Difference in age...

[Caligulove]

So last night I was back in town where I grew up and hanging out with old friends.

there was some drinking and as the party was going on, my best friend's brother's girlfriend started hitting on me... and talking about how more mature I am and asked me if I got to know her better if I would date her- and she would leave her boyfriend, etc etc getting way too close for comfort

currently, I have a girlfriend already.
but it creeped me out because she's 17 and still in high school and I'm 22.
I've already thought about either telling her boyfriend, who is my friend as well and he deserves to know that- or just leaving that shit lie and just not talking either of them, especially her, for awhile.

EDIT: and while we're at it- I guess discuss about how much age difference matters to you

 

[Cherry Cola]

Tell your friend to dump that *****. Then burn into her forehead "I am a cheating *****".

I don't mind an age difference if I'm in love.

 

[Shycte]

Depends on how mature the lovers are.

Also, how old they are. 18 - 23 is okay. 13 - 18 is not.

 

[Xpwn3ntial]

I call the half your age plus 7 rule, though it only really applies once you turn 25.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=half+your+age+plus+7

 

[Julianking93]

What's the problem?

EDIT: Oh, you said you already had a girlfriend. Okay, then.

Well age doesn't really matter, its how the person acts and how they behave. I dated a 19 year old for a while when I was 15 and we loved each other, so it doesn't really matter.

Admittedly, it gets a bit weird after a certain point like if one is dating another whom is half their age, ie: a 30 year old dating a 55 or 60 year old, but that's accepted in certain cultures so its just a different view point.

So really, age matters not as long as the two are in love.

 

[OmegaXIII]

That's not that big of a deal difference wise given that she is past 13. The issue here is that she clearly has some commitment issues. Shop her to save your friend grief down the line

 

[Torque669]

Tell your friend to dump that *****. Then burn into her forehead "I am a cheating *****".

I don't mind an age difference if I'm in love.

Completely and utterly this. Theres nothing really to it, you must do this.

 

[Raven's Nest]

Well it doesn't sound like you have a real reason to tell her boyfriend anything. Your probably more likely to make your own friendship suffer for it as nothing actually happened, you only had a conversation... She could have even been kidding...

And there is also the potential "he made that all up because I rejected him" factor/response from the girl.

As for the age gap?

It's only a problem if there isn't maturity. I'm 22 myself and I know some very mature 17/18 year old girls that i'd date given the opportunity. But if they still acted like a child then forget it. It's the social stigmata of the 17 year old "having poor judgement" that gets in the way for most couples like this, and the irrelevant "only using them for sex" argument (which I hate)...

I don't see why it is seen as a "gross out" thing considering most 17 year olds look like 25 year olds these days...

 

[Insanum]

Yeah...Depends on your mates relationship, If you say "your Gf hit on me" shes says "he hit on me"...Yeah...Could end badly if he's bigger than you.

Just move on, I mean im 20, and i wouldnt think anything of it, She's out of bounds & she'd only cause serious trouble.

My 21 year old mate is currently going out with a 17 year old, she was 16 when they got together. As long as they're happy, go for it.

 

[2012 Wont Happen]

Tell your friend.

I personally don't see any moral problem with 17 and 22. Some states do though. Here in TX I think that'd actually be accepted though

 

[Nickolai77]

Where you drunk enough to pretend you don't remember anything of this?

I would advise that you tell your best friend, and if he wants to, he can tell his brother. Or if you want to you can tell him personally. He's got a right to know, you'll be doing her a favour actually since she mustn't be happy going out with him. Ultimatly though, if the boyfriend finds out later on that you never told anybody, he may take that wrongly.

To me age is a factor to consider in relationships. I wouldnt be too fussed if the significant other was a bit older than me, but would prefer it if i were the older one. How young she is is only significant if she lacks maturity relative to me. I mean, if she was 17, but as mature as a twenty year old, thats fine. If she was 17 and as mature as a 15 year old, or indeed 19 (my age) and mature as a 14 year old (you get them kinda people) i would consider that a good reason not to get involved with them. I would'nt date anyone younger than 17, because of the socal stigma of dating a sixteen year old if your over 18.

 

[DazZ.]

I go by this rule.

As for the hitting on thing leave it, might just be messing about and if she is actually like that at parties he'll quickly find out anyway.

 

[Captain Pancake]

Just don't tell anybody, and make sure to stay away from her. If it comes to a head, point out the fact that for the most part you were all at least partially drunk, and that she probably didn't mean it.

 

[Azure-Supernova]

Hmmm, well I'm 17 and my girlfriend just turned 21 so i don't see the age as an issue. BUT you should probably tell your mate that his girl is a cheater.

 

[TheNamlessGuy]

DELETED

 

[theultimateend]

Largely speaking age is just a number. Sex is far too exaggerated. People seem more scared of creating life than they are of ending it.

 

[Aunel]

I go by this rule.

As for the hitting on thing leave it, might just be messing about and if she is actually like that at parties he'll quickly find out anyway.

good old XKCD, I already thought we would get a lot of those.

OT: tell your friend, then tell the girls parents she is hitting on you.

 

[Gladion]

Age gap is rather important. Why it's not good for a 23 year old to be in love with a 12 year old must not be explained (even though it didn't bother John Smith to bang Pocahontas! ), but later it gets a problem as well.

If the difference in age is big (let's say, 15 years) it can and probably will become a huge problem, as one partner retires much earlier than the other and then they both live in completely different stages of life. Also, the older one will (most probably) die much earlier, get sick, think differently, have different needs etc.
"Age doesn't matter as long as it's love" is purely wishful thinking.

About your problem: I'd say tell your friend and let the two solve this.

Edit: Why plus seven? Is there a special reason for it or was it just chosen randomly?

 

[HatchetDown]

Tell your friend to dump that *****. Then burn into her forehead "I am a cheating *****".

I don't mind an age difference if I'm in love.

I also whole-heartedly agree with this. I'm 21 and I have a 17 y/o that really wants to be with me but I'm kinda running secret tests to see if she's really as mature as she says she is.

 

[Trilby]

I go by this rule.

As for the hitting on thing leave it, might just be messing about and if she is actually like that at parties he'll quickly find out anyway.

good old XKCD, I already thought we would get a lot of those.

OT: tell your friend, then tell the girls parents she is hitting on you.

As far as I'm aware, this wasn't an XKCD original, though obviously it was covered there. I've heard people who have definitely never read XKCD use this.

And yeah, OT, tell your friend. Basic rule, "Don't be a dick". Which, again, is unoriginal, but there's so little truth in the world that it's rather unlikely that a given bit of it won't have been spotted by someone in the past few thousand years.