Don't Film These Games!

[Sir Bob]

Good article aside from the traditional halo bashing... it's actually getting a bit boring bob, sure the games 2 onwards are WAY too short but thats always been my only real complaint,

some omissions from your list... major one would be half-life... tempting to hollywood i'm sure but i hope to god it never happens...


hey at least we won't get rapelay live action!

I don't think he was bashing all of the Halo series, rather only the storyline and characters, and he's right, how boring would Masterchief be in a movie?

Think of all the fancy conversations Le Chef has had in the past 3 games, and think of his wide array of facial expressions he demonstrated!

To be honest I'd much rather watch a Steven Seagal movie... Thats how bad the Halo movie idea is

 

[starwarsgeek]

He doesn't care about the length, he cares that there is little to no story, and that Master Chief has little to no emotion.

I'm gonna have to disagree with that second half. Although he has the "tough guy unable to show emotion" thing going on, the animation in some of Halo 3's cutscenes actually does get some through without him talking about it (and, in my opinion, was one of the sole redeeming features of the third game's campaign).

Spoiler

Watch how he reacts when he sees Cortana in pain in that recording, or when he finally finds her. Also, watch how stiff and focused his movements are after Johnson's death... Pretty good work, considering he's basically a suit of armor in the games.

While his dialogue is emotion-defficient, his movement isn't...in Halo 3, anyway.

And, yeah, I could see a GoH movie working (although that would technically be a book movie, not a game movie).

 

[Seatownstriker]

Sure I'd love to see a few games turned into movies. But there is just something about games that just doesn't translate well to movies. The appeal of games is its different for everyone, how one person completes a level or game totally differs from another. Granted most of the time the ending is the same for everyone. But how you get their is totally different. So when Looking at a game adaption into a movie. You might look at it and say, wow I'd never take that route I'd go this way and do it differently.

 

[Deadlock Radium]

major one would be half-life... tempting to hollywood i'm sure but i hope to god it never happens...

Wouldn't be hard to find an actor for Gordon Freeman at least, all they need is an arm and a crowbar.
I just hope to God [SUB](Even though I don't believe in God)[/SUB] that they never make a Half-Life film.

 

[SolracTheSin]

Gotta agree with the Uncharted comments. As much as I love those game I think they will make horrible movies. We all know its coming though.

 

[Krion_Vark]

5. Assassins Creed ... I'd like to see that.

Not until the series is over at least.

*Edit*
If they do I think Sam Witwer would make a good Desmond

 

[Loop Stricken]

I'm only a few lines into the article but I have to ask - Am I the only person who liked the Spawn film?

 

[Frozen Donkey Wheel2]

Who wants to take odds on what games he's going to list as "DO film" next week?

1. Metroid
2. Zelda
3. BioShock
4. Ninja Gaiden

All (or at least most) of those would make absolutely terrible films. The only way you could possibly do Bioshock is if you made it about Ryan and the creation/decay of Rapture. Metroid, Zelda, and the actual story you play through in Bioshock, all have the same problems of story structure designed for games (you know, the old "go here, kill/take that" formula) and of course, mute and personality-free protagonists. Ninja Gaiden....I don't know, I haven't played it, but I've heard that it's story is really bad. Again, not judging. That's just what I've heard.


OT: OK, I understand all the hate leveled at Nathan Drake. A lot of his "humor" falls flat and it is pretty hypocritical for him to be gunning down mercenaries all day without batting a morally-ambiguous eyelash. (He even tosses an innocent security guard off a cliff in the museum level) But come on: Is he really less likable then say, Marcus Fenix? Or for that manner, all the one-note badasses that populate, no, PLAGUE modern action games/films? And honestly, you haven't played either of the Uncharted games, so obviously you have no right to judge the character.

But more to the point: Apparently Moviebob has yet to grasp a very simple concept: BEING FILMABLE IS NOT THE MEASURE OF A GOOD GAME.

Other then that, though, good article. He's right about everything else. Looking forward to the "Film These Games" article. I personally think that there aren't any games that would make truly good films, but hey. I'll hear him out.

 

[SomeUnregPunk]

I keep on hearing people calling the Mortal Kombat thing a SAW knock-off. Are people watching a different clip than I am? How can you compare a clip that sets up an underground fight tournament where most of the clip is a fight scene where the decapitation fatality off screen with a psychological/torture horror franchise. Does SAW now have the "dibs" in movies that are shot a little bit dark and gritty? Maybe I'm missing something here but I just don't get it.

You know, I was gonna say the exact same thing?

Also, Starship Troopers isn't the only "human soldiers fighting aliens" film in the world. By your logic, Starship Troopers is a poor man's Aliens and even if, for some reason, you think that's true, they're both great films. Surely Halo would be closer to what Predators is shaping up to be, with the human fighters going up against a remarkably more technologically and physically advanced enemy.

You know what? I think the world is big enough for more films like that.

the only problem is that the starship troopers movie was sort of like the book... a commentary of war in general... except the sequels were just about halo versus bugs.

I'm only a few lines into the article but I have to ask - Am I the only person who liked the Spawn film?

I sort of liked it. John Leguizamo stole that film completely.

---

Worlds of Warcraft or Starcraft as movies would be cool.
... Or even the Command and Conquer series. That studio is halfway there anyway.

 

[DTWolfwood]

hmm yeh i can see how that mk short looks like a saw knockoff. color scheme and all. But still rather see the movie made in that light. since the movie will be made it would appear.

p.s. ill watch/read anything Starcraft. no matter the quality! my one true vice!

 

[K4RN4GE911]

Now here's something that looks interesting. At least in my opinion.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LHY8NKj3RKs

Who knows? With the right premise, it could actually pull it off.

 

[Lizmichi]

It's sad but true that Hollywood is going to get bored with it's overly masculine men in tight spandex and move into the untouchable idea of video game movies. Wish they learned their lesson with the other poorly done ones of the past. Next they'll be making Bejewled the movie.
Other games the SHOULD NEVER be a movie. Zelda, the main actor with have no lines just grunts. Portal, just... no. Mass Effect, god wish they really really can this film before it starts because part of what makes Mass Effect good was how you picked what would happen in the game and how your Shep acted and treated others. They're basically taking the cardboard cut out quick start Shep and going from there. Dragon Age, same reason as Mass Effect. Lastly, WoW, how the hell could they even do that as a movie?

 

[edthehyena]

I like how any psychotic murderers and gore is called Saw related when Se7en came out in the 90s.

Everyone knows about Saw. Not many people here know about Se7en.

If that's true, then we certainly live in dark times.

 

[joshpahr]

On the comic book movie front, Iron Fist has been in development hell for nearly a decade, but if it happens Ray Park is playing the title role. For a video game movie to work you have to put it in the correct hands, not Uwe Boll or Paul W.S. Anderson. Though I have to say in Paul's defense, the first resident evil was good, and the only one he directed instead of just wrote.

 

[MB202]

I like your list, and I look forward to the games you DO want to see adapted!

 

[dragontiers]

Don't Film These Games!

These are the videogame movies MovieBob really, really doesn't want to see.

Read Full Article

As a few other members have, I have to ask, how is the MK trailer like Saw? I personally don't see the connection. I would really appreciate it if someone could fill me in.

 

[For.I.Am.Mad]

I didn't realize that 38% on RT was 'mostly decent'. And that a domestic box office flop was considered doing well. What an odd dimension he must live in.

It's doing well internationally, for some reason.

 

[Podunk]

As a few other members have, I have to ask, how is the MK trailer like Saw? I personally don't see the connection. I would really appreciate it if someone could fill me in.

Word. I saw the first three Saws(The good one, the decent one, and the one so bad it made me stop watching them) and I don't think I saw anything like that... If the last one that came out, Saw XXVII or whatever, had some bad-ass psychopathic killers fighting one another in a no-holds-barred cage match to the death then I might have to go and see it.

 

[ZippyDSMlee]

Well ya I see why you would not want the drugged out wittless "H'wood" to try and not recreate them via their generic and lackluster abilities.....

But....lets run them down anyway.

Left 4 Dead::meh any dawn of the dead film is a good example as to why making film of L4D is bad.....

Call of Duty:I dunno a pointless war flick with a generic story using a lot of explosions dose not sound so bad...oh wait we have 2 transformer films for that....

Shadow of the Colossus: I dunno take bits from the golden compass and bits from the dark crystal and a dash of howls moving castle keep the dailog simple and witty focus on getting the items form the monsters in the dailog/ sub plots action wise do a bit of time bandits and actiony action sequances I dunno it could be good.

Uncharted:is so generic and bland it would be easy to make into a film.

Tomb Raider:More classic Indiana Jones with some matrails arts (Jackie chan style) and dual pistol action less painted up domomatrix digging in the ground with over priced "toys"............

Monkey Island: One word princess bride.....ok thats 2 words...... there is no reason why Monkey island could not be made into a great film under the right guidance.

God of War:ya you said it if they took COTT and made more violent it could work.

Final Fantasy: I dunno...... take LOTR and Star wars bring the over all tech level down to oh say a blend of medieval styles using high tech ships and what not but they have yet to leave the planet so the ships are not that great.

Art direction would be more LOTR crossed with 5th element. You break magic and physical abilities into techniques and magic own is using the bodies energy to produce a enough energy to profrom an attack where as magic relies on metal energy.

You don't have to go into it more than that for the over all plot do a mix of krull and princess bride.


Monster Hunter:it another generic setting with no rhyme or reason you'd have to make up a story useing the fiction and plot it out....blah,....

Halo: This is easiest one of all take star wars lower the tech a bit and toss in a bit of Star troopers 1.

I am surprised you didn't mention ZELDA
http://www.gameculture.com/2010/06/10/it-finally-time-zelda-movie