Fox News Links Dark Souls to "Craigslist Killer"

[major_chaos]

Snip

Oh shut up you, with your facts and such, everybody knows that only old, stupid, racist, homophobic, christian, gun toting psychos watch Fox, while attractive, amazing, smart people watch real unbiased news. Like MSNBC which has no bias what so ever. *end sarcasm*
I'm also 99% positive that other news channels have done the "X is evil and will HARM YOUR CHILDREN" bullshit, but if its not got Fox in the title it doesn't generate hits and therefore isn't worth posting.

 

[RJ 17]

The really sad thing is that she didn't even gain that many humanity points for her murders.

....

Too soon?

Anyways, as the first commentor said: the game is much too recent to be connected with any of these killings. Oh, and the fact that Satan has absolutely nothing to do with the game kinda discredits this as well, and from what I've heard of the story she's claiming to have been part of a satanic cult and these killings were all part of bloody rituals.

 

[The Material Sheep]

The really sad thing is that she didn't even gain that many humanity points for her murders.

....

Too soon?

Anyways, as the first commentor said: the game is much too recent to be connected with any of these killings. Oh, and the fact that Satan has absolutely nothing to do with the game kinda discredits this as well, and from what I've heard of the story she's claiming to have been part of a satanic cult and these killings were all part of bloody rituals.

Well..... you do murder god, and either take his place as or send the world into absolute darkness.

Plenty of material for religious paranoia and sensationalism. Plenty of non existent subtext to over analyze.

 

[FancyNick]

Dark Souls' satanic influence is unbounded by the laws of time and space. Burn it before it claims another victim!

Really though, I love the game and this is just utter nonsense. Only thing Dark Souls made want to do is curl into the fetal position and cry.

 

[Something Amyss]

While there is a lot of death in Dark Souls, most of it is your own

But just think about how cheap that makes life seem! You're programmed to not care about life, and therefore murder is okay!

....Or something. I don't know, trying to think like Fox News gives my brain serious trauma.

 

[Something Amyss]

Dark Souls' satanic influence is unbounded by the laws of time and space. Burn it before it claims another victim!

Well, they blamed Obama for the economy failing before he took office. Which proves Obama's a Time Lord. And since DS bends time and space, video games are clearly part of his sinister plan.

BARROWM... I mean, OBAMA!

*shakes fist*

 

[BlumiereBleck]

I think the Escapist and Fox are in bed together because I see more articles from Fox than on any other site I'm on. So that's free advertisement, I guess.

 

[TheMigrantSoldier]

Well, I initiated a campaign of real life mosquito genocide, going out of my way to kill anything small that flies, after Blighttown. Does that count?

 

[Adept Mechanicus]

Satanic ritual murder AND violent video games? It's a moral panic crossover! I've heard of the media trying to create moral panics out of nothing, but I've never heard of them trying to connect two together at once. This must be a REALLY slow news day.

 

[00slash00]

Don't get me wrong, this is stupid. I mean really really stupid. But for Fox News, the fact that they haven't yet said that Dark Souls is the sole (no pun intended) cause of the murders, is downright reasonable for them

 

[Yopaz]

Ok so she is 19 right now.

First murder at 13

19-13 = 6

2014 - 6 = 2008
Or let's take 2013, since DS came out in October so that would be 2007

Dark Souls came out in 2011.

So either she is a time traveler, or he is full of shit. Personally, i go for the second option. But its fox, did anyone expect anything else?

So basically what you have proven here is that murder leads to people playing video games? Which means it's the opposite of what we've always known. Gamers aren't potential murderers, we are murderers and we need to be stopped before we escalate to doing things like playing Dark Souls 2! Thank god someone discovered this.

 

[Kurt Cristal]

Fox news you say? This picture sums it up well enough.

Spoiler

I mean, I'll give faux news some credit for being occasionally being reliable for fiscal news, but anything else? Bollocks.

 

[unstabLized]

1. Fox news.

2. "We do know that she has an affinity for the fantasy game called Dark Souls, which is a very dark, death-laden video game that's on PlayStation and other kinds of video-type things where there's a lot of killing involved."


That's enough to close the case, put on a "Beware: Lots of bullshit involved" stamp, and call for a /thread.

Have a good night ladies and gents! *Tips hat*

 

[TheDoctor455]

Next from Fox News:

All powerful video games can manipulate time and space to influence the emotions and decision making of people regardless of their relative location in the continuum.

Back in the 80s and 90s I went through changes that eventually left me as a skeptical, cynical asshole with a bleak outlook on life... I BLAME YOU BANNER SAGA.

And the frustrating platforming segments from the original Half-Life drove Dahmer to cannibalism.

 

[Abomination]

Dark Souls didn't come out in 2007.

Case closed.

And there ya go.

But of course you must remember what station we're talking about and the demographic that watches it.

 

[kurokenshi]

Who let the trolls(fox) out?

 

[Dalisclock]

"Video type things" sounds like something you'd hear in the 1980's, but then again, I'm pretty sure most of the people at Fox News have never played anything since Pac Man. Not to mention the "Satanic Cult" BS which few people have taken seriously since the 1980's.

Which lends credence to my theory that Fox News lives Perpetually in the 1980's, possibly ruled by Ronald Reagen.

 

[Nathan Josephs]

Its Fox News only stupid people take them seriously.