Escape to the Movies: Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters

Kargathia

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mrblakemiller said:
1. Abrams used too much lens flare ONE TIME and got hammered for it right when the film came out. Remember all the other stuff he's done that didn't have too much lens flare? Cloverfield was great. It's like cutting Al Pacino's nuts off for starring in Cruising.

2. Which came first, actual witch hunts or stories about evil witches? Mhm. And no, I don't care that some people some time used this phrase to kill people who were innocent. If I had that as a qualifier, I wouldn't be able to play the same video games all the school shooters have, would I?

3. Why is it still offensive for a man to punch a villian in the face if she's a woman? If you ask me, it's sexist in its exceptionalism. A man or woman punching a male villian in the face is just a hero punching a villian in the face, but women don't get to be "villians," they have to be "female villains." They're still an exception to the rule, still illegitimate in that role. I say thee nay. Kinda funny that this criticism happens one or two days after the Army starts talking about lifting the ban on women in forward combat positions.

But yeah, any main character getting hurt and nursed back to health twice by two different characters sounds like too much for a 90-minute film.
I think the problem was not that women get punched in the face, but that pretty much exclusively women get punched in the face.

Haven't seen it yet though, was thinking to maybe give it a rent whenever I feel like watching a shitty action movie.

xPixelatedx said:
Really Bob? You think this movie is sexist but Suckerpunch isn't?
Not sure about Bob's opinion, as I'm not him, but Sucker Punch did so many things wrong that appearing sexist didn't even make the front page of offenses.
 

Gilhelmi

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Oct 22, 2009
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erttheking said:
Gilhelmi said:
Andrew Siribohdi said:
Bob, I've been watching your videos a long time but even I'm confused by the link you have between witch hunts and this movie.
Have you heard of the Salome Witch Trials?

Long story short. In Salome, Massachusetts in the 17th (or 18th, I forget) century essencally rounded up all the women who acted differently the the State thought they should, tried them in a kangaroo court with evidence that would convict anyone breathing of being a witch, and then executed them.

It is still a sensitive subject around some people I know.
You do know that some guys were rounded up too right? Does the phrase "More weight" sound familiar?
??? *thinking**thinking****thinking*

Yes, took me a minute to get that reference, your right. They did add more weight to the "interrogation" device until the person confessed to witchcraft. Everyone confessed eventually.
 

Abomination

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Sylveria said:
Bob dislikes a movie AND is getting on his soap box about misogyny that can only be seen by people who are projecting so hard they've got a light shining from their head?

We'll I know what I'm going to see this weekend.

Here's the difference between real witch hunts and fantasy witch hunts.. real witches were women who were being persecuted for even being able to do math.. fantasy witches cast spells, curse towns and people, fly, turn in to monsters, summon demons, and kill people. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.

Tell me Bob, is every single instance of a woman being the "bad person" misogynous now? Cause I have family working at a women's prison and I wan't to make sure she knows that every woman there never did anything wrong, they are just victims of a misogynistic society - even the ones that murdered their entire family in cold blood. I've also played a number of games where there's a sorceress or a witch or a female demon or some crazy ***** on a power trip trying to destroy the world, are all those misogynistic? I'd ask if stuff where there's a female lead is okay, but I know it isn't since, after all, even if a woman is the hero, she's probably showing a bit of skin or through the virtue of simply having boobs is being exploited by being in a video game.

FFS this "everything is misogynistic" bull is getting out of control.

And your "I hate everything about the new star-trek" fan-rage is getting old and is incredibly ironic on the heels of your big "I'm sick of hearing these complaints" Intermissions. But, being the massive hypocrite you are, its okay to complain about stuff you don't like, but not stuff other people don't that you do or are indifferent to.
Thank you for summing up my opinion of this review. It felt as though Bob just didn't enjoy the movie and was scratching for reasons why the movie was bad. I thought he LIKED some action flicks that are just about action and had no overarching message to deliver. This movie is all about killing crazy, evil, magical, & sadistic wome--WITCHES in new and inventive ways using steampunk technology. That's it. It sounds like it was actually quite fun if you go in to the movie expecting that.
 

Hatchet90

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This is honestly the first time that I've ever heard of a problem with Abram's and his lens flare. I'm not being sarcastic, I'm not being facetious, I'm only being honest. I can't believe you Bob, judging a movie before a single pen has hit any paper because you didn't like on of Abrams' movies. I liked Super 8 and I loved Star Trek, so I fail to see a single problem with Abrams directing a Star Wars movie. Disney obviously has a lot of faith in Abrams, as do I, because I can guarantee that I could've gotten Joss Whedon if they wanted to (which would also be another excellent choice). I am optimistic about Star Wars: Episode VII.
 

XerxesQados

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rottenbutter said:
Aww, I was hoping you'd review John Dies at the End. I mean, I knew Hansel & Gretel would be bad, but I have no idea what to expect with JDatE.
See it. See it right now. Why are you still reading this? Go see John Dies at the End. Now. I'll go see it with you. I will buy your ticket. Just go. You want to see this movie. Trust me.
 

Gilhelmi

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Oct 22, 2009
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Hatchet90 said:
This is honestly the first time that I've ever heard of a problem with Abram's and his lens flare. I'm not being sarcastic, I'm not being facetious, I'm only being honest. I can't believe you Bob, judging a movie before a single pen has hit any paper because you didn't like on of Abrams' movies. I liked Super 8 and I loved Star Trek, so I fail to see a single problem with Abrams directing a Star Wars movie. Disney obviously has a lot of faith in Abrams, as do I, because I can guarantee that I could've gotten Joss Whedon if they wanted to (which would also be another excellent choice). I am optimistic about Star Wars: Episode VII.
I will say this STAR TREK was the best STAR WARS movie ever.

STAR TREK was not a Star Trek movie. It did not feel like Star Trek, it had the same characters same ships, but it felt like a Star Wars movie. So I am with you. Star Wars: Ep VII should be good. I will enjoy seeing Bob eat is boots and hat.
 

RTR

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Mar 22, 2008
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Has Jeremy Renner ever done a movie where he looks like he's having a good time? I don't think I've ever seen him smile in a movie.
 

PhunkyPhazon

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Dec 23, 2009
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*insert lens flare joke here*

Oh look, I'm sure I'm totally the first person to make this in the last 24 hours. LAUGH DAMN YOU.

Ugh...sorry, but really, it feels like every post I've seen in the last day from anyone is just a lens flare joke. Can we at least wait for a trailer for the thing before worrying about it?
 

lead sharp

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Nov 15, 2009
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Sorry I stopped watching after the initial comment re JJ Abrams, Bob you were the only person who didn't like Star Trek, this is a good choice!
 

PhunkyPhazon

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lead sharp said:
Sorry I stopped watching after the initial comment re JJ Abrams, Bob you were the only person who didn't like Star Trek, this is a good choice!
Actually, I've been seeing quite a bit of hate for Star Trek '09 since this announcement. I'm not sure if they're just vocal or if there's more people who didn't like it then I thought.

Still, it doesn't really bother me much, and that's all that matters really.
 

omicron1

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So, wait... a film that deconstructs a traditional morality judgment and asks "What if the traditional bad guys were good guys" is "disturbing"? Why is "thought-provoking" or "challenging" reserved only for deconstructions that the reviewer already agrees with, in a "It'll challenge the beliefs of any rube smart enough to buy a ticket" sense?

Anyway. Sounds like it pretty much does what it says on the tin.
 

RJ 17

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Nov 27, 2011
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DVS BSTrD said:
You can be damn sure I remember the Brothers Grimm Movie Bob.
I'm pretty sure everyone remembers what the real witch hunts were like Bob, but I don't think anyone really cares in this film's context. I mean, it's not like anyone was going to this movie expecting the Spanish Inquisition.
I can only imagine this has already been done in the 3 pages of comments, but just in case it hasn't......

(Edit: Bah, the clip of that beloved Monty Python quote won't play. Suffice to say, Devious, NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION! :3)

:p Sorry, just couldn't resist.

OT: My only problem with Bob's argument about the witch hunts is that when you think of the average movie-goer, just how many do you honestly believe are going to walk out of that movie saying "Wow, that was just insensitive to the horrific injusticies done to women during ACTUAL witch hunts"? If you ask me they're more likely to walk out thinking "Wow, I remember that fairy tale about the candy house and the kids that pushed the old lady into the fire. This was a fun/lame/actiony/insertadjectivehere spinoff of that story."
 

Rogue Chedder

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Bob you're clever enough to not have to make the same one liner on both Twitter and your videos. If you're really running short of original material may I suggest less tweeting, sometimes my feed is cluttered by you. Not really complaining, just saying.
 

Le_Lisra

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Jun 6, 2009
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It boggles my mind that anyone gives a shit about this dumb "van Helsing meets Brothers Grimm" movie OR the news about Star Wars.
 

Basement Cat

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Jul 26, 2012
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Gilhelmi said:
??? *thinking**thinking****thinking*

Yes, took me a minute to get that reference, your right. They did add more weight to the "interrogation" device until the person confessed to witchcraft. Everyone confessed eventually.
Giles Corey [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giles_Corey] is the man you're thinking of.

No, he never confessed. He died. "More weight" were his last words.

That's why he's remembered while so many others aren't. He never broke and "confessed" just to escape the torture.