Greatest Quotes Ever
- Thread starter PurpleRain
- Start date
"Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life." (Terry Pratchett)
"Sometimes you eat the bar, and sometimes, well, he eats you." (The Big Lebowski)
"Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest." (unconfirmed, but often attributed to Denis Diderot)
"Don't say it's fake if you haven't seen what I do" (John Edward)
"I've seen what you do. It's fake." (Me)
"But we are fearfully and wonderfully made, and we glorious Americans will occasionally astonish the God that created us when we get a fair start." (Mark Twain)
"Sometimes you eat the bar, and sometimes, well, he eats you." (The Big Lebowski)
"Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest." (unconfirmed, but often attributed to Denis Diderot)
"Don't say it's fake if you haven't seen what I do" (John Edward)
"I've seen what you do. It's fake." (Me)
"But we are fearfully and wonderfully made, and we glorious Americans will occasionally astonish the God that created us when we get a fair start." (Mark Twain)
"When they make me into an Orangu-man, I hope they don't put me in a tutu. I'd hate that." The Lobe.
"And, isn't sanity really just a one-trick pony anyway? I mean all you get is one trick, rational thinking, but when you're good and crazy, oooh, oooh, oooh, the sky is the limit"
The Tick
"And, isn't sanity really just a one-trick pony anyway? I mean all you get is one trick, rational thinking, but when you're good and crazy, oooh, oooh, oooh, the sky is the limit"
The Tick
For MMO RPG players -
"If your gonna stare at an ass for hundreds of hours... make sure its a girls"
"If your gonna stare at an ass for hundreds of hours... make sure its a girls"
"girlfriends come and go but epics are soulbound" - some WoW player after i started an arguement
"what the fuck is a samophlange?" - blundercats (answer that if you can)
"this is the world we live in and these are the hands we're given" - land of confusion
"carpet bombing from B-52s is very accurate...the bombs are garunteed to hit the ground" - quote in CoD4
"your supposed to hit her! dam right im gonna hit that!! goddamit!" - metal gear awesome 2 (spaces = next character)
"so you like to play castlevania WHOA..wh...what??" - MGA2 again
"i'll let you pass if you can beat me..... in DDR!!!" - naruto abridged
"and now it time for you to come with me...i need you for my power??? ....sure why not?" - same again
"you look like a bondage slave perfect!! girls dig bondage slaves" - yu-gi-oh abridged
"do you know what happens when you blast a giant with a fireball? uh...no what? the same thing that happens to everything else ....dude that line sucked" - 8 bit theater
"a little something i like to call FIGHTERDOKEN!!!" same again
http://www.animationarcade.com/animation/8-bit-theater-2.html
http://video.google.co.uk/videosearch?q=metal+gear+awesome+2&sitesearch=
"what the fuck is a samophlange?" - blundercats (answer that if you can)
"this is the world we live in and these are the hands we're given" - land of confusion
"carpet bombing from B-52s is very accurate...the bombs are garunteed to hit the ground" - quote in CoD4
"your supposed to hit her! dam right im gonna hit that!! goddamit!" - metal gear awesome 2 (spaces = next character)
"so you like to play castlevania WHOA..wh...what??" - MGA2 again
"i'll let you pass if you can beat me..... in DDR!!!" - naruto abridged
"and now it time for you to come with me...i need you for my power??? ....sure why not?" - same again
"you look like a bondage slave perfect!! girls dig bondage slaves" - yu-gi-oh abridged
"do you know what happens when you blast a giant with a fireball? uh...no what? the same thing that happens to everything else ....dude that line sucked" - 8 bit theater
"a little something i like to call FIGHTERDOKEN!!!" same again
http://www.animationarcade.com/animation/8-bit-theater-2.html
http://video.google.co.uk/videosearch?q=metal+gear+awesome+2&sitesearch=
George Bush has the best quotes ever.
"I believe man and fish can co-exist peacefully"
"More and more of our imports are coming from overseas"
(After meeting with the queen of england)"She was neat"
"You teach a child to read and write and he or her will pass a literacy test."
Also:
"What are you doing?"
"Your mum."
My science teacher: "If a tree falls in a forest and no-one is around, does it make a sound?"
My friend: "Yeah. NYEEEEEEEEEE-KSHWAM!"
MST: "Ah, but if no-one is around, how do we know that the falling tree made a sound?"
MF: " Because it's what fucking trees do. Christ, our teachers are thick."
"What's that you're drinking, then?"
"Poof Juice."
"Fine then, I'll just sit over here with my bottle of REAL MAN Juice."
"You're drinking WHAT?!"
My french teacher: "What did you have for your breakfast this morning?"
My friend (same one from above): "Fucking. Smack."
Me: "Y'know, gullible isn't in the dictionary."
My friend: "What? Lemme see that!"
(He leafs through the dictionary for about five minutes)
My friend: "Yeah it is! See? It's right... Oh fuck you."
Me: (Holding forward a clenched fist): "Know what this is?"
My friend: "No."
Me: "Wanker's Cramp! Get it?!"
My friend: "Yeah!"
Me: "Well then you must a wanker. Stop being a wanker, wanker!"
"I believe man and fish can co-exist peacefully"
"More and more of our imports are coming from overseas"
(After meeting with the queen of england)"She was neat"
"You teach a child to read and write and he or her will pass a literacy test."
Also:
"What are you doing?"
"Your mum."
My science teacher: "If a tree falls in a forest and no-one is around, does it make a sound?"
My friend: "Yeah. NYEEEEEEEEEE-KSHWAM!"
MST: "Ah, but if no-one is around, how do we know that the falling tree made a sound?"
MF: " Because it's what fucking trees do. Christ, our teachers are thick."
"What's that you're drinking, then?"
"Poof Juice."
"Fine then, I'll just sit over here with my bottle of REAL MAN Juice."
"You're drinking WHAT?!"
My french teacher: "What did you have for your breakfast this morning?"
My friend (same one from above): "Fucking. Smack."
Me: "Y'know, gullible isn't in the dictionary."
My friend: "What? Lemme see that!"
(He leafs through the dictionary for about five minutes)
My friend: "Yeah it is! See? It's right... Oh fuck you."
Me: (Holding forward a clenched fist): "Know what this is?"
My friend: "No."
Me: "Wanker's Cramp! Get it?!"
My friend: "Yeah!"
Me: "Well then you must a wanker. Stop being a wanker, wanker!"
"We're chained to the world and we all gotta pull." - Tom Waits
"Time abhors a paradox." - Raziel, Soul Reaver 2
"But, they'll see the big board!" - General Buck Turdgison, Doctor Strangelove
"There was a time when they cared nothing for Miss Vance, when their only experience with humanity was a crowbar coming at them down a steel corridor." - The G-Man, Half Life 2: Episode 2
"Madness is the emergency exit." - The Joker, The Killing Joke
""I am messiah"
The grand delusion
To hell-wracked things,
Revelation." - Cryptopsy, Benedictine Convulsions
"Time abhors a paradox." - Raziel, Soul Reaver 2
"But, they'll see the big board!" - General Buck Turdgison, Doctor Strangelove
"There was a time when they cared nothing for Miss Vance, when their only experience with humanity was a crowbar coming at them down a steel corridor." - The G-Man, Half Life 2: Episode 2
"Madness is the emergency exit." - The Joker, The Killing Joke
""I am messiah"
The grand delusion
To hell-wracked things,
Revelation." - Cryptopsy, Benedictine Convulsions
"It's a trap!"
-Admiral Ackbar
"I have a bad feeling about this..."
-Luke, Han, Leia, C-3P0, Obi-Wan, Anakin, Kyle Katarn
"And from that day forward, any time a bunch of animals are together in one place, it's called a ZOO!"
*head falls*
"Unless it's a FARM!"
-Soldier, TF2
"It is the 41st millenium... and there is only war."
-Tom Baker narration, Fire Warrior
"...prancin' aboot with yer head fulla EYEBALLS!"
-Demoman, TF2
"A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject."
-Winston Churchill
"Witness your DOOM!"
-Psyker, DOW series
"Do YOU hear the voices, TOO?!"
-Aspiring Champion, DOW series
"Forces of Chaos...bow to me."
-Chaos Lord (DC version), DOW series
"How fortunate for governments that the people they administer don't think."
-Adolf Hitler
"Oi! Where's me arm?!"
-Mega Armored Nobz, DOW series
"Education is a weapon, whose effect depends on who holds it in his hands and at whom it is aimed."
-Josef Stalin
"You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else."
-Winston Churchill
"Stop yer runnin'! You look like a scared 'humie!"
-Big Mek, DOW series
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither libery nor safety."
-Benjamin Franklin
"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
-Jesus
"Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened."
-Winston Churchill
"We'z all gonna die!"
-Slugga boy, DOW series
"For the Emperor!"
-Space marines, DOW series
"Oh, they're gaenna have ta gloo yoo back together... IN HELL!!!"
-Demoman, TF2
-Admiral Ackbar
"I have a bad feeling about this..."
-Luke, Han, Leia, C-3P0, Obi-Wan, Anakin, Kyle Katarn
"And from that day forward, any time a bunch of animals are together in one place, it's called a ZOO!"
*head falls*
"Unless it's a FARM!"
-Soldier, TF2
"It is the 41st millenium... and there is only war."
-Tom Baker narration, Fire Warrior
"...prancin' aboot with yer head fulla EYEBALLS!"
-Demoman, TF2
"A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject."
-Winston Churchill
"Witness your DOOM!"
-Psyker, DOW series
"Do YOU hear the voices, TOO?!"
-Aspiring Champion, DOW series
"Forces of Chaos...bow to me."
-Chaos Lord (DC version), DOW series
"How fortunate for governments that the people they administer don't think."
-Adolf Hitler
"Oi! Where's me arm?!"
-Mega Armored Nobz, DOW series
"Education is a weapon, whose effect depends on who holds it in his hands and at whom it is aimed."
-Josef Stalin
"You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else."
-Winston Churchill
"Stop yer runnin'! You look like a scared 'humie!"
-Big Mek, DOW series
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither libery nor safety."
-Benjamin Franklin
"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
-Jesus
"Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened."
-Winston Churchill
"We'z all gonna die!"
-Slugga boy, DOW series
"For the Emperor!"
-Space marines, DOW series
"Oh, they're gaenna have ta gloo yoo back together... IN HELL!!!"
-Demoman, TF2
"Hey Astronauts must be popular with the ladies it says hear they get all the tang they want" - Micheal Kelso - That 70's show
"Oi Susie" - Call of Duty 4
"I took out his weapons, both of them" - Sin City
"Who are you Edmond"
"I'm batmannnnnn" - Batman forever, the riddler
"You cock Juggling thunder ****" - Blade 3
"Oi Susie" - Call of Duty 4
"I took out his weapons, both of them" - Sin City
"Who are you Edmond"
"I'm batmannnnnn" - Batman forever, the riddler
"You cock Juggling thunder ****" - Blade 3
these quotes r from red vs blue a web series
Church: You know, I could've taken that alien out if I'd hit him just a few more times.
Tucker: A few more times? How about one time!
Church: Well, I think I landed at least two or three shots.
Tucker: Yeah right.
Tex: You didn't hit anything but the wall.
Church: How the hell would you know? You were running straight backwards
Tex: This is a long-range weapon, okay? I need distance to use it effectively.
Tucker: Where were you planning on shooting him from, the fucking moon? If you'd have backed up any further you'd have had to mail him the bullets!
Tucker: [Tucker is being sent on a dangerous mission] What if I have to kill stuff, dude? I'm a lover, not a fighter.
Church: I know, Tucker, I'm the same way. That's why we get along so well- we're both just a couple of lovers.
Tucker: That sounded kind of gay, dude.
Church: Yeah, it did.
[the Blue Team is talking about its tank]
Church: You know what? I could blow up the whole goddamn world with this thing.
[the Reds and Blues negotiate a unique terms of surrender, in which the Blues will send over the Medic, Frank Dufresne, in exchange for Grif, on behalf of the Reds, declaring how much he sucks]
Sarge: Get on with it, Grif.
Grif: [exasperated sigh] I would just like to let everyone know that I suck.
Church: And?
Grif: [with heavy hesitation] And that I'm a girl.
Church: What else?
Grif: [in a hesitant tone] And I like ribbons in my hair, and I want to kiss all the *boys*.
Sarge: This may be the best surrender of all time.
and
[Tucker and Church of Blue Army are spying on Grif and Simmons of Red Army. Church is using a sniper rifle to watch the Reds]
Tucker: What are they doing?
Church: What?
Tucker: I said, what are they doing now?
Church: God damn, I am getting so sick of answering that question.
Tucker: You have the fucking rifle, I can't see shit. Don't ***** at me, because I'm not going to just sit up here and play with my dick all day.
Church: OK, OK, look. They're just standing there and talking. OK? That's all they're doing. That's all they EVER do, is just stand there and talk. That's what they were doing last week, that's what they were doing when you asked me five minutes ago. So five minutes from NOW, when you ask me, "What are they doing?", my answer's gonna be, "They're still just talking, and they're still just standing there."
Tucker: [after a long pause] What are they talking about?
Church: You know what? I fucking hate you.
Church: You know, I could've taken that alien out if I'd hit him just a few more times.
Tucker: A few more times? How about one time!
Church: Well, I think I landed at least two or three shots.
Tucker: Yeah right.
Tex: You didn't hit anything but the wall.
Church: How the hell would you know? You were running straight backwards
Tex: This is a long-range weapon, okay? I need distance to use it effectively.
Tucker: Where were you planning on shooting him from, the fucking moon? If you'd have backed up any further you'd have had to mail him the bullets!
Tucker: [Tucker is being sent on a dangerous mission] What if I have to kill stuff, dude? I'm a lover, not a fighter.
Church: I know, Tucker, I'm the same way. That's why we get along so well- we're both just a couple of lovers.
Tucker: That sounded kind of gay, dude.
Church: Yeah, it did.
[the Blue Team is talking about its tank]
Church: You know what? I could blow up the whole goddamn world with this thing.
[the Reds and Blues negotiate a unique terms of surrender, in which the Blues will send over the Medic, Frank Dufresne, in exchange for Grif, on behalf of the Reds, declaring how much he sucks]
Sarge: Get on with it, Grif.
Grif: [exasperated sigh] I would just like to let everyone know that I suck.
Church: And?
Grif: [with heavy hesitation] And that I'm a girl.
Church: What else?
Grif: [in a hesitant tone] And I like ribbons in my hair, and I want to kiss all the *boys*.
Sarge: This may be the best surrender of all time.
and
[Tucker and Church of Blue Army are spying on Grif and Simmons of Red Army. Church is using a sniper rifle to watch the Reds]
Tucker: What are they doing?
Church: What?
Tucker: I said, what are they doing now?
Church: God damn, I am getting so sick of answering that question.
Tucker: You have the fucking rifle, I can't see shit. Don't ***** at me, because I'm not going to just sit up here and play with my dick all day.
Church: OK, OK, look. They're just standing there and talking. OK? That's all they're doing. That's all they EVER do, is just stand there and talk. That's what they were doing last week, that's what they were doing when you asked me five minutes ago. So five minutes from NOW, when you ask me, "What are they doing?", my answer's gonna be, "They're still just talking, and they're still just standing there."
Tucker: [after a long pause] What are they talking about?
Church: You know what? I fucking hate you.