Crappiest Superhero

[MelasZepheos_v1legacy]

Oh so many

Spoiler

Spoiler

And on and on and on

 

[Quiet Stranger]

aqua man

Aquaman is by far the worst I can think of.

as far as real superheroes go definitely aquaman

70% of the Earth is water

take that, "land based" superheroes!

OT: Meltman...with the power to MELT!

Plus not to mention how much water our bodies are made up of, especially the water in your head that if Aquaman fucks with just right....can KILL YOU!

 

[Riobux]

Burnt face-man, hands down. He's not only useless, but an annoyance. Also, the worst villain is a tie between have-a-nice-day man and taps-man. TAKE THAT YOU BURNT SHIT GAY FACE!

I am really a crime-inal! A criminal!

Beat me to it.

 

[Vivace-Vivian]

Qwark

Spoiler

 

[OceanRunner]

Turns-His-Eyelids-Inside-Out-Boy from Earthworm Jim.

 

[wooty]

What about Powdered Toast Man? Sure he can fly, but thats all

[http://img708.imageshack.us/i/leopoweredtoastman.jpg/]



And lets not forget, Choda Boy

 

[Snowden's Secret]

Brief Boy- he possesses a pair of magic underpants, which have the ability to turn brown at the first sign of danger.

 

[RivFader86]

Don't think to highly of the Green Lantern's (and all the other corpses and their colors)and their swiss army rings

 

[dragonslayer32]

X-ray Cat.

He can see through things, but only if they're made of wood. So if a crime is happening on the other side of a wooden door, he can see it.

and then the bannana came and gave a bag of eyeballs to the telephone repair man.

zebras in america beats all of that, half man half zebra? you cant top it lol

 

[TheYellowCellPhone]

Seizure-man.

He's just shit.

What? There's no way Seizure Man's as bad as Super Jerk!

Spoiler: Warning: Slightly Offensive

 

[omega 616]

Would I have be ninja'd if I say burnt face man?

http://www.burntfaceman.com/

Theres also freakazoid,

 

[Valkyrie101]

Ever seen Burnt Face Man? Have-a-nice-day Man and Mashed-potato-in-a-sock Man are good contenders.

 

[the_Sue]

Honestly, the wonder twins (not just because they're super annoying), but yeah, a close second is Aquaman unless there's some evil genius beluga whale or mad scientist octopus to stop.

Or Meg in that episode of Family Guy when everyone got superpowers but all she could to is change the length of her fingernails.

As far as made up crappy superheroes: Atomic Urine Man! His urine can slice through any material known to man, but it only works if he's had too much to drink.

 

[Sjakie]

Wait for Stephen to ask the audience for tips about superhero's

I always thought Batman sucked btw

 

[Mischiviktus]

Obvious-man, it's beyond obvious that he's obviously the worst hero ever.

 

[Counterwise]

Ever seen Burnt Face Man? Have-a-nice-day Man and Mashed-potato-in-a-sock Man are good contenders.

Nah man, those are villains.

 

[Justin Shea]

aqua man

Aquaman is by far the worst I can think of.

as far as real superheroes go definitely aquaman

I know it's just fun for everyone to mock aquaman, but i'm betting that no one here knows what his powers are, besides the talking to sealife.

Breathe underwater, tough enough to be invulnerable to machine gun fire, superhuman strength, swim at very high speeds (10,000 feet per second), enhanced sight and hearing, dehydrate and therefore instantly kill anyone, shoot jets of scalding water, healing, create portals into mystical dimensions, nullify magic, etc. If you expect a superhero to do more than that, you expect too much

I'll admit, i have little knowledge of Aqua-man, provided only by Family-guy, which is well known for its exaggeration. Can he do those things out of water? obviously not the swimming, but the other stuff too.

I'm a few days late with this response, but yeah, all of his powers (minus the obvious swimming and such) can be done on land. He did used to get weakened if he was out of water for too long, but that's been gone for a while now.

And I enjoy jokes about aquaman, it's just when there's a discussion about how bad he is, I usually show up and mention a bunch of his powers to get people to actually know what they're talking about.

 

[Justin Shea]

aqua man

Aquaman is by far the worst I can think of.

as far as real superheroes go definitely aquaman

I know it's just fun for everyone to mock aquaman, but i'm betting that no one here knows what his powers are, besides the talking to sealife.

Breathe underwater, tough enough to be invulnerable to machine gun fire, superhuman strength, swim at very high speeds (10,000 feet per second), enhanced sight and hearing, dehydrate and therefore instantly kill anyone, shoot jets of scalding water, healing, create portals into mystical dimensions, nullify magic, etc. If you expect a superhero to do more than that, you expect too much

Besides which, Aquaman doesn't just talk to sealife, he commands them. All of them. That means everything from the cute-and-cuddly (otters and penguins) to vicious killers (sharks and squid/octopi) to gargantuan mega-beasts (whales) are all at his disposal. And since most of the planet is covered in oceans, and most of the world's economic and political centers lie on coastline, well...good thing he's a superhero.

Speaking of which: I'd say that if Aquaman were in, oh say, Superman Returns, I have a feeling Lex Luthor would have emerged from the Fortress of Solitude to find his ship sunk by an orca. Then, Superman would have been informed of his location, rounded him up before the whole "Kryptonite island" bit, and spent the rest of the movie doing something else.

But the actual lamest superhero ever? Ugly John (from Grant Morrison's X-Men run). To quote from the actual issue he appeared in: "I have three faces, and all of them look like pigs."

For my own: Mister Mess-Maker, with the ability to drop a bunch of stuff on the floor and walk away, leaving the other heroes to clean up after him while the villains get away.

There was actually a time when he could control anything that evolved from a sea creature (for example, a human) as well, but I never actually read anything where that happens, so I don't know how long that lasted for

 

[SamElliot'sMustache]

le snip
There was actually a time when he could control anything that evolved from a sea creature (for example, a human) as well, but I never actually read anything where that happens, so I don't know how long that lasted for

Yeah, I think that was in one of the JLA comics.

 

[Sephychu]

Seizure-man.

He's just shit.

At least he stimulates my clitoris.