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steeple

Death by tray it shall be
Dec 2, 2008
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jim_doki said:
5*, dont stick by her when she has a mental breakdown, she wont do the same for you, and in fact if you tell her your problems after her breakdown she will throw them back in your face before she dumps you

*this happened to me. this is commentary about my ex girlfriend and not directed at anyone in particular. most people will greatly appreciate you sticking by them through some kind of personal disaster, but my ex wasn't human, she was a psycho hose beast
wow man.... good thing you arent with her anymore... she must be realy fucked up
 

jim_doki

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Mar 29, 2008
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steeple said:
wow man.... good thing you arent with her anymore... she must be realy fucked up
I don't say this a lot, because it's egotistical and in a lot of ways disrespectful, but i am the best thing to have ever happened to that girl. she's not that badly messed up, just selfish, childish and never appreciates a good thing when it's there
 

Robyrt

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Aug 1, 2008
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To be as dorky as possible:

You can't get anywhere with the opposite sex by mashing buttons. It never works.

You can have limited success by just shooting fireballs over and over - by pursuing a one-point plan like "Swagger" or "Be direct" or "Look for common interests." Chances are that the high-level girls are immune to this maneuver.

If you want to actually win, you need to know your best moves - the qualities that make you dateable. You also need to know your matchups - how to put your best foot forward, how to make small talk and how to have deep conversations, etc.

Because people are judged on total value, known positive qualities like being rich, smart, attractive or funny are not a guarantor of success. Nobody who wanders up to a Street Fighter 2 machine ever expects Balrog the boxer to be a good character. He doesn't have a fireball or an uppercut, and he can't kick at all! Turns out that what he does have is plenty good enough.
 

iseko

New member
Dec 4, 2008
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pick up lines that are a no no

1) what is the colour of your tractor.
2) do you come here alot?
3) Hey baby, I have the entire dictionary tatoed on my *censored*. How about I come over a little later and put some words in your mouth.

Those are opening and closing lines in one.

Things that work? I don't know. Try not to look like a dork. If you see a girl you like, try and see if there is some eye contact. If you think there is then just grow a pair and go talk to her about something trivial.
 

BallPtPenTheif

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Jun 11, 2008
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Make fun of them. Girls like that for some reason. Not in a cruel asshole way, but it a fun observant way that hits the nail on the head while being vague enough that they can think, "No, he doesn't know that my father left me."
 

Spinwhiz

New member
Oct 8, 2007
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My advice is to have confidence and just be nice. "Hi, my name is..." seems to work most of the time as long as you aren't shaking in your boots. If they blow you off, move on! You would be wasting your time anyways and life is too short for that.

If you have trouble talking to girls and are a little shy, just do your best. Smile, introduce yourself and say "well, maybe I'll see you around"...then stop back in the store or whatever the next week or so (NOT THE NEXT DAY YOU STALKER FREAK) and actually buy something. It's even better if you have a reason to come back in (put an order in and will pick it up at the store, going to a movie a couple days later and passing by to say hello, etc etc. Be there for a reason and you won't come off as a stalker.

And last but not least, be nice (I know I already said it). Yes, some girls like assholes because they want to "fix them" but those girls are just as dumb as the guys they are dating. Step aside and let them find each other and PRAY they don't reproduce.
 

AuntyEthel

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Sep 19, 2008
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I usually under-exaggerate the number of dead bodies I store in my garage, and how they're potential pieces of my Shrine of Glistening Teeth.
 

goater24

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Feb 5, 2008
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Things that work? I don't know. Try not to look like a dork. If you see a girl you like, try and see if there is some eye contact. If you think there is then just grow a pair and go talk to her about something trivial.[/quote]

So yeah the next time somebody you like makes even a small amount of eye contact, ask them how the weather is and it'll all take care of itself....job done lol

Come on, find a common intrest and engage in normal conversation and be yourself. Unless your a dork that is, then act like a 'real' man (like in the films) grow some stubble and win a fight, all along reaking of Lynx bodyspray. Well maybe some of that but sort out any fucking BO you may have. Woman and men hate that and believe me the average level of BO is so much higher in gamers I have met a LANs
 

tendo82

Uncanny Valley Cave Dweller
Nov 30, 2007
1,283
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The secret to my success with women can all be attributed to one particular cologne, an elixir of love really.

Sex Panther cologne. 60% of the time it works every time.
 

broadband

New member
Dec 15, 2007
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Hey Joe said:
Being gamers, we are of course adept at pushing the buttons of the opposite sex. We're not anti-social lonely weirdo nerds, no, we just have higher standards than everybody else! Let's face it, with our superior intellect and wit, we can drive any member of the opposite sex wild with desire for you and an insatiable craving to play D&D until 3AM in the morning.
ohohoho, the arrogance i see in these words...
 

Hey Joe

New member
Dec 23, 2007
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1. Tell women about your illegal Mexican porn, it shows your erotic side

2. Carry around a huge wallet. Doesn't matter if there's nothing in there, just make sure it's huge. Eventually, you'll find someone who mistakes size for wealth.

3. When in a crowded bar, start with the most attractive girl and work down. The amount of alcohol you consume will make the ugly girls at the end of the night seem attractive. Seriously, it's a freakin' correlation.

4. "Hi, I'm wanted in three states for murder"

5. Compliment them like there's no tomorrow. Even if it becomes overbearing and weird ("I like the way you eat that ravioli") just keep on going!
 

theklng

New member
May 1, 2008
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i've honestly not cared about picking up girls ever due to my inherently intricate mind. oddly enough, i always come off with so much self esteem that people think i am riding with balls the size of planetary destroyers.

when it comes making an entrance to a room, a group or otherwise, you can bet your bionic implants that i'll make it, and people will look up to me as if i was some sort of king or person they have to worship. once inside, i keep making conversation and cracking jokes, quickly spotting what's going on in the conversation and why. at a certain point, girls just get interested. usually by this point i have no interest in them whatsoever, because i know that if i wanted, i could get better. based on what i feel like doing, i either take one of them home... or just leave when the time is right for me.

if i take a girl home, i am very rarely not disappointed by the intelligence of said girl. therein lies my greatest problem: i could quite possibly get any girl from any club, pub or other place to go with me; but i'll be damned if any one of them share the same level of consciousness that i do. on occasion, i've been lucky in finding a girl in my travels that had a similar understanding to me, only to find out that we would have to part ways because we're only staying in the same place for a couple of days, and either going in opposite directions or going home to our respective countries.

it annoys me to no end and every time it happens i can just feel the face of fate laughing at me. it's not like i'm giving up though, some day it's bound to happen.

--

so, moral of story? get confident in yourself, look around and keep trying (read: learn from your mistakes). if you think you're standing out because of how you think, then revel in where you stand (that's what i did). if you're introvert, shy or otherwise: challenge yourself. nobody else is going to do the job for you if you don't; walk into it as if you've got a score to settle with yourself (it's always better to be shy than to be shallow). i started out being shy as well, and i overcame it in this way entirely. if people try to puncture you, get sarcastic on their asses. nobody is better than you until they prove they are, and by flinging monkey poo they definitely don't show remarkable signs of intelligence.

once you get down to a talk mano-a-mano with a girl, just be yourself. you've already shown yourself as you can be, now you can show yourself from the side she'll like more when you're together alone, away from parties, people and so on. talk to her about her, learn about her what you think is important, and generally just see if you can keep a conversation flowing without resorting to superficiality. if things click, then great; but you shouldn't push for them if they don't.

... i think that is about what i can give for advice here. it's not an easy road for everyone. chances are my devilish handsomeness has given me an edge, but i'll bet that if you put your confidence before your looks and realize that what other people think doesn't matter, you can make it just as far. in order to have others believe in you, you need to believe in yourself first.
 

Axiis

New member
Dec 9, 2008
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1) Being yourself is probably one of the best things you can really do.

2) You have about two seconds for a girl to size up how you are in her mind by just looking at your appearence and how you present yourself. Try not to ruin whatever she already thinks by blurting out some corny ass pickup line, or comming off creepy.

3) Go for someone with somewhat of the same interests as you, like joining clubs that your interested in ( This only applies to highschool, I'm pretty sure. ) There at least you'll have something to chat about with them in there + Some common ground to walk on.

4) Don't come off conceited, this is a pretty big one, usually this is avoided by asking about her, and waiting until she asks something about you to really start in with all this "I do/am/like" stuff.

5) Personal story time; Been with the same girl for three years now, (Four in april.) And the first few days of getting her attention was a little on the crazy side, We've been friends for a few months before I started to reall take interest in her so I decided I'd find out a little bit more about her likes and dislikes. Found out about music. This is where it goes more on the better side for me, as I'd like to say I'm a veteran guitarist (Eight years behind my belt on that, I'm seventeen now.) I used one of my own original songs (I write some stuff now and then, I'm good at the playing part but not the song writting, as I lose my train of thought pretty quickly.) And then basically I just play it acoustically and sing, yeah... I said sing. When I was finished I got a peck on the cheek and then I just asked her out on the spot and she said yes. And here we are now.

Holy crap that was long xD Just my advice and story. When all else fails just whip out a guitar and start playing, women actually melt at the sound of it.
 

Blayze

New member
Dec 19, 2007
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so, moral of story? get confident in yourself,
So many problems would be solved if the people who use this rhetoric would only answer one simple question: How?
 

theklng

New member
May 1, 2008
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Blayze said:
so, moral of story? get confident in yourself,
So many problems would be solved if the people who use this rhetoric would only answer one simple question: How?
if you read that entire paragraph and the text below it, i gave you some pointers. lacking confidence is usually caused by fear of what others think of you. you need to challenge your fear to conquer yourself. that's it, that's how simple i can put it for you.

on an additional note, blaming me for you not understanding what i tell you isn't the way to go. instead of asking me "how?", you'd be much better off asking yourself what you can do for you. if i tell you, you'll only follow my instructions to the point where i stop giving you them; meaning you have learned nothing but following instructions. if you think for yourself how to fix it, you'll learn yourself something that is much more valuable in life: to think for yourself.
 

gamebrain89

New member
May 29, 2008
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Axiis said:
Holy crap that was long xD Just my advice and story. When all else fails just whip out a guitar and start playing, women actually melt at the sound of it.
or get a sports car and rev the engine. it makes them go to their happy place.

[link]http://autos.canada.com/news/story.html?id=b09e34ab-a604-415c-913e-67b8d2e3f838[/link]
 

CIA

New member
Sep 11, 2008
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Mariena said:
"Hey. You, me, sex?"

I haven't actually *tried* this, but I reckon I would not get much objection from the male-type-persons. With my supermodel looks and all that *cough* *hack* *wheeze*.

Nor have I attempted this at the females of the species, though I wonder how that would turn out. I'd either get a slap in my face along with "I don't roll that way, pervert!" or get asked "When?".

This is just theory, though.

Edit: You guys think I'm stereotyping you too much? :p
Honestly...no. Kinda sad huh?