I think it's a bit of a stretch to claim that those rules some women have are the result of a prejudice against men. In many cases, they're a personal choice for those who believe that more genuine relationships are formed when you don't jump into bed with each other straight away, or even that it's simply more rewarding to build up to these things. Sure, it has the added effect of preventing you from being screwed over by assholes, but I don't think it's fair to argue that these attitudes are the result of an unfair attitude towards men.Icehearted said:I don't really see how, though I may be a bit less inhibited about calling out what's become the norm. I agree, it's every woman's right to be concerned, but this concern is often exaggerated. Let's not kid ourselves; "I don't kiss on the first date", "No sex until I'm ready", and "It's too soon" are phrases women have used far more than men. Often these things are said even when the issue hasn't been broached by the male half of the party. My point is really that there are intrinsic disparities between the sexes that favor the "men are dogs/ women have every right" statements we see generally at play.Shamanic Rhythm said:I think you're conflating a few issues here. Women have every right to be concerned about being approached in a situation they're not comfortable with. To suggest though that that logic of 'all men are rapists' carries over into the dating world is a bit much. If you politely approach a woman in a socially acceptable fashion, no one's going to begrudge you. Except possibly any husband or boyfriend she has hanging around.
I will give an example, but it's a bit off topic, though it punctuates things pretty well. Generally, if a man does anything to harm a woman sexually, in a way that inflicts pain, it's regarded as monstrous. Reverse that, and it's a comedic nut-shot.
Sexism plays a large role in western culture, and it's largely slanted against men now. Watch most commercials and women have it together while men are buffoons. Someone doing a dumb stunt, it's men, while women just roll their eyes. There was even a Jack in the Box commercial that had two grown men in a stroller that started whining until the woman gave them food (I think they were tacos). Movies, same, "reality" tv, same, news, same. Apply this mentality to dating and we have an environment of hostility and contempt already at play long before we even manage to make eye contact for the first time.
My female friends have pretty much all agreed with me, though they're less tactful about how they phrase it. It's tough dating, hell even making friends with the opposite sex, especially if you're the male and a stranger.
I think you'd be hard pressed to find anyone who'd laugh at a woman sexually assaulting a man. Also, I see an equal amount of commercials where the men are the buffoons as I do where the women are thinly veiled sexual objects. Speaking as a man living in Australia, I don't honestly believe that attitudes have come 180 from the previous century and men are now the ones who are the victims of sexism. As much as you can argue that "women have all the rights to deny men anything" I think it's actually a two way street - one that is ignored because it's generally assumed that no man would ever want to deny a woman something like sex, a kiss etc. I personally have exercised those rights on more than one occasion. Dating is, and always should be, about mutual consent: that means that as soon as either party is unhappy with anything, it has to stop. It's not simply about women having all the power.