Corrupt a Wish

[FairlyFrightenedFeline]

Granted, but you are never allowed near a civillised place or they kill you.

I wish I could succeed in life.

 

[Disaster Button]

Granted but you succeed at being an unwashed, underpayed, loser who nobody will ever, ever touch even if you paid them.

I wish I had a grey scarf.

 

[The Kangaroo]

Granted but the scarf is evil and kills you and your family.

I wish I was friends with Ron Pearlman (War, War never changes)

 

[FairlyFrightenedFeline]

Granted, but the nuke holocaust happens and he follows you around always going on about how war never changes, and has arguments with Solid Snake about if it as or not, and you eventually kill him.

I wish I was the master of all jungle cats.

 

[CounterAttack]

Granted, but a firestorm breaks out and burns the jungles down, and you along with it.

I wish I had psychic powers.

 

[The Kangaroo]

Granted but you don't know how to use them

I wish fanboys would go away.

 

[TheSentinel]

Granted, but now there are only fangirls.

I wish for a buttered roll.

 

[CounterAttack]

Granted but you choke on it.

I wish I had an invisibility watch, and the knowhow to use it.
I play too much TF2. =)