Generally Accepted Gaming Facts

[Octorok]

Players always stockpile rare/powerful consumables for "a time they'll really need it" and never end up using them.

Not always true. Many's the time I've fallen back on an uber-item in a tight spot.

Fallout 3 - "Whassis? Big-ass mutant wants to eat a my-brain-sandwich, huh?" *NUKE GO BOOM*

OT : Honestly, the red barrel thing is out of hand. Apparently players just have to have explosive red barrels - if you change the colours, they don't *get* it.

 

[nifedj]

If you got a new item/weapon just before a boss, it's the boss's only weakness.

RPG protagonists have bottomless invisible pockets.

Enemies in games with a stealth element have short attention spans, an even shorter memory and incredibly poor situational awareness. ("I could have sworn that my guard buddy was beside me a moment ago...")

 

[Nocturnal Gentleman]

Every animal in nature no matter how big or small will try to kill you.

If you get shot you can take some pills and/or walk it off.

Machines hate humans. Just because.

Major vehicle accidents won't kill you 90% of the time.

 

[Zipa]

PC and console gamers all hate eachother.
MMOs are designed to eat your time.

 

[Macabre9037]

Red barrels explode.

Unless you are in Saints Row, in which case the white ones do.

 

[Karma168]

Call of Duty, God of War, Fallout,etc are all considered the first of their genre and any game that is similar is a clone and can never be as good as the 'original'

 

[Red Alastor]

One character never speaks to other one that the main character, there's a Fight club spoof coming.

 

[TheDarkestDerp]

If it resembles Devil May Cry, chances are it will give me carpal tunnel even on the easiest difficulty.

I don't care if I get a little bonus gift, I will never pre-order a game.

There just some trophies that I was never meant to get (like the "Killing Machine" trophy in Resistance 2 and every trophy you get from DLC).

Agreed on all counts. Especially the DLC... Erfles...

Also-

It's a very good idea to eat all food found on the floor or by the smashing down of weaker walls.

Male supersoldiers will always come equipped with the latest in combat gear, harnesses, armor, holsters and headwear when appropriate, whereas their female counterparts will continue to try sneaking out the front door wearing masking tape. (Though some developers are getting better on this one.)

If you can pick up a chainsaw it will NOT be used for cutting wood.

In a "Street Fight" -

- the biggest, strongest male will always be the slowest for some reason.

- if you can't inexplicably throw an energy projectile somehow, you'll either be tiny and incredibly fast or the aforementioned hulking behemoth.

- if you hail from a country with an ethnic stereotype, you will BE that stereotype. IE: if you're "Duivil", a legendary kickboxing champ from der Nederlands, you will have an affinity for cheese, tulips and wooden shoes... probably even live in or near a windmill...

- you will never be able to perform as well with a "Boss" character as the computer does.

Fists, farm tools and cutting melee weapons are equally or more damaging/dangerous than firearms, though numerous peasant uprising in history have proven this a VERY foolhardy belief...

and finally

When the enemy aliens/foreigners bomb your base and destroy everything, somehow they will ALWAYS miss the one experimental super fighter which has more firepower than Zeus, Charles Bronson and the Death Star put together...

 

[gibboss28]

Apparently Biowares RPGs are some of the best.

 

[Blitzwarp]

No matter how many members of Rhino Squad escort you anywhere, you will still only be the last man standing about midway through any given level in Quake IV.

If there's a mysteriously derelict spaceship that shows up on your scanners in a region that has a negative effect on radio signals, it's not a good idea to go on board. Ever.

Underwater levels suck.

Whenever anybody you've not met before calls you over the radio to say they're your friend, they're not. They're either a machine or fictional.

 

[GiantRaven]

When a Bioware game autosaves you are about to get fucked up bigtime.

 

[nuba km]

People will hate a popular game/franchise for no other reason than the fact that it's popular.The more popular it is the more haters it will have

I only dislike games where they reach a point that they are popular because they are popular *cough*CoD*cough* and most of the time those games are mediocre and their are better games of the same type.

 

[VanityGirl]

Good graphics will mean a game will sell thousands of copies even if it stinks.

(I'm looking at you GTAIV)

 

[Dragonforce525]

All remakes of old SNES/NES/Megadrive games will suck.

Years old meat found in a cave/sewer/dungeon will heal you.

 

[nuba km]

Male supersoldiers will always come equipped with the latest in combat gear, harnesses, armor, holsters and headwear when appropriate, whereas their female counterparts will continue to try sneaking out the front door wearing masking tape. (Though some developers are getting better on this one.)

I couldn't help but notice your avatar when you said this.

also make a game with a half way good story and average gameplay it will be seen as the messiah of games *cough*half-life*cough*

 

[scorptatious]

In most Final Fantasy games,the female lead is almost always a white mage/summoner, and almost always gets kidnapped at least once.

EDIT:

All remakes of old SNES/NES/Megadrive games will suck.

Final Fantasy 4 DS and Chrono Trigger DS say hi.

 

[StreetBushido]

A thing about RPG games: it's completely normal to pull off the equipment from the guy you just killed and then put that equipment on. The fact that you just killed that person, usually by stabbing, slashing, fireballing and generally messing up won't affect the equipment at all. Also, nobody will comment on you walking around with bloodstained weapons and armor.

I know that some newer games are starting to use equipment that degrades, but still... It's kinda funny.

 

[Addendum_Forthcoming]

Games will always seem better if they're from 10+ years ago, if only because of nostalgia when older gamers say 'Back before <insert new peripheral/console/trend>....'

 

[MikailCaboose]

The Water Temple is equivalent to receiving a colonoscopy from Edward Scissorhands

It did hurt, but not that bad... I mean, my ass is still intact. Mostly...

- Bioware RPGs will always be awesome (and I will always buy them).
- Valve takes about 50 years to make any game, but you will play it for as long a time.
- Direct movie adaptations suck
- The cake is a lie

Indeed. The Great Bay Temple is much worse.

MMO's will always be looked down upon by people like Yahtzee.
[sub]yeah, it's not that great but still[/sub]