"Get a life!"

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Benny Blanco

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Oh, OP, have you no sense of irony or self-awareness?
Discussing what it means to have a life in an online gaming forum?

So yeah, some people associate "having a life" with going out and getting tanked and others would rather go on WoW and BE the Tank.

Different strokes for different folks, right?

Or not. It's actually healthy to have more than one outlet for your energy and time, because you will inevitably meet more than one type of person and encounter more than one type of worldview.

I'm a complete nerd and have been since I was a pre-teen. I was, however, the best-adjusted of the Tabletop RPG crowd at my school (not exactly a grand boast) because I was also into musical styles which were big identifiers in the 90s (punk and hip-hop) and because of a shared interest in these areas with completely different social groups, meaning that I had other frames of reference.

Someone cited the 2-Dimensional "Bro" as an example of someone who might level an accusation of having no life, whilst justifying themselves with their girlfriend and their gym activity.

Such a person may be a worse offender than the typical nerd- see MovieBob's excellent video on Sports Fandom vs. Nerd Fandom- in that he lets aspects of his life dominate it. Moreover, by hanging out only with other "Bros" he is living in Plato's cave as much as the nerds he despises.


Vexik said:
Now I remember why I stopped reading forum posts... they make me feel old. All these vitriolic posts about partiers and drinkers remind me of being young and defensive and full of self-righteousness.

Getting a life, when I use it, means a rounded existence. I've got more nerd cred than a d20 labelled in binary, and I grew up as insular and protected as I could be. I needed to get a life! As time wore on, I began talking to people I wasn't introduced to and who clearly shared few if any interests with me. I went to parties - of various kinds - and tried to experience many different things. Now I've got plenty going on in many different ways, and I don't think anyone would tell me to get a life just because I play video games - but that's because I do a lot of other things, too.

Variety is the spice of life, and that holds no truer than when applied to experiences. Spice it up, Escapists!
Absolutely what this guy said.

At the present, I spend time:

Finishing my Master's Degree
Writing (both fiction and non-fiction)
Working out at the gym
Running tabletop RPGs
Sitting on the board of a human rights organisation
Spending time with my girlfriend
Teaching (and continuing to study) martial arts
Playing games on my PC or PSP

Now, what works for me may not work for you and vice versa: you may find martial arts boring, prefer drawing to writing and decide that a Vibrator/Fleshlight(TM) and all the internet porn you can find is an economically preferable decision to finding a partner. Be aware, however, that doing the same thing all the time is dull and will make you dull in turn.

Do something new and meet some new people. This is the life that you have, and it is up to you to make the most of it.
 

Vault101

I'm in your mind fuzz
Sep 26, 2010
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get life huh?


but in all seriousness I hate that bullshit term...its essentially saying "be like me!!"

now to be fair having freinds and such is a good thing..as for me Im very happy with my interests and how I spend my free time (If I were unemplyed I think I'd go mad though)

as for me...I am happy, but I dont know...I think my problem is I dont have any freinds with whom I share common interests, unfortunatly its not as simple as going to the game store and saying "what games do you like?!...ok then LETS BE FREINDS!....thats not optional"

yesterday I was playing ME3 online...and I was with 3 other guys who knew each other, it was alot more fun because they were all joking and having a great time, ("the cannbals look like quasi-modo..SANCTUARY THIS!!)
 

BOOM headshot65

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TestECull said:
People stopped using this towards me when I told them that A: The right to the pursuit of happiness is right there in our fucking Declaration of Independence[footnote] AT least I think it is. It might be in the preamble. I don't remember at the moment, too sleepy to think clearly.[/footnote]
Its pretty much right there in the first sentance (maybe a few in) "We hold these truths to be self-evident, That amoung these are life, liberty, and The pursuit of happiness.
 

manic_depressive13

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This exact thread has been made before and got the exact same responses. Depending on who says it, 'get a life' means different things. Ultimately it means 'why aren't you doing the things I think you should be doing?' I haven't heard the phrase since high school ended.
 

Rule Britannia

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This phrase occurs after school holidays, right now i'm in "March Break". Since my hobbies aren't very outdoorsie (playing bass, video games, watching movies) I often get accused of having "no life".

I only get acussed of having no life if my friends see me online a lot on Xbox.

In the summer I go to the beach and rock climb but since it's still snowwy in Canada I cannot do those things :'(
 

Vault101

I'm in your mind fuzz
Sep 26, 2010
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manic_depressive13 said:
This exact thread has been made before and got the exact same responses. Depending on who says it, 'get a life' means different things. Ultimately it means 'why aren't you doing the things I think you should be doing?' I haven't heard the phrase since high school ended.
moral of the story is:

highschoolers are insecure shitheads

but yeah, I actually had to do a double check to make sure this wasnt the other thread necro'd..and I that I already posted
 

The Gnome King

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omega 616 said:
I hear this phrase get thrown around a lot in our little culture but what does this or it's opposite phrase "you no lifer!" mean to you?

I think it means you don't "socialize" enough, by which I mean "you don't get drunk and do stupid shit" enough. Is it really that bad not to have a social life?

I don't have a social life, if I am not doing my few hours of voluntary work then I am sat alone in my flat gaming, youtube-ing, job searching or forum-ing.

So what are your thoughts on what is it to have a life, is it bad not to have a social life and what ever else.
Honestly, I spent my 20's partying hard. Really, really hard. I have stories, videotape, pictures, and memories to last me a couple lifetimes. I used to have a house that was like a constant Burning Man experience. Lots of women, some men, rivers of good booze and things I know I'll never experience again.

Ever since right around 30 I honestly just shifted focus in life. I became much, much more introverted; part of this is because last year I moved away from my home of 25 years to another state but part of it is simply that I don't really desire much physical contact with people anymore.

I'm content now to spend weeks not interacting with anyone except my wife, my partner, the bartender at the pub and the grocery girl at the checkout line. I have a nice house with a couple dogs, a few cats, and a nice basement. In that basement is a 4 PC LAN, a sound system to rival anything I've heard in my life, and a video projector system. Not to mention a fridge full of cold beer.

Why the Hell would I want to socialize or leave my house? :D Get a life? This *is* the life!
 

Vault101

I'm in your mind fuzz
Sep 26, 2010
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Xartyve2 said:
My family says that but not to my face. Cowards. They think I can't hear them down here. They're wrong. I'll make them see..one day, when all my plans come into place..THEY'LL see the one who "didn't have a life" weild the power to take and destroy life itself...and THEN who will be laughing?

Wow, that was dark, for me
haha sorry couldnt help myself
 

Total LOLige

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Popadoo said:
Shit like this pisses me off.
Lately I had a chance to talk neutrally with the kind of partying dipshit I would usually ignore. We were both on an exchange and we were stuck with each other for a few hours, so we pretty much had to talk lest we both be bored as fuck. She was shocked when I said I only went out about once every other month, and asked why I don't go to parties.
''I don't see the point.''
''It's fun!''
''I have fun at home.''
''But this is more fun!''
''People experience fun differently.''
''Yeah, but everyone knows parties are the most fun thing!''
It was like talking to a brick wall, she didn't seem to understand some people don't like the same immature shit she does. Then she had the nerve of calling me childish when I told her I played games.
When people say get a life, I feel like yelling in their face; ''I DO HAVE A LIFE, JUST BECAUSE I DON'T GO OUT AND RAPE MY LIVER DOESN'T MEAN I AM SOCIALLY INEPT.''
But I don't.
*Sigh...*
I don't see what's fun about killing yourself slowly. I used to get invited to parties before I was forced to move (that's a story for another time) and one of the main reasons I declined was the 'partying dipshit' girls, it's hard enough being around them when their sober, drunk would be unbearable. "get a life" is a stupid phrase you're still having a life even if it is just playing videogames. Still funner than parties
 

Dethenger

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Anyone who insists that I "socialize" are the gregarious people who can't fathom that I prefer to be alone; the extroverts who think that introversion is somehow something "wrong" with me. Get a life? I have one. It just doesn't involve other people-- and it doesn't have to.
 

Valanthe

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It's ironic, with a little spin mastery, I can turn this around on the 'Neigh'-sayers who say that my hobbies (bet you can guess at least two of them already) equate me to not having a life, to answer this question in it's most recent adaptation, I simply responded to their perceived insult with a question; "So what did you do this weekend?"

Invariably, they answer with something along the lines of "I went to a party and got absurdly intoxicated, Yourself?" Though usually they speak in less refined English. To their question, the answer is usually:

"Well, to begin I went to my local shopping centre, where I held the line against an opposing alien force. After this skirmish, myself and the leader sat down for drinks at the local pubs and discussed the battle and the tactics used over a pint. The next day I went for an exhausting 6km hike up a nearby mounatin, and when I returned, worked on mapping a vast cavern system I had a hand in building, while discussing architectural and technical issues with people from around the world, England, Australia, France, Belgium, America and Canada, to name a few, with whom I am creating a scale recreation of Tolkien's Middle Earth. And finally, on Sunday I went out again, only instead of leading an army, I joined four of my closest friends on a grand adventure, where we took the roles of great heroes partaking on a dangerous but rewarding quest, all crafted from the imaginations of our combined insanity. I believe that was about all."

Their rousing intellectual rebuttal this comparison of our different definitions of what constitutes a 'life' is, "You are such a nerd." I am uncertain whether or not they are jealous that I have a much more fulfilling life, or if it is simply that I make a better a salary than they do.

Captcha: "Run through," why yes, that is very much how they look after my response, how did you know?
 

Zack Alklazaris

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My parents would tell me that all the time. I had to explain to them that I was socializing. I showed them how I was talking to my guild of 120 people 15 of them who I knew very very well. How we would play games and talk about our day, etc. How I had friends from Belgium, Australia, England, Germany, Russia. They still wanted me to go outside and socialize.

Don't understand, I socialized more than pretty much any of my peers. Honestly how many "normal" kids have a 3 way conversation with people on opposite corners of the world. (parents loved that phone bill)
 

JoesshittyOs

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I realized that not "having a life" is when I'm the most comfortable.

Office Space said it best. "If I had a million dollars, I would do nothing"

I'm at the most comfortable I've ever been in my life. I'm doing College classes, and that's literally my only responsibility (besides volunteering every week). I do absolutely nothing all day, and I love it. I never became good friends with the "party" kids at my High School, but I'd be fine with parties if only for the free beer.

I'm not unpopular, I'm just comfortable. I'll spend time with friends (hell, I showed two of my buddies how to smoke weed last week), but I'll mostly just sit on my ass all day.

This is how I want to end my life. But as for right now, I'm sort of just on an extended Summer vacation before I have to get my ass into gear.
 

Brandon237

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I play PC games and get 90% for science and AP maths. I have been told that I need a life a LOT of times. Yet I have one, I have a great girlfriend of a year and a half, a few good friends and I have fun. My liver is going to have a life for a long time too, I don't enjoy dancing and do not intend to get stoned, baked, trippy, drunk or any combination of those. That is just me.

So honestly, when people tell you this, it is time to use the middle finger and a few of the most delightful words you can jam into one sentence.
 

Robert Ewing

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My usual reply is as follows

"I have a life, a pretty good life. It's just at this particular moment in time, I'm sitting at a computer, doing something I like. In fact, the only reason you accuse me of not having a life, is probably because you don't understand anything about people. I can't spend all my time outside socializing 24/7. That would be ludicrous, and cost a lot of fucking money."

There.
 

TheLastSamurai14

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Mar 23, 2011
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Necron_warrior said:
I guess a life is like a cake.

You can have your cake and eat it, but then you have no cake.
Or you can slowly nibble on it, maybe not the same instant enjoyment but the cake lasts longer
Life can also be a lie...

Okay, that was a terrible joke. I'm sorry, guys.

I've got a somewhat better one, though: "Get a life? *****, please. I used the Konami code."

OT: I've got a girlfriend who's into gaming, and all of my friends are hardcore gamers. I don't have as much of the "get a life" crowd at my throat as some other people here. The only people who really care are my parents, and I don't really give a fuck what they think about my gaming habits. I mean yeah, I love my parents, but they really should blame themselves if they blame anyone; I inherited my dad's NES, and most of my consoles (and my PC) were gifts from them, so they're just fueling the fire and not even seeing it.
 

DoomyMcDoom

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I've never had anyone tell me I have no life, least not since I expanded my horizons, and stopped spending 90% of my life sitting in front of a computer, I think a lot of people here would be suprised at how fascinating and fun life outside gaming can be! I have a suggestion, if people tell you you have no life, and your only retort is "fuck off" or "I do have a life, it's just different than yours, You go drinking and I play video games, to each his own." get a non gaming hobby, go hiking, take up fishing, or maybe get into some form of art, pick up a musical instrument, that way you can still not go out drinking and waste your liver, you can still do something you enjoy, but you can add to your list so you can have gaming, and something other people can see as a hobby, AND something you can apply to other life situations, for instance artwork you might be able to sell some of it some day, hiking, well excercise is great also there are some really beautiful places out there to explore, and you can bring art supplies and paint/sculpt stuff you see or gain inspiration to go back to create with, music is always fun to get into, you can express yourself, join a band/group of some sort on weekends or something and just jam with them for fun. ANYTHING that gets you out there...

I know it's easier to deny that these insults affect you or make you feel bad in some way, but really... When it comes down to it, true happiness, is not developed by gaining an achievement in a game, or by getting drunk, or by dancing a lot, or by anything, other than personal achievement and introspectively visible success, in other words, becoming more diverse in your skills, and just becoming more ABLE is far far more satisfying than anything else, so even if you don't want to get social, I would reccomend picking up other hobbies, hell even cooking is a fuckin awesome hobby, if you can make awesome food, you can show off in different ways, say having people over, hosting dinner parties, or cooking for women(seriously guys, women love guys who can cook really tasty food).

I'm sorry if I seem to be a party(thread) pooper, but it's a better use of energy to just go try shit, maybe they're right in some strange perverse way, maybe you aren't experiencing what your life is meant to be like...

One of my hobbies is helping people realize their potential, and helping people improve their lives for their benefit, I don't gain anything other than warm fuzzy feelings, but I love to help people, and I always strive to find new things to try and new skills to gain myself...

Cheers!

P.S. my Capcha is "pizza topping", how the hell does it know that I'm craving pizza!?
 

Johnny Impact

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Usually it means, "anyone who doesn't live the way I do is not as good as I am." It's typically used by smug shitheads to let you know they are smug shitheads.

Perfect example: we had this loudmouth know-it-all guy where I work. He used to put me down because I didn't have a life.

He thought it was bad that I ate sugary foods most days. I needed to "cut that shit off." He went to the bar most nights because he was an alcoholic.

I played tabletop games - gathering friends around a table to roll dice and speculate on stories that never happened. That was "for losers." He was in a fantasy football league, which involved gathering friends and speculating about games that never happened.

My interest in obscure movies was "fuckin' weird," because "nobody should sit on the couch and watch the tube for hours." He watched pro sports religiously.

I could go on for a long time using just this one guy as an example.

I've been told in various ways to get a life by half the people I know. I take it as a good sign. I'm living the way I choose to live. That others can't understand or accept it is a sign of weakness on their part, not a flawed existence on my part. (My existence *is* flawed, but that's a separate discussion.)
 

Hosker

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Aug 13, 2010
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Nobody has ever said it to me, I don't think. People seem to just accept who I am.
 

Jfswift

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I had a 'friend' tell me that once when I was looking at getting a classic trans am. Apparently it wasn't cool enough or something? I think it's a dumb thing to say really though. What makes one hobby better or worse than another?