House of 1000 Corpses, 2/10
Straight fucking garbage. That's all I really need to say. One of the most annoying and overall unpleasant viewing experiences I've had in a long time. Feels like a movie made by some dipshit teenage edgelord who pesters you to watch gore videos with him because "it's so gnarly dude!" There's no plot, likable characters or nearly anything of merit here. The only thing it has going for it are occasional moments of visual flair with the whole Halloween haunted house aesthetic, but it's completely ruined with the editing, the music and just... fucking everything about this pile of vomit. The visual style and editing are legitimately nauseating at times, and multiple times the movie just gives up and becomes a music video, which Rob Zombie just should have made instead. Because as a film this is straight up amateurish. I have to stress the editing, because it feels like it was made by someone with severe ADD on coke. It's so jumbled, ugly and messy that it was close to giving me a headache. There's no consistency or purpose to anything, it's just constantly throwing different stuff at the wall and seeing what sticks: framerate changes, sepia tone, negative colors, random inserts, jump cutting, slo-mo, the list goes on and it's annoying beyond words.
I'm legit puzzled by who this film is supposed to be for. It can't be for horror fans because it's not scary or original. It can't be for gorehounds because for all its posturing there's actually fairly little violence in it. Do Rob Zombie fans like this crap? Are they all mush-brained edgelords who just enjoy the Halloween aesthetic and people screaming? Because that's the only possible demographic I can think of for this dogshit.
Finally - and this is something I wasn't expecting - I find this movie to be in genuinely bad taste. Having delved a bit into true crime and deep web stuff recently, I just find the aesthetic this movie puts on quite morally repugnant. Like I said, it's not scary. Instead it presents all this shock value like, again, an edgy teenage dipshit who goes "Whoooa duuude, isn't that messed uuup? Whoooa, it's so gnarly duuuuuude!" Unlike in other serial killer horror movies, the presentation isn't used to unnerve the viewer (like, say, Silence of the Lambs) or establish an atmosphere of dreamlike, inescapable horror (Texas Chainsaw Massacre for example). The film legitimately thinks it's cool. And in doing so becomes impossibly lame and annoying.