Fish & Chips!

[SckizoBoy]

But nay, it is not for me. WEEP FOR ME ESCAPIST! D=

Weep?! Not a chance, we will indulge in schadenfreude while we savour each morsel of deep friend potatoe sprinkled with salt and drizzled with vinegar. Haha! *chomp*

Haha, actually thats a genunine (minus the gastro pub) conversation i overheard my uncle having. Im thinking of using it somewhere, possibly making a light-hearted northen comedy for BBC2 XD

HA! Priceless, man, I wish I could've heard that!

Why are there no chip shops that deliver at half one in the morning. Damn this thread.

I have a friend who has his own deep-fryer, solves a few such problems for him, I'm sure!

 

[HazzaH]

I had a social studies teacher when I moved over to NZ from England, who swore Fish and Chips with 'real' chips were invented by NZ, which is why they're considered a 'kiwi icon'. (Which is a crock of shite, btw, as everyone knows.)

But OP's post reassures me that 'fush and chups' are but the palest imitation of the real thing!

 

[emeraldrafael]

I rejrect your rules, as a Pittsburgher you cant not eat hienz ketchup. Thats literally like not eating fish and chips and being a brit.

Other then that... meh. I dont like styrofoam just cause its a mess to clean and you cant burn it. plus its fragile. I much like a nice aluminum foil. also a use of a fork is pathetic, if you cant eat it with the knife you cut it with, then theres no reason to eat it at all. and actually that wooden fork looks realy flimsy.

 

[BristolBerserker]

RULE BRITANNIA!!!

 

[Jake Lewis Clayton]

Just noticed something you have said wrong.

The salt has to go on before the vinegar, and theres a reason for this, the lashings of vinegar will wash to salt into every crevice imaginable.

All finished off by some lovely thick lancashire gravy. (well it's actually from a chinese take away but michael is great with english food).

 

[Shakomaru]

This made my day. And now I'm hungry. I only know this phrase because of The Wind In The Willows though, cause I'm a lousy American who puts lemon juice on all the fishes.

 

[Gaiseric]

Daystar you are a persuasive bastard. You just convinced this 'Merican to try Fish and Chips.

 

[Knight Captain Kerr]

I had really good fish and chips with salt, vinegar and red sauce in a pub in Dundee last week. It was very tasty.

 

[LarenzoAOG]

Yes, the meal of kings, fish & chips has fed the proud nation of the UK for millions of years (proven by scientific methods of science). There are, however, rules that must be followed.

Yes, rules. The favourite word of the Germans and least favourite of the French. Without these rules the very fabric of time will collapse in on itself, and that would ruin everyone's day.

Rule the first: The fish & chips must be placed in a holding device made completely from paper, not a polystyrene carton, for that way leads to madness. Newspaper is the material of choice, for it is said that the ink of British newspaper preserves and enhances flavour (scientific fact proven through methods of science).


Rule the second: There are only two condiments worthy of such an honour of being dispersed on the holy meal of holiness, salt & vinegar. Only a trained fish & chips fryer knows the perfect method of applying these condiments, but our trained scientists (in the method of science) have an idea.

It is theorised that the vingegar must first be liberally applied on the fish & chips. This will act as an adhesive for which the salt can anchor to in order to release the Flavour of Science[sub]TM[/sub].

The protectors of taste


Any other condiments, in particular, the demon tomato kethchup, will destroy the flavour of the fish & chips, triggering the great food armageddon. This must be avoided or jolly good times will be put to an end.

The enemy


Rule the third: The fish & chips must be consumed with the use of a two-pronged wooden fork. This is non-negotiable.

The eating utensil of kings


By following these three simple rules (proven by scientific scientists to be 100% scientifically proven), you too can enjoy the meal of kings.

Union flag optional

Sir, the closest I've ever been to UK is Paris (not a place for Fish &Cips as I've learned in my travels) but having lived in Germany for 6 years I happen to know for a fact that many German scientists and chefs have toiled for hours in their labs and I believe have found a way to create a very fine replica of your beloved Fish n Chips.

And I'm sure you'll be happy to know that know German citizen would ever stoop so low as to put any kind of tomato based sauce on such a magical and scientific treat as Fish n Chips.

Being of a Scottish background I can tell you the only reason I respect the English people is because they invented proper football and Fish n Chips. Carry on you magnificent bastards.

 

[Asmundr]

Love the stuff. Which I could get it more where I live haha!

 

[Joshimodo]

Yes indeed.


And forget not the trusty comrades, the sausage in batter and saveloys.


Also, putting your hands on the glass after being out in the cold for hours. You remember.




How to identify more upmarket, posh chippies: "Wrapped or open?"

 

[geK0]

I prefer lemon juice to vinegar, is that acceptable?

 

[Hollock]

You will not like those in the east of Scotland who put mayonnaise on their chips, that's what the chippy ask them!

IT'S BLASPHEME!

I know one person who does that, and another who puts mayonnaise on their hot dogs. I'd be more appropriate to call them animals. Though I've never had fish and chips ('Cuz I'm American. My two friends weren't though.)

If you ever holiday near me I will personally direct you to a good chippy and give you the money for it. That's how much you're missing.

I'm in. I'll start saving for the trip right now. It's going to be great! Escapism 2013:Chippy's revenge!

 

[Dr_Komeil]

I was with you up until the two pronged wooden fork. I eat with my hands, like a man! (Or a monkey!) Everything else I agree with (And I'm Amer'can). It drives me mad to order fish 'n chips, and have people stare at me in disbelief when I ask for malt vinegar. Added to that, anyone who puts catchup on meat that is not ground, or from a chicken, is a madman/woman.

 

[remnant_phoenix]

Ahh... Fish and Chips... Drizzled with vinegar and salt... The breakfast/lunch/dinner/late night meal of champions.

 

[Fbuh]

Yes, rules. The favourite word of the Germans and least favourite of the French.

Could've sworn that "courage" was the least favourite word of the French...

But yeah, fish and chips are tasty.

Or shower.

Yes indeed, I could live (not for long) on fish and chips. I am American, though, so the only place I can find such a wonder food is at a restaurant.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

Sorry Brtis, I'm Aussie and allergic to seafood so I must substitute the fish in my Fish & Chips with a lovely battered sav

If there has ever been a fouler creature than yourself, I have yet to hear of it.

I usually skip the fish and have lamb yiros (yes yes, that's "gyros"... I can't help it if South Australia's Greek immigrants were illiterate) with extra garlic sauce.

Good thing about fish and chips in Oz is that 'butterfish' (generic fish you get when you don't order a specific fish type) is almost always shark (school shark to be precise). I do admit to being partial to a nice piece of flake now and then.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

I prefer lemon juice to vinegar, is that acceptable?

Sure, if you drink chardonnay.

 

[Tiger Sora]

Ahh yes Fish and chips. Though maybe in England, the Ketchup rule does not apply for Canadian's. We love to lather our food in it. It's the national condiment and a must for many foods. And England you can't tell us otherwise. For we have poutine, the deadliest meal known to man. The Quebec war machine is fueled by it and if they could get up of their couch once finished, would control half the world. And I don't hear of the English willing to kill themselves by eating a 12000 calorie meal in one go. We are the Storm Troopers, the bravest of the brave, and shall do what we please with our food.

 

[Aeriath]

You will not like those in the east of Scotland who put mayonnaise on their chips, that's what the chippy ask them!

IT'S BLASPHEME!

The Scots were always a little strange.

I blame the French.

It is a strange land we live in, full of alien customs. I mean go into a chippy in Edinburgh and they may ask you if you want brown sauce! Brown sauce! And you thought putting your fish supper in a carton was a dangerous concept!

But yeh, all this talk is making me hungry. I'm all in the mood to run to the chippy that's just across the road now!

Brown sauce on Fish and Chips is GLORIOUS. I've never been able to get a proper Fish and Chips in Glasgow as they rarely carry brown sauce.

I now really want some but as it is 3:30 am the local chippy is closed. Curses!