Don't drop the soap

[CaptainKoala]

What a horrible thread. I don't even

This. Why would you do such a

OK, someone invoked Candlejack. Who's the idiot who sai

You're not supposed to say Candlejack, Now we're all do-

Great, You just had to say it! Interesting though, saying Candlejack would be a good soluti

Candlejack you son-of-a-bit

 

[Sigmund Av Volsung]

to quote a famous song; "#hold it don't drop it!#"
I have nothing more to add.
In that position, I would suggest running or punching/kicking *him* in the genitals.

 

[teutonicman]

Your first moment in prison you have to start some shit to prevent being turned in to someone's *****. So for me I'd either have made it clear I'm no one's ***** by now or I'm dead. Both options are better than being raped.

 

[The Heik]

So apparently there's some unwritten rule that if you're in prison you're either raping somebody or being raped by somebody (At least through the eyes of most comedians, Tv shows, and movies). So picture your first day in jail, and you step into the dreaded shower room. Eventually your faced by somone who is at least two feet taller than you. If you know martial arts you hear that he/she has twice your rank in whatever discipline you study, as a matter of fact, you just saw him/her display their skill on another inmates skull that same morning.
This person (will call him Bubba for male prison, Barda for the ladies) makes his intentions very clear, and there's no help in sight.

What would you do?

pretend to aquiest to his request, then rip his balls off. You do that, and no one will even think of trying to get your when your soap's on the floor.

 

[SamuelT]

I'd wonder how the hell he'd get in the prison, him being 8"3 and all.

 

[CrazyMedic]

I have 4 words for everyone in this thread "Go. for. the. balls."

 

[martin's a madman]

'IS THAT ALL YOU GOT BUBBA?DID YOUR MOTHER RAISE A LITTLE *****?'
'IS IT IN YET?'
'I AM NOT PROGRAMMED FOR FEAR'

 

[Dags90]

Reykjavic is the closest obviously.

...Obviously...I mean, who doesn't know that?

I'm glad this serious topic is being given the respect and understanding it commands. Stay classy, Escapist.

 

[dragonslayer32]

I am trained in boxing and wrestling, ao he is twice as good as me at these? Well, I kick him in the balls and bite/claw/stomp my way to respect. Did you not see Rocky 5?

 

[the fake]

tell him im a wizard then summon scorpions to rape his ass for a change

 

[Le Proon]

Now see, I used to be in the circus, a sideshow, really, my schtick was to eat glass.
Now this glass, it didn't break down, which means it was collecting around the ring of my ass, all those years I was in the biz.
So, go ahead if you wanna, but it'll be like stuffing it in a papershredder...

 

[Disaster Button]

I'd shout "LET'S ROCKET" and then take out my Satellite Stunner. Pink Ranger wins.

 

[EvilMaggot]

I would not be in America?

Its an American Phenomenon.


Here in Denmark, it even goes so far in the opposite that inmates punishes sexual offenders.

Rapists and child molesters sometimes finds their faces covered in boiling water and sometimes even a mix of of boiling water and sugar, which is rather nasty... As it sticks to the skin.


Its one of the public services that Hells Angels do for Denmark.

hehe yeah the prisons in denmark are kinda.. just live there aswell

 

[Trucken]

Whatever it takes. Knee him in the groin, jam my thumbs into his eyes, bite off his ear, rip off his cheek with my teeth, rip off his dick Sin City-style, whatever it takes.

 

[bak00777]

wow there is a 7'11" (or switched the ' and " if messed that up) guy? Maybe i would start asking him he if plays basketball, you know try to change subjects so i dont get raped.

I wish I could tell you that I would fight the good fight and everyone would let me be. I wish I could tell you that, but prison is no fairy-tale world.

I read that in Morgan Freeman's voice.

 

[Dan E]

i wouldnt even be in jail. I would be on an island thousands of miles away. But if I was in that situation I would do my best to fight him off.

 

[Littlee300]

I heard it only happens in USA so i'm safe.

Wow we are fucked up people
____________________________________________________
I would have my tooth brush sharpened into a shank before I would take a prison shower.

 

[shadow741]

Brainwash him with repetition.

 

[Littlee300]

I would become the rape king. Because well I don't want to get raped thats sick. What....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVATUYADKGs
I believe this is what you mean.

 

[HT_Black]

Assume the position.

Ask him if we can wait until we get somewhere more intimate. And shank him if he falls for it.