You know we invented police for this exact reason, so they could do the things you need them to do. Not murder, though I have heard great things about jail. Call the cops already.
Domestic abuse
- Thread starter Blackjack 222
- Start date
Met a guy in Uni who said he'd had this problem. Asked the cops how to avoid trouble if they went at a home invader again. Apparently the police said that you can use a bat if you hold it the wrong way around. Shows that you were in a rush and panic. But that's what he said, and I wouldn't call his word law.ThatPurpleGuy said:
OT: Don't kill them, it's not worth the effort. Talk to the police instead of talking to us.
Call the police, the more calls they'll get the more suspicious of those two, and while killing them would be quick, it is still killing two people, where you'd go to jail, and since this would be first degree murder, (depending where you live) you might get something as severe as life imprisonment or the death penalty.
Um, I'm sorry, but you are actually being serious? Are you really talking about possibly killing these guys if they carry on knocking your friend about? Or do you mean that she could kill one or both in self defence if they attack her again? Either way, violence and murder is not the answer. And you are pretty fucked up yourself for thinking about this seriously in the first place. No offence meant, of course. I simply say that because it takes a certain kind of mind to think about murder, even in such circumstances, and while I commend you for wanting to protect your friend, your methods are exceptionally wrong and would simply lower you to that person's level instead. Not to mention, if you do go through with killing one or both men, then you are liable to go to jail (or even face the death penalty depending on where you are), and that won't exactly allow you to protect this woman any more, which would be a major issue, especially if you fail to kill one or the other of these two guys.Randy11517 said:
Overall, regardless of whether or not the cops are idiots, you need to tell them and let them deal with it. Failing that, get some money together and find somewhere away from your town (maybe with friends or ideally your own family) and then convince her to leave with you. If you fail, then sadly you can't really do much about that. After all, it has to be her choice, overall, otherwise you'll just be making things worse and possibly even put her in more danger. If she does agree to leave with you, then you can go somewhere safe and then start making arrangements to help her through the emotional trauma and also to help her be able to live a decent life again, on her own.
Regarding the idea of killing these guys though, it's NOT justifiable, and it won't be at any point unless you happen to, by pure chance, be there for a good reason at a time when these guys start hitting her again. Then, and only then, would it be alright for you to intervene, and even then you shouldn't try killing them at all, but simply subdue them and call the police or whatever. If you set out to kill them, then I'm sorry, but I would gladly see you sent down. Domestic abuse is a vile, evil crime and should never be tolerated. But murder is even worse, and I would hold absolutely no sympathy for you if you do go out and kill them. And I can't think of many who would, either.
Alright. After calming down from the news and reviewing that i will go over her local PD. Issue with me calling them as it happens is i am 2 states over and while my hearing is good its not THAT good. We have the friendship that you don't communicate unless things are really awesome or you are waist deep in trouble looking for advice or a helping hand. Since i have no way of knowing immediately if it happens again should i just go hunting for the proper person to contact to get shit done over her local PD's head?
I'd say call the police. Its the best solution.
You may want to call the hotlines or go to the websites for domestic violence for further help.
You may want to call the hotlines or go to the websites for domestic violence for further help.
You've called the police, and they've done nothing? Post the city/department they're from, and you'll get hundreds of responses coming at them, wondering why they're not taking a domestic abuse case seriously.
Really, CAPTCHA? coungled Gender?
Really, CAPTCHA? coungled Gender?
No, you'd be charged with homicide still. And what would your friend think if you murder her son and her husband, even if they are abusive fucks? This would cause more problems then solve. Get her to contact the police and tell as many people as possible, to vouch for her case.Randy11517 said:
I was not meaning to say you were wrong, or even respond specifically to you (still not used to the idea that quoting people sends them a message, sorry), but just pointing out that calling the police is not a very effective means of dealing with the situation. Most likely it will leave OP frustrated and at worst she might receive more abuse because her husband is pissed the cops showed up. Attempting to convince her to call the police or leave is probably much better. Maybe even find her some information on battered women's shelters and give her an idea of her options.Mimssy said:
Its common. They need proof or evidence and if she doesn't speak up or tells them everything is fine they have little to go on other than someone not there who says something happened (that's called hearsay). Many police officers are actually quite frustrated when they have a feeling that the abuse is real but they have nothing to go on and so can't do anything about it.Paksenarrion said:
Oh mate don't even go near that sh*t, as f*cked up as it is women need to make the decision and leave, because 9/10 love the abusive asshole of a husband in a strange dominance wanting way.
I'm not being sexist here but it is simply the case that most of those women would still deny being beaten and defend their husband to the grave, so they need to reach the point of realizing that sh*t can't work and call the cops.
And now for a little story, uncle of mine once hastened into saving such a damsel when her husband got really drunk and you could hear all sorts of screams from their apartment.
So my uncle busts into the apartment the wife is already covered in blood and he just goes ballistic on the husband knocking him out for the night, a true hero right... ya but helping people is very illegal.
Two weeks after the incident he gets a court summon because he is being prosecuted for breaking and entering, and two charges of assault(supposedly he beat them both).
And the grand witness in all this was ofcourse the wife, because she remained conscious through the entire event, and she was absolutely convinced my uncle assaulted them and her husband would never lay a hand on her... there is the main problem you can't help someone who likes it.
Well luckily the trial went on a couple of years(with appeals and all) so one day the wife again walks into the court room all bruised and the judge just dismissed the case right there because it was pretty obvious where she gets her beatings.
I'm not being sexist here but it is simply the case that most of those women would still deny being beaten and defend their husband to the grave, so they need to reach the point of realizing that sh*t can't work and call the cops.
And now for a little story, uncle of mine once hastened into saving such a damsel when her husband got really drunk and you could hear all sorts of screams from their apartment.
So my uncle busts into the apartment the wife is already covered in blood and he just goes ballistic on the husband knocking him out for the night, a true hero right... ya but helping people is very illegal.
Two weeks after the incident he gets a court summon because he is being prosecuted for breaking and entering, and two charges of assault(supposedly he beat them both).
And the grand witness in all this was ofcourse the wife, because she remained conscious through the entire event, and she was absolutely convinced my uncle assaulted them and her husband would never lay a hand on her... there is the main problem you can't help someone who likes it.
Well luckily the trial went on a couple of years(with appeals and all) so one day the wife again walks into the court room all bruised and the judge just dismissed the case right there because it was pretty obvious where she gets her beatings.
Yeah I mean you 'can' defend yourself but the laws here are so convoluded and 'unreasonable force' is up to alot of circumstances..I like that they think in my split second between life and death I have time to consider all the legal ramifications of what may happen.deadman91 said:
Basically a person has to go at you first, even if they are holding a knife or any weapon. If they haven't lunged at you with the knife and you thought you would do the sensible thing and try and break his face first, you would be in the wrong, well in the idiotic eyes of the law anyway.
Your best bet. Fortify your house and never leave it. It seems to work for me
Look, you can't just go around and kill people. That's not how society works. If you live in a society, live up to their rules. It's that or leave.
What would be best is to inform the police if it is as serious as you say it is.
Though this probably won't soothe anyone, really.
But, since I have no real experience with domestic abuse or that kind of cowardice, I can't hand out any other advice. Hope it works out.
What would be best is to inform the police if it is as serious as you say it is.
Though this probably won't soothe anyone, really.
But, since I have no real experience with domestic abuse or that kind of cowardice, I can't hand out any other advice. Hope it works out.
Quite likely you'll be charged with manslaughter.Randy11517 said:
Seriously, go to the authorities. Now.
Killing is always wrong. Murder in self-defense is handled differently, depending on the legal system of the country. In most developed countries, domestic abuse is a crime, while in some undeveloped countries it's a crime for the wife to complain.
I a agree with what most people are saying on the forum: call the police. What are you doing asking our opinion on domestic abuse that turns into murder? just inform some authorities so she can be removed from that environment (if police really refuse, report them to congressman, mayor etc. Keep going higher up in the chain until someone hopefully notices that too many of their subordinates are not actually doing their job).
I a agree with what most people are saying on the forum: call the police. What are you doing asking our opinion on domestic abuse that turns into murder? just inform some authorities so she can be removed from that environment (if police really refuse, report them to congressman, mayor etc. Keep going higher up in the chain until someone hopefully notices that too many of their subordinates are not actually doing their job).
I'm quite surprised nobody has mentioned the possibility that two on one means you are far more likly to simply end up being a victim yourself.
you have to be sure that she wants to leave the situation, because if you do anything from the outside, you could endanger her life. If the abusers suspect that she is asking anyone for help, they could beat her to within an inch of her life... or worse.
The best thing you can do for this woman is to make sure she knows she has other options. Eventually she'll get fed up enough to leave the abuser. Research abuse shelters, halfway houses, etc. that are within her range. If her access to cars is controlled, you'll have to take that into account, and research bus routes or confine your search radius to walking distance. Remember, be discreet for her sake.
When you have this information, only tell her this directly. Abusers tend to monitor emails, voicemails, etc. so don't leave any evidence. Make sure she knows where she can go, she'll figure out the best time to do it if she's serious about leaving.
Good luck to the both of you,
Vidiot
The best thing you can do for this woman is to make sure she knows she has other options. Eventually she'll get fed up enough to leave the abuser. Research abuse shelters, halfway houses, etc. that are within her range. If her access to cars is controlled, you'll have to take that into account, and research bus routes or confine your search radius to walking distance. Remember, be discreet for her sake.
When you have this information, only tell her this directly. Abusers tend to monitor emails, voicemails, etc. so don't leave any evidence. Make sure she knows where she can go, she'll figure out the best time to do it if she's serious about leaving.
Good luck to the both of you,
Vidiot
Stop being such a drama queen and just phone the police, though im guessing if you were going to do that, it would have been done by now, but instead of actually trying to help you take the time to make a stupid thread online about killing the people involved, Well done im super sure that is going to help, maybe they somehow read this post and are to scared to do it again.