Explosion On Uwe Boll Film Fails to Stop Uwe Boll Film

[Sfumato]

Hay! News from my home town!

Yeah, guys, I actually live in Maple Ridge, and this DOSN'T surprise me. You've never heard of Maple Ridge, but it's actually Everywhere, USA. We've been in more movies than I can count, and I have probably appeared in the background of more flicks than Van Damme has been in action movies. You know the mall in Juno? Yeah, that's 30 mins away from Maple Ridge. I was there when they were filming. We're seriously EVERYWHERE.

In short, explosion like this had to happen eventually, I mean, they have explosions in the US, right?

 

[Wraithsight]

I do take every chance to post this. Sign it. It will take 2 minutes of your time and help improve the world.
http://www.petitiononline.com/RRH53888/petition.html

 

[BarbaricGoose]

You know, I admire Uwe Boll. Anyone who has the balls to keep making movies, despite the fact that everyone seems to hate them is pretty cool in my nonexistent book of cool people.

Keep it up, Uwe. You're great!

 

[soren7550]

I think this may sum up the situation nicely:

 

[Quiet Stranger]

Too bad it didn't kill Uwe

 

[teisjm]

Ok the C4 didn't work, switching to the 50. Cal!

I have always told you, WE NEEDED ROCKET LAUNCHERS!

I'm writing a petition to the generals in charge of the US/russia collaborative orbital ion cannon sattelite project (they decided true WOMD's should be split between them to keep china in check, witghout a new cold war between russia and america) If they are persuaded by my points, that should do the trick.

Come on guys, the contract clearly states we have to make it look like an accident. Ranooth, the C4 was a great idea, but someone messed up with the timer. Yes, I'm looking at you Not G. Ivingname. I know you wanted the rocket launchers but we decided against them, remember? You can't put this mission in jeopardy just because you want to use rocket launchers, the career of Zach Ward is at stake. Teisjm, I just got off the phone with the generals and they're ready to go, but they want $10,000 up front, 2 rocket launchers from Not G. Ivingname's collection and your gerbil. If we can get them this they'll make it look like global warming waporized Uwe Boll.

To see that, i'd happily pay up 10k, no problem.

 

[Fursnake]

"The new movie from Uwe Boll"

Was I the only one who shuddered when I read that?

Hope the injured make quick recoveries, and put up a lawsuit against Mr. Boll. Maybe lawyers might shut him down?

LOL, I noticed that line and just couldn't believe it. Is that seriously how one wants top advertise their movie, as "The New Movie From Uew Bol" like he's some celebrated film maker or something, which is a truly hilarious premise hehe.

The plot sound stupid, modern day soldier gets sent back in time to medieval times to fulfill a prophecy blah blah etc etc. Am I the only one who thinks that sounds a bit like the basic plot of Army of Darkness?

 

[SovietX]

I thought Uwe Boll had died ages ago. Maybe I was just dreaming...

Seriously, we need to shut this fucker down.

OT: Hope injured recover, possibly sue Uwe "Movie Destroyer" Boll.

 

[skywalkerlion]

Boll's had too much experience with bombs to have let this happen.

*applause*

Way to go XD

 

[Baresark]

My only real question is this.... has this guy ever had a successful movie?

I have inadvertently seen many of his movies, but none have been good. Sometimes, if I want to watch something really cheesy and campy, he is a perfect directorial pick, but I can safely say I'm not looking for anything good, mostly something to make fun of when I watch movies like that.

 

[Infernai]

Ok the C4 didn't work, switching to the 50. Cal!

I have always told you, WE NEEDED ROCKET LAUNCHERS!

I'm writing a petition to the generals in charge of the US/russia collaborative orbital ion cannon sattelite project (they decided true WOMD's should be split between them to keep china in check, witghout a new cold war between russia and america) If they are persuaded by my points, that should do the trick.

Come on guys, the contract clearly states we have to make it look like an accident. Ranooth, the C4 was a great idea, but someone messed up with the timer. Yes, I'm looking at you Not G. Ivingname. I know you wanted the rocket launchers but we decided against them, remember? You can't put this mission in jeopardy just because you want to use rocket launchers, the career of Zach Ward is at stake. Teisjm, I just got off the phone with the generals and they're ready to go, but they want $10,000 up front, 2 rocket launchers from Not G. Ivingname's collection and your gerbil. If we can get them this they'll make it look like global warming waporized Uwe Boll.

...This better freaking work, our client is getting impatient. Oh well, atleast it's bound to be better then the plan of trying to kill him by letting loose a guinea pig in his house to try and eat him. As for the $10 000...well alright you can take it out of my bank account, the rocket launchers will have to come from elsewhere and as for the gerbil, well...wait why do they want a gerbil? 0o

 

[Burnhardt]

Where does this man find money to make these terrible terrible films, surley no one in their right mind or out of it would bankroll him?

I believe he finances them himself, using some German tax law that allows movie investors to claim 50% of the money back from the government.