thing now at my school's GSA and among the supportive people I know.

 

[OtherSideofSky]

Discussing experiences of male on female rape is often utterly inappropriate with men present, and sometimes straight-dating bisexuals.

Why would anyone hold a meeting only to discuss male on female rape unless they were dealing with a specific individual experience, in which case the presence of men should be no problem? I've yet to see any study suggesting that the effects of male on female rape differ significantly from any other kind of rape, and the latest survey statistics show parity or near parity for rape across genders (see the analysis of the actual statistics here: http://www.genderratic.com/?p=836. I encourage you to check the numbers yourself.). That being the case, isn't rape a universal issue which needs to be discussed by the entire community?

The problem of discrimination against bisexuals in LGBT communities is neither new nor unique. I find it somewhat reminiscent of "The Myth of the Black Community". In reality, the LGBT movement primarily represents the needs and desires of white middle or upper class gay men, often to the exclusion of other voices and viewpoints within that community. Victims of oppression are sometimes under the impression that they are somehow incapable of oppressing or discriminating against others and see their experiences as a justification for the "rightness" of the way they exclude or discriminate against minorities in their own communities. If you want an example of similar behavior, search this site for threads about bullying.

Also, most gay people are as far from getting the idea of sexuality as a spectrum rather than a binary state as most straight people are. Hell, you even get a lot of bi people who think that everyone is secretly bi and just repressing it. It's the same thing.

i think its probably something like agnostics, both belivers and atheists hate agnostics as there seen as "fence sitters" or they "have a foot in each camp" which isnt really seen as a good thing in these kinds of "us vs them" debates

This attitude exists because idiots don't know what "agnostic" means and started using it as a middle ground between theism and atheism when it's actually one end of an entirely different scale. For example, I am an agnostic theist. I believe that there is a god, but I do not believe that it is possible to possess definite knowledge of god(s). The position can be further expanded to knowledge in general, which is where you get people who don't believe it is possible to know anything with certainty.

 

[Trippy Turtle]

Nobody should be against them especially not the people who are also looked down upon because of their sexuality. I also however don't see much reason for letting everybody know. I mean sure, be Bi and tell if people ask but you don't see anyone going out and yelling "I'm straight!". If you are being looked down upon for it then you told people who would look down upon you. I'm going to assume an asshat like this isn't your friend. How on earth did you end up telling someone like that?

 

[Phisi]

I would think it is because what binds the gay community is their shared sexuality, this also explains why many are so open about it. A bisexual person is in the gay camp but the gays aren't in the bi camp. It's something like the guy who's friends with the nerds but also goes off and joins the cool kids, the nerds in this case see them as someone who while identifies with them, they can't identify with and don't have to endure what they go through. Oh and all the girls that say they are bi in order to seem sexy.

 

[Rottweiler]

I can only really speak from my experience and from what I am told by friends who are gay or lesbians, but:

Bisexuals are seen as 'wishy-washy' or 'they want to have their cake and eat it too', or 'they just want an excuse for why people don't like them instead of blaming themselves'.

Understand, I'm not defending this- but this is generally the only reasons I've heard expressed for disliking Bisexuals as a group.

To be blunt, the most negative feelings I've heard expressed are due to the fact that for a time- and now, to an extent- it was 'fashionable' to be something other than heterosexual. Unfortunately, that meant a number of shallow, generally useless people started loudly claiming to be Gay or Bisexual- not due to sincere feeling, but to excuse their feelings of alienation and feeling like an outcast. After all, it's not *them*, it's because they're .

This of course backfired because the *actual* gays and bisexuals felt they were making them look bad (with justification) and unfortunately it became a general label and stereotype.

 

[Erja_Perttu]

Asexual people have it just as bad, what with all the "they don't actually exist", and "they just say that because they can't get any" stuff that gets thrown around.

I hadn't actually considered Asexual people. That is a wonderful point and a great note of a much overlooked minority. I'm sure there are some out there who actively identify as asexual, and could, in fact, get some.

I'll put my hand up and say I'm one of those people who could get some if I wanted it. Being asexual isn't repulsive and it doesn't mean that the person is automatically uptight, or ugly, or a hipster.

Spoiler: Some little background on my own experiences with asexuality.

I've told very few people about my orientation because no one can deal with it, even my liberal parents. It makes them uncomfortable and awkward if I ever bring it up. I made a joke once about how I didn't want to sleep with Hugh Jackman and the look that they gave me made me feel like I'd told a Holocaust joke.

The only friends of mine I told were an arts student, a bisexual and a biker friend of mine, the kind of people used to stereotypes and prejudice or just being demeaned, but I didn't get any support from them. It was like I'd just told them I wasn't human.

They told me I'll live my life alone. I've been told I'll never be able to have a meaningful relationship with people because I'm not right. I've been told not to go looking for relationships because it's not fair on the other person, because of the way I am. I've been told I should cure myself by 'sleeping with people until my sex drive comes back'.

What I've found is that whilst being asexual is very liberating because I'm not alone, there are other people like me that I can talk to on the internet, my real life is full of people who either do, or would look at me like I'm a robot if I said anything.

I couldn't imagine going to a rally about different sexualities. If bisexuals get left out for being different to homosexuals, where the hell would that leave someone like me?

 

[Aprilgold]

When you see a Biesexual dating one gender and not the other for some time, it becomes hard to think that they are Biesexual down there. This is why some Biesexuals don't assign as such, but instead sign by which gender they prefer. Thats just what I think it is. Its like someone that says their a crack addict yet they always are in perfect condition, crack free.

I suppose that Asexuals don't really have a reason for being hated on, neither do biesexuals, but at least I can try and explain that hatred. I'll give it a shot anyway.

I'm assuming that its because Asexuals don't get much sexual arrousal, and as such, people think that they just don't get out there enough to truly know their sexual identity.

I really don't think its a big issue, while still a issue. There are work arounds.

I think its because people think of sexuality as a pure dichotomy like a light switch or binary something can be one or the other, which is rather silly because nothing (Besides artificial constructs) tends to work that way, most things just seem polar because the majorities exist at the poles.

Or this, I could always be wrong. This could always be the answer to this question.

 

[Lord Kloo]

Some people have hetrophobia, some have homophobia.. bisexuals although benefiting from being able to be sexuality attracted to both sexes unfortunatly will fit into both and quite a few feel forced into one group or another (as in to be stuck to guys or gals)..

It doesn't help that pretty much everyone I know (and I know mostly educated people) doesn't understand much about sexuality other than what their own preference is. They don't recognize that sexuality is a spectrum and that people can be a bisexual of varying ratios and as such bi people are perhaps frowned upon for 'sitting on the fence' being a semi-closeted homosexual or just plain attention seekers..

People dislike things they can't understand, example, my male (I'm male as well) friends really can't understand how a guy could like a guy, luckily they see my choice as my right and don't burden me for it, however I can understand that lesser people may take a different approach..

TLDR: people don't like things they don't understand, and as some from both hetro and homosexual groups don't understand the other bisexuals get caught in the crossfire as a two faced enemy of all..


Just making sure, my post does seem a bit derogatory to bisexuals, trust me I have nothing but the highest regard for those who can come out as a bisexual.

EDIT: Remembering something someone said once, "being bisexual is greedy".. Liking two kinds of ice-cream doesn't make you greedy, taking two does.. although I'm happy for people to have three/four/nth way relationships..

 

[Eventidal]

Uh, I don't know. I'm bisexual and I've never felt hated by anyone for it.

If I ever do feel like someone is hating on me for it, I'll call them right the hell out on it. I won't take bullshit from anyone about my sexual preferences. ESPECIALLY not someone in a group purported to be all about sexuality/gender equality. That's just pathetic. You can't have your cake and eat it, too. If you expect any kind of respect from me (which in general I'm entirely willing to give) you'd better be prepared to reciprocate on it.
I like penis and I'm married to a woman. Here's where I'd put all my fucks, if I actually gave any: ( )

 

[MetalMagpie]

I guess the point is that people who are bisexual have slightly less chance of being forced to make this public.

I'm bi, but am currently happily living with a partner of the opposite sex. The result of which is that I have no need to tell people about my sexuality unless I want to. As far as my family, co-workers and most of my friends are concerned, I'm completely straight.

I can see the possible friction, which is why I don't try to identify myself with the LGBT scene.

 

[Wargamer]

I identify as bisexual, though I've had more male partners than female.

I do not, however, have any sympathy for the 'woo! I'm so bi it's awesome!' crowd. I have had this conversation before:

[to a girl] "So, you're bi?"
"Yeah."
"Ever slept with a girl?"
"No."
"Kissed a girl?"
"No..."
"Wanted to?"
"I've not met the right person..."
"Looked at girl porn?"
"No!"
"So you haven't done anything REMOTELY sexual with a girl, all your partners have been male, yet you're Bi?"

That gets tiring. If people are 'bi curious', and say as much, I'm fine with that, but when blatantly straight people pretend to be bi, that kind of rubs me the wrong way.