I don't see the big deal. This is no different than cell phone companies taking a stab at each other (which is just about every commercial), car companies comparing their car to other companies, and insurance companies claiming their company saves you more money than another.
I'd just the nature of marketing; Subway does it all the time, Coke and Pepsi are always taking shots at each other, and nobody usually gets bent out of shape about it because that's just how things work. I have absolutely no problem with someone in the marketing department coming up with the (somewhat) clever tagline of "above and beyond the call." I think it shows that they're behind their product. The phrase "call of duty" or "call to duty" as it's referred to by military recruitment videos, is somewhat cliche at the point so I think poking at that is fair game.
And I think you may be reading a little too much into the choice of the song, but that's ok, I do that a lot too. After watching it, my initial reaction was not that CoD may be the proverbial ***** to which the song is referring, but rather highlighting just how much shit is doing down in Battlefield 3. That's a lot of stuff to contend with in that trailer, and that's where I personally feel the song was going.
When taking on a giant like CoD, your marketing HAS to separate you from the game. It HAS to create buzz in some way. They're counting on this game being the one to topple CoD's stranglehold on the FPS market. I love aggressive advertising. I love the strategy EA is using to make sure people are talking about their game, and I love it because it's working.
But who knows, EA's marketing team could be as childish as you initially accused them to be. I don't think they are, but it's possible.
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