Google Vs. The English

[ThunderCavalier]

Meh. Sounds like typical Internet.

 

[HerbertTheHamster]

"Define" and "English" probably just brings up a definition of a word in the English language

and **** is probably just really popular

 

[Epic Fail 1977]

Australians have used that as the standard definition for the English for over a century.

Yeah, I've noticed we're not popular "down under". The weird thing about that is that AFAIK Australia is one of the few countries in the world with no particular historical reason to be pissed off at us.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

Australians have used that as the standard definition for the English for over a century.

Yeah, I've noticed we're not popular "down under".

Actually, outside of sporting rivalries, most Aussies don't have a problem with Poms. Actually, that's not entirely true... Most Aussies don't have a problem with most Poms...

The ones we tend to have a problem with are the fucks who are all "convicts this," "empire that," "culture the other" and "you can't get proper chips here." Whinging, complaining, negative fuckrags... and what's worse is they're not all tourists... some of the dipshits have actually migrated here. Of course, with people like that we don't care what country they come from, we just want them to fuck off back there if they hate it here so much.

(Protip - if you ever encounter an Aussie tourist bitching and whinging, tell them they 'sound like a pom at bondi'... that should pull the fucker up short... or possibly start a fist fight. Win-win.)

Other than that, we treat Poms pretty much the same as we treat everyone else.

The weird thing about that is that AFAIK Australia is one of the few countries in the world with no particular historical reason to be pissed off at us.

Actually, Australia has several historical reasons but that's neither here nor there because most Aussies don't give a fuck, only fuckwit ultranationalists... or 4th generation 'Irish' who've just discovered their 'Irish Pride' (who you can ignore or set on fire).

 

[Epic Fail 1977]

Australians have used that as the standard definition for the English for over a century.

Yeah, I've noticed we're not popular "down under".

Actually, outside of sporting rivalries, most Aussies don't have a problem with Poms. Actually, that's not entirely true... Most Aussies don't have a problem with most Poms...

The ones we tend to have a problem with are the fucks who are all "convicts this," "empire that," "culture the other" and "you can't get proper chips here." Whinging, complaining, negative fuckrags... and what's worse is they're not all tourists... some of the dipshits have actually migrated here. Of course, with people like that we don't care what country they come from, we just want them to fuck off back there if they hate it here so much.

(Protip - if you ever encounter an Aussie tourist bitching and whinging, tell them they 'sound like a pom at bondi'... that should pull the fucker up short... or possibly start a fist fight. Win-win.)

Other than that, we treat Poms pretty much the same as we treat everyone else.

The weird thing about that is that AFAIK Australia is one of the few countries in the world with no particular historical reason to be pissed off at us.

Actually, Australia has several historical reasons but that's neither here nor there because most Aussies don't give a fuck, only fuckwit ultranationalists... or 4th generation 'Irish' who've just discovered their 'Irish Pride' (who you can ignore or set on fire).

Blimey. I'm English and 34 years old and I've yet to hear anyone talk about "the empire". And "convicts"? I can only assume that any English person who says something like that to an Australian is intentionally trying to wind them up.

Also, thanks for the pro tip, it'll come in handy for sure (there's no shortage of Australians in London telling everyone how much they hate being in England and are only here for the money blah blah blah). One thing though... what's a bondi?

 

[mlooshka]

Blimey. I'm English and 34 years old and I've yet to hear anyone talk about "the empire". And "convicts"? I can only assume that any English person who says something like that to an Australian is intentionally trying to wind them up.

You're clearly drinking in the wrong pubs then o.o I can't count the number of times I've regaled with drunken soliloquies on the subject of empire. Maybe its because I'm an expat. Sometimes its misty-eyed nostalgia and sometimes its simply a history lesson, as if the teller expects me to have left school not understanding that Britain once had quite a bit of land under her sway.

"you can't get proper chips here." Whinging, complaining, negative fuckrags...

Ah... British tourists - making American tourists feel slightly better about their manners the world over.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

Blimey. I'm English and 34 years old and I've yet to hear anyone talk about "the empire". And "convicts"? I can only assume that any English person who says something like that to an Australian is intentionally trying to wind them up.

Some people just become idiotic fucks when taken out of their own culture... that's my theory, anyway.

It's not about saying it a few times in a bit of mutual pisstaking (although it does lack imagination)... I've encountered fuckheads who've gone on and on and on about it until they were 'politely' asked to shut the fuck up and fuck off.

Also, thanks for the pro tip, it'll come in handy for sure (there's no shortage of Australians in London telling everyone how much they hate being in England and are only here for the money blah blah blah). One thing though... what's a bondi?

Bondi Beach, big tourist beach in Sydney.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

"you can't get proper chips here." Whinging, complaining, negative fuckrags...

Ah... British tourists - making American tourists feel slightly better about their manners the world over.

American tourists used to be worse... until we murdered a bunch of them but eventually they seem to have caught on that Aussies really don't give a fuck about... whatever it is they were telling us is much better in the US.

They also learned to stop talking up how 'tough' where they come from is... see, despite an American saying something like "I grew up on the mean streets of Sacramento', what an Aussie hears is "Please put a dangerous animal in my bed and make me scream like a girl, you'll laugh until you shit."

Oh yeah, and the most important lesson any tourist to Australia can learn is "Don't talk shit if you can't take it in return." That almost as big a crime as skipping out on your round.

 

[Epic Fail 1977]

Blimey. I'm English and 34 years old and I've yet to hear anyone talk about "the empire". And "convicts"? I can only assume that any English person who says something like that to an Australian is intentionally trying to wind them up.

You're clearly drinking in the wrong pubs then o.o

Or the right pubs!
Actually TBH I don't really do pubs anymore, ever since they banned smoking...

"you can't get proper chips here." Whinging, complaining, negative fuckrags...

Ah... British tourists - making American tourists feel slightly better about their manners the world over.

These days I find American tourists to be quite pleasant. Maybe they're more self-conscious now than they used to be? British tourists are still twats though. We'll never learn.

 

[mlooshka]

You're clearly drinking in the wrong pubs then o.o

Or the right pubs!

Ok, fair play... Occasionally I learn something interesting - but mostly its just "Hey, remember when we ruled you? Good times, good times..." Then they wander off and forget that we've had any conversation at all

 

[LiquidGrape]

Self-censorship is, IMO, even worse than forced censorship. It's a word, if you want to use it, use it, and anyone who can't stomach it is a ****. And the article author is cunting right, we do say **** a lot over here in cuntland. ****.

What an inspiring stance for individual freedom.
- Screw the sensitivities of others as long as I get to keep my silly werds!

Honestly, it's as if people fight harder for the right to be unpleasant more than anything else.

Really? Frankly, if a swear word can offend you to the point that you need to bring in the word "sensitivities", you're going to spend most of your life in a permanent state of whingey, disapproving indigence, and nobody likes that guy.

I have no real issue with swearing. Expletives are good fun most of the time.
What is problematic with that word is the fact that it is a gendered slur.
That said, I'm not going to censor language. How could I, anyway? I recognise people's right to say whatever they want.
- That doesn't mean I'm not going to call people out on what they choose to say, and whether it is always a good idea to do so.

 

[Hexenwolf]

The "C word," as some people insist on calling it, is widely considered the most severe curse word in the English language. Feminist scholar Germaine Greer once called it "one of the few remaining words in the English language with a genuine power to shock."

Uhhhhhhhh... no?

It might not be used as much, but that's not enough to make it the worst curse in English. Not even close.

 

[The_Fezz]

Still works for me, that is fantastic!

 

[ReservoirAngel]

Honestly? This is just funny. Considering I can barely go a day without one of my friends or me using the word to insult someone in a joking manner, I'm not too fussed.

 

[CardinalPiggles]

Feminist scholar Germaine Greer once called it "one of the few remaining words in the English language with a genuine power to shock."

Actually It's not that shocking where I'm from, in fact I use it quite often, in jest.

 

[Captain Booyah]

I'm English and I loved this. To be fair, most of us are. Somebody told me about this Google ranking a few days ago and I got a screenshot of it while I could. YEEESSSSS. I HAVE A PIECE OF HISTORY ON MY LAPTOP.

Also, Peep Show picture? +1 approval.

 

[Neonit]

hah! that reminds me of the situation we had a couple of years ago back in poland. if you typed in idiot you would get the site of president, if you would type moron you would get prime minister. there were a couple more but that was some time ago, and my memory isnt like it used to be......

i suspect google is trying to tell us something......

 

[Poisoned Al]

Probably some fat, stupid American probably thought they were being really insulting, who ironically will throw a spastic fit over being called fat and stupid.

 

[Dwarfman]

Australians have used that as the standard definition for the English for over a century.

true. i've heard it a lot down there. its pretty much a common phrase like shit. my friend uses it practically every time. of course among friends.

To clarify, in Australia, swear words such as dick, bugger, bloody, shit and fuck, are not swear words, they are mearly useful adverbs and pronouns to an appropriate situation. **** will get you in trouble depending on where you are and who you talk to.

For example when meeting an old friend who may have been a larikan in the past one might open the conversation with the following greeting "Oi ****! hows it goin'"

However being sighted for dissorderly behaviour a policeman might turn the other cheek to a comment like "Listen you bloody idiot, this is fuckin' bullshit!" He will not however turn a blind eye to " Bugger this! Your a fucking ****!" This I guarantee will get you arrested and a reserve booking for the cell with the malfunctioning camera and ther old collection of phone books.

I trust this helps.

 

[theonecookie]

Bah silly google the only way to offend a British man is with a glass bottle that or a dueling pistol social standing permitting, your move google