Brace Yourself for the Boobquake!

Andy Chalk

One Flag, One Fleet, One Cat
Nov 12, 2002
45,698
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Brace Yourself for the Boobquake!


Today is the day for Boobquake, an effort by women around the world to bring about the apocalyptic end of life as we know it with the magical power of their boobs - or, conversely, to make Iranian cleric Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi look like one.

Sedighi, a "senior Iranian cleric," said last week [http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2010/apr/19/women-blame-earthquakes-iran-cleric] that immodest women were to blame for the increase of devastating earthquakes around the world. "Many women who do not dress modestly... lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which increases earthquakes," he claimed. "What can we do to avoid being buried under the rubble? There is no other solution but to take refuge in religion and to adapt our lives to Islam's moral codes."

Despite Sedighi's iron-clad logic, one woman has chosen to tempt fate: Jennifer McCreight, who launched a "Boobquake" Facebook page [http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=116336578385346] in order to encourage the world's floozies, hoochies and other women of low moral fiber to show off their cleavage in hopes of sparking the Boobquake. Women who feel their greatest assets are located elsewhere on their bodies are invited to wear skimpy shorts instead.

And don't get the idea that this is just some kind of funny Facebook stunt meant to make some Iranian wacko look like a nutjob, either: This is serious science! "I fully plan on doing some statistics after the event," McCreight wrote on the Boobquake page. "I know many earthquakes happen on a daily basis, so we're looking to see if Boobquake significantly increases the number or severity of earthquakes. Or if an earthquake strikes West Lafayette, IN and only kills me, that may be good evidence of God's wrath as well." If it's decided in peer review that a larger sample size is required for scientific validity, she added, she may also factor Mardi Gras into her calculations.

Boobquake is scheduled to take place today, April 26, and thus far more than 200,000 people have signed up as "confirmed guests" for the event. You ladies out there who might feel that this event is inappropriate or embarrassing somehow, bear in mind that this is for science, and the advancement of academia is never something to be ashamed of. So step up and do your part!

Of course, should Boobquake fail to launch the apocalyptic tremors predicted by Sedighi, McCreight expressed confidence that he'll have a perfectly rational explanation for why civilization failed to end, which may or may not include a discussion of plate tectonics.

(photo [http://twitpic.com/1iortw])


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Katherine Kerensky

Why, or Why Not?
Mar 27, 2009
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Well... I'd take part in this... apart from the part involving lack of modesty...
So yeah. I think I'll stay fully clothed. But I'll give my vocal support.
Nothing, not even science, can get me to remove any of my clothing...
Or even show cleavage. I'm going to stay in my all-covering clothes.
Despite how horribly warm it is now getting here...
 

matrix3509

New member
Sep 24, 2008
1,372
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I am just totally bamboozled (BAMBOOZLED!!!) at that cleric's reasoning.

BAMBOOZLED I SAY!
 

Woodsey

New member
Aug 9, 2009
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Mumorpuger said:
Okay..... there should be T-Shirts commemorating this event. Do want.
Fuck T-shirts, I want video evidence.

[small]In HD, with a highlights reel of the err... best "earthquake-inducing" breasts.[/small]
 

Julianking93

New member
May 16, 2009
14,715
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Eh, not much of a boob person myself.

Still, that's an...interesting way of going about things.
 

neoman10

Big Brother
Sep 23, 2008
1,199
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awwwwwwwwww man, I was expecting a bad troll :(

those thing make me laugh out of pity
 

ZehGeek

[-Militaires Sans Frontieres-]
Aug 12, 2009
368
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Definatly something that's gonna be interesting. I can only imagine the crazy religous person calling the cops in the middle of this just because there walking by it and not even gonna stay by like whatever area this thing's going on in. >___>
If your not gonna particapte, or care for that matter, kindly vacate the premisise, don't ruin it for everyone else. kthxbai
 

Carlston

New member
Apr 8, 2008
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Well...isn't as stupid as Chavez saying the Hati Earth quake was done by a American Earthquake machine... Our super secret earth quake cannon...

Must be that one Porn chick with the 52 triple G's... I knew she could destroy nations with those things.
 

Eliam_Dar

New member
Nov 25, 2009
1,517
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Bad Science, bad you were wrong... religion had it right from the beginning, earthquakes are caused by low moral fiber, not but tectonic plaques moving over a sea of lava. why would you do such a thing science, you liar





if you missed it, I relly need a SARCASM sign
 

TheNumber1Zero

Forgot to Remember
Jul 23, 2009
7,345
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And thus it is further proved that Science is running out of things to do.

Ah well, at least this one doesn't involve testing to see if Penguins cause Homicidal thoughts, and should end up making Hojatoleslam (Thank you Copy-Paste) look like a Fool.
 

NotAPie

New member
Jan 19, 2009
2,095
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Carlston said:
Must be that one Porn chick with the 52 triple G's... I knew she could destroy nations with those things.
See! that's what I've been saying, but no one believed me!