Ever Gotten Caught..... You Know..........

[IzisviAziria]

......But..w..its just....i'm completely speechless at how weird this is....

There are stranger things to have records for I'm sure of it, people never cease to find ways of disturbing me

I literally can't think of anything stranger

And that's exactly why they do it. Because all of us who do it, think that it's strange that all of you who don't think it's weird that we do.

I'm not telling you to masturbate. I'm just telling you not to tell those who do that it's weird. Because it's definitely not. 98% of preteen/teen/adult men do it, and most of those have to feel some sort of embarrassment or shame about it if it gets discovered they do. Pretty fucked up if you ask me.

So I support these outspoken masturbatory groups. Let it be known! We Jerk Off! And We Like It!

OT: No, I have never been caught... I've had some close calls though. A lot of close calls. So many, in fact, that I'm pretty sure my mom/dad just sorta got the idea at some point and decided to leave me alone at certain times. I prefer it that way though. I don't care that they know I do it, but that doesn't mean walking in on it would be a pleasant experience.. Best left as an unspoken agreement.

 

[Simple Bluff]

No....because i dont do it....

You're missing out on a pretty enjoyable past-time then...

OT- No I haven't. And I've never locked a door either.

it's considered a passtime now??

Probobly not, but its always been considered a good way to briefly relieve stress. And natural.

Easy way to put yourself to sleep >.>

Actually, now that I think about it, yeah. But you might wake up to a sticky matress, which isn't particularly pleseant.

I feel dirty.

 

[Sizzle Montyjing]

I have to admit...what you just said is pretty funny....i hope you don't find that offensive..

What did i say that was pretty funny?
Because EVERYTHING i say is meant to be funny.
Oh and to stay on topic, i caught my dad looking at porn, but he didn't notice that i noticed
Seriously, the rest of the males in my family make me look like a genius!
And no vanguard, whatever it was, i didn't find it offensive, because i'm a pretty laid back person.

 

[cerealnmuffin]

Not sure if this fits but my mom thought she had caught me. In secret I would wear my sister's dress because being tg and all, identifying as a girl. She was annoyed my door was locked and for me scrambling to undress out of the dress which made it take a moment for me to unlock the door, me pleading for her to wait a moment (my parents would often use a pin to unlock doors cause they frowned upon locked doors) and rustling noses. So yeah she thought I was doing that one thing and I couldn't have told her the truth that no, just dressing as a girl and modeling in front of mirror lol.

 

[Pinkamena]

God, yeah, that happened to me a while back.

I got home from college and thought no-one was home.

Went to the computer, brought up YouTube and started blasting MLP:FiM & singing along to the theme tune, shouting "IT'S PONY TIME, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!"

My mother was home.

OT: Nah, I've always been careful with my... activities.

Dear lord, that would be so embarrassing. It's one way to come out of the pony closet though.

 

[GoldenFish]

Once when it was very obvious what I was doing and in the middle of the day (I was 12 and REALLY bored) and a couple other times where I'm not sure if anyone actually knew. Locking my door isn't an option since my parents would ask some very strange questions if I got a lock on my door.

Yep.

 

[Vangaurd227]

......But..w..its just....i'm completely speechless at how weird this is....

There are stranger things to have records for I'm sure of it, people never cease to find ways of disturbing me

I literally can't think of anything stranger

And that's exactly why they do it. Because all of us who do it, think that it's strange that all of you who don't think it's weird that we do.

I'm not telling you to masturbate. I'm just telling you not to tell those who do that it's weird. Because it's definitely not. 98% of preteen/teen/adult men do it, and most of those have to feel some sort of embarrassment or shame about it if it gets discovered they do. Pretty fucked up if you ask me.

So I support these outspoken masturbatory groups. Let it be known! We Jerk Off! And We Like It!

OT: No, I have never been caught... I've had some close calls though. A lot of close calls. So many, in fact, that I'm pretty sure my mom/dad just sorta got the idea at some point and decided to leave me alone at certain times. I prefer it that way though. I don't care that they know I do it, but that doesn't mean walking in on it would be a pleasant experience.. Best left as an unspoken agreement.

....no i wasn't saying that masturbating is weird in general...i was referring to the world record

 

[spartandude]

Well my mum walked in the house when me and one of my ex gf were going at it, because of the noise we didnt hear her come in, but unfortunately she could hear the noise

 

[Jonluw]

Nope.
Never walked in on my parents either. I'm the master of avoiding forming awkward childhood memories.

 

[Nyaliva]

No, I was always careful. See doors have these things on them now called "locks"...

Seriously though, no, I've always kept my private time private. And I've stopped doing it now so I'm pretty much in the clear!

*Mum finds this post and decides to chat*

 

[goldendriger]

Uh not that i recall, but i know my parents schedule so i tend to ninja fap around that, 8.00 mum leaves, 9.00 dad leaves, 11-1.00 dad comes home so im good for 2 hours to stroke the pink panther, also i do it before i go to sleep and i tend to go to sleep at like 3.00am so i have plenty of time to play with my little pony ;D

 

[Nyaliva]

Nope.
Never walked in on my parents either. I'm the master of avoiding forming awkward childhood memories.

I know hey, I never even got "The Talk" from my parents, I learnt about sex from a dictionary and the reproductive system from a health class.

 

[Ekonk]

No, but it did happen during actual sex.

Quite the timing, I tell you.

 

[Vitor Goncalves]

I can't be the only one who thought this was going to be a disguised MLP thread, can I?! -_-

OT: No.

I thought of My little ponei too, lol.

OT: I never got caught, thank you for locked doors.

 

[snowpuppy]

No....because i dont do it....

You're missing out on a pretty enjoyable past-time then...

OT- No I haven't. And I've never locked a door either.

it's considered a passtime now??

Probobly not, but its always been considered a good way to briefly relieve stress. And natural.

Well i'm just glad that its not considered a professional sport yet

Would it be an endurance sport than or...
O.T No, I have not been caught slapping the salami.

 

[StBishop]

Thought this was going to be sex. I've never been caught masturbating.

I have been caught in the middle of sex.

You're one of these people who has to one up a story aren't you?

You caught caught masturbating? I got caught doinking!

lol

OT: Nah, I've got really good ears. I can hear if someones coming to the door or anything.

To an extent, yeah.
I wouldn't have said it if I'd not come in expecting to say it though.

But yeah, it's pretty uncommon to get caught masturbating I would imagine. How many people had parents that didn't knock for this exact reason?

 

[sam42ification]

I've been caught three times. Now i'm a pro. I could write a book on masterbation. Techniques, silencing climaxes, including other people and how to close porn and pull up pants in less than a second.

......But..w..its just....i'm completely speechless at how weird this is....

There are stranger things to have records for I'm sure of it, people never cease to find ways of disturbing me

I literally can't think of anything stranger

And that's exactly why they do it. Because all of us who do it, think that it's strange that all of you who don't think it's weird that we do.

I'm not telling you to masturbate. I'm just telling you not to tell those who do that it's weird. Because it's definitely not. 98% of preteen/teen/adult men do it, and most of those have to feel some sort of embarrassment or shame about it if it gets discovered they do. Pretty fucked up if you ask me.

So I support these outspoken masturbatory groups. Let it be known! We Jerk Off! And We Like It!

OT: No, I have never been caught... I've had some close calls though. A lot of close calls. So many, in fact, that I'm pretty sure my mom/dad just sorta got the idea at some point and decided to leave me alone at certain times. I prefer it that way though. I don't care that they know I do it, but that doesn't mean walking in on it would be a pleasant experience.. Best left as an unspoken agreement.

....no i wasn't saying that masturbating is weird in general...i was referring to the world record

I'm really not suprised by this. You just have to look at it through some one else point of view. You raise money for charity and you get to masterbate in a public place. It's not strange it's just seeing what you can get away with...

 

[ReservoirAngel]

I've endured such a moment, but luckily at that point I'd already endured an even more awkward one, by a large margin in fact. Let's just say... my mum accidentally walked in on me introducing someone else to my palm sisters *shifty eyes*

 

[Jonluw]

Nope.
Never walked in on my parents either. I'm the master of avoiding forming awkward childhood memories.

I know hey, I never even got "The Talk" from my parents, I learnt about sex from a dictionary and the reproductive system from a health class.

Neither did I.
I did attend a dinner party where my parents started discussing with their friends whether they'd had 'the talk' with their kids, and whether they had had 'the talk' with their own parents.

I now know that my mother never had 'the talk' but my dad did (he got it from his grandmother).
I sort of wish I didn't.

Spoiler: Also, Smbc never fails to be relevant:

 

[Jezzascmezza]

No, I haven't, and I probably never will because I don't "do it."
Never really seen the appeal, personally.