"Clinically proven" oxymorons and misnomers

[Odude]

Vicious circle. It's vicious cycle damnit!

Scientific law. There's no such thing people. Science does not deal in absolutes, only in evidence for or against a theory.

 

[Lazier Than Thou]

Irregardless. It's almost always used by someone who is trying to sound smarter than they really are, and it doesn't mean anything either! Regardless already means "without regard", via the "-less", they're essentially saying that it's worth regard. RAAAAAAGE.

I completely agree with this one. Irregardless is actually a double negative in one single word!

 

[captainwalrus]

Also when people say "a whole 'nother"

It technically isn't wrong. The "whole" is used as an infix. It's the same as "fan-fucking-tastic" or constructs like that.

Well yeah but "nother" isn't a word. "Other" is, but I hear a lot of people use "nother."

It just separates two parts of a single word. In this case, "another" is separated into "a" and "nother" with a "whole" separating the two, creating "a-whole-nother".

it's called temesis (don't know how to spell it)

Is it? I've always just called it an infix. =\

 

[Compatriot Block]

Also, I don't know if this counts, but "no offense" makes me end any conversation right then and there. Why is it that people think that they can get away with saying anything if thy add "no offense" to the front? "No offense, but you're a worthless pile of pond scum" IS offensive. And you do NOT get to be upset when I call you out on it. FUUUUUUUU-

I hate people.

 

[Hot'n'steamy]

One of the definitions (And a much, MUCH older one than "to be homosexual") of gay is, essentially, and obscenity, or a negative, odd thing. It's technically correct to say, "That's gay,"

well that's incorrect. Gay means cheerful, quirky, jocund, and even brave.
I have no idea where you got that idea from.

 

[Abedeus]

Also, I don't know if this counts, but "no offense" makes me end any conversation right then and there. Why is it that people think that they can get away with saying anything if thy add "no offense" to the front? "No offense, but you're a worthless pile of pond scum" IS offensive. And you do NOT get to be upset when I call you out on it. FUUUUUUUU-

I hate people.

No offense, but your hat smiles of limes and raggamuffins.

That's supposed to be sarcastic, I guess. Like... "not that I'm trying to be rude, but you're an idiot" or "probably never told you this, but I hate you".

It can be used with... less aggressive words after or before the "No offense". Like..

"No offense, but I think I can throw out the garbage!"

 

[Scrythe]

ATM machine. It IS NOT an Automatic Teller Machine machine.

My friends and I avert this by calling it the "Ass To Mouth machine". We will never look at ATM's the same way again.


Also, it's not called a "text message". It's called an SMS. Short Message System. Beat it into your skull.

 

[Abedeus]

ATM machine. It IS NOT an Automatic Teller Machine machine.

My friends and I avert this by calling it the "Ass To Mouth machine". We will never look at ATM's the same way again.


Also, it's not called a "text message". It's called an SMS. Short Message System. Beat it into your skull.

I think that SMS (system) sends those messages.

How can something be a system AND a file the system sends?

 

[captainwalrus]

Also, it's not called a "text message". It's called an SMS. Short Message System. Beat it into your skull.

So, it'd be SMing, instead of texting? "SM me". "Let's SM each other". Ha. I'd never stop chuckling at that. But that's probably because my mind's cluttered with chain whips and gag balls.

 

[Scrythe]

ATM machine. It IS NOT an Automatic Teller Machine machine.

My friends and I avert this by calling it the "Ass To Mouth machine". We will never look at ATM's the same way again.


Also, it's not called a "text message". It's called an SMS. Short Message System. Beat it into your skull.

I think that SMS (system) sends those messages.

How can something be a system AND a file the system sends?

Same as how an mp3 can be both the compression AND the file.
Same as how a MIDI can be both an interface and the file.
Same as how a product can be both the title and the company's name. (A Moog, A Korg, or a Casio)

My mistake, though: It's SMS text message, where the shortened "text" comes from. When I think of "text", though, I think of books or those funny little files you make with notepad.

They used to be called SMS's or "short messages". The more you know.

 

[minarri]

Scientific law. There's no such thing people. Science does not deal in absolutes, only in evidence for or against a theory.

Agreed! Though it is funny to think of what might happen if you do somehow find a way to break one of the laws. Will you be fined, or arrested by nerds in lab coats, or...?

 

[Scrythe]

Also, it's not called a "text message". It's called an SMS. Short Message System. Beat it into your skull.

So, it'd be SMing, instead of texting? "SM me". "Let's SM each other". Ha. I'd never stop chuckling at that. But that's probably because my mind's cluttered with chain whips and gag balls.

Reminds me of that quip made when they didn't want to use the term "gay marriage" in paperwork. A comedian asked "What else can we call it? Gay bondage is already taken!"

 

[the1ultimate]

Lots of pleonasms. Yay.

Look up high!

...Can you look UP low? Or look DOWN high?

Well, high is an adjective in this instance, so in actual fact, I think it qualifies (somewhat imprecisely, granted) that you aren't just looking up, you are looking up high. Or you could use it to reinforce the idea of looking up.

Same goes for this:

Flying high....


If you are flying arent you already technically high up in the sky?

High as a kite, agian, if its a kite and its up in the air, isnt that a given that its high?

Have you ever heard of low flying?

 

[Biosophilogical]

When it is called "New and Improved", it is either new (something never before seen) or improved (the same as a previous version, just with additional functions/higher quality of work). How can something be both new AND improved?

As for my favourite oxymoron, i like military intelligence. Although not an oxymoron, when said as one I enjoy the joke.

 

[Aunel]

PIN number.
PIN is an abbreviation for Personal Identification Number.
Personal Identification Number number?

I didn't know that, I'll keep it in mind now.

 

[The Maddest March Hare]

Also, it's not called a "text message". It's called an SMS. Short Message System. Beat it into your skull.

On multiple occasions I've heard people call them "SMS Messages" or an "SMS System". The first isn't so bad, but the second is just another "PIN number" and "ATM machine" all over again.

 

[Biosophilogical]

PIN number.
PIN is an abbreviation for Personal Identification Number.
Personal Identification Number number?

Just consider this, if they still wanted to say number it would be PI number --> 'Personal Identification' number. If it was called that i would have my PInumber as 3141 (the first four numerals appearing in 'pi'.)

 

[minarri]

When it is called "New and Improved", it is either new (something never before seen) or improved (the same as a previous version, just with additional functions/higher quality of work). How can something be both new AND improved

I've never thought of that before, but you're right! Oh marketing...

 

[BehattedWanderer]

Scientific law. There's no such thing people. Science does not deal in absolutes, only in evidence for or against a theory.

Agreed! Though it is funny to think of what might happen if you do somehow find a way to break one of the laws. Will you be fined, or arrested by nerds in lab coats, or...?

Haha you guys aren't engineers, then. We deal in many absolutes--absolute certainties that our facade of not letting liberal arts majors know the tricks of our trade.

My favorite oxymoron:
Black Light. If the light were actually black, it would be dark. Black is nowhere on the spectrum, so how is there black light?