Halo: Reach ZP predictions thread.

Guitarmasterx7

Day Pig
Mar 16, 2009
3,872
0
0
Iunno, I'll take a shot.

I'm guessing he'll say something about the first guy's death being this big corny melodramatic sad moment and then all the other members getting haphazardly murdered in the last 3 levels of the game.
 

Vrex360

Badass Alien
Mar 2, 2009
8,379
0
0
I'm actually kind of concerned because what with the hyper detailed assault rifles, ruined cityscape landscapes, entire teams of heavy armored allies and the fact that the aliens are now single minded inhuman genocidal monsters, one looking for why Halo is just a 'macho space marine shooter' wouldn't have to look too far.
Let it be clear, I think that all that worked really well in this game, but I suspect any obvious criticism searching will mention it.

In any case, worse case scenario is that the majority of the Halo community hate it and get riled up in the comment page and then all the Halo haters use this review as their flagship of 'proof' as to why Halo: Reach is bad and after listening to every word of Yahtzee and eating it all up they'll then go back to calling the Halo fans 'sheep'.

But then again, the Halo 3 review didn't divide up and destroy the peaceful truce of the Halo community, although it did spawn a hell of a lot of Halo Hate Threads but I think as it stands we've all done a lot of growing these last few years so I'm hopeful that there won't be some massive fanbo/hater flameout that explodes all over the community.

Besides almost every other fan or just regular review has made a fair and honest review on the subject matter so I can handle one review where the guy is ripping it up for the sake of laughs.
 

ReinofFire

New member
Jun 30, 2009
103
0
0
He'll probably bash on the whole helmet thing.

But one thing is bothering me, how come everyone keeps on saying "oh, because their faces where covered by helmets you had no idea who was talking and you don't know if Noble 6 was mute or if he actually talked". I don't know about you, but the first time I played the game (Not the second or third but the FIRST!) I knew who was talking and I was surprised when they gave Noble 6 (depending on your gender) a voice. Now for those of you who are wondering, Noble 6 sounds like a young caucasian male. At first I thought, hmm maybe you couldn't tell the difference if he was black or white or hispanic or asian, but then as the game progressed it was quite obvious that he was white.

This is not to bash on the people, this is to bash on the idea that it is impossible to hear it. It's not, and not only is it not impossible, it's really easy.

Sorry for the triple negative.
 

Grey_Focks

New member
Jan 12, 2010
1,969
0
0
BloodSquirrel said:
I predict he'll rail against it, but will be hard up for actual reasons for not liking it and result to blowing a few tiny nitpicks completely out of proportion.
So just like his Mass Effect 2 video? (aka, "I hate probing planets!")

OT: I dunno...I just know that the comment section for that video will have more flame than....well than something with lots of flame (tempted to make a holocaust joke, but I thought better of it)

He probably will go on about it being too based on multiplayer, every game should have a single player that can stand by itself, blah-blah, he'll say it's more of the same, and he'll probably use the word "Average" somewhere in the ballpark of 20 times. Atleast.

Honestly the man is a terribly reviewer/critic/whatever, but his videos continue to make me laugh. I'm kinda looking forward to this.
 

Space Spoons

New member
Aug 21, 2008
3,335
0
0
He's going to love it, and will proceed to put it up on the same pedestal that Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time rests upon. He'll have nothing bad to say about the game. Not one word. This, combined with the fact that it's a Halo title, will cause a perfect storm of rage that will engulf the Escapist forums. The backlash against MovieBob for his review of The Expendables will pale in comparison. Every thread will involve the words "Yahtzee", "Reach", "ZP Review" or "Sellout". Accusations will fly of Mr. Croshaw being on Bungie's payroll. Die-hard Halo fans will fight tooth-and-nail with gamers who can't stand the series. Zero Punctuation fanatics will declare that the series has jumped the shark, that Yahtzee has lost his edge, that the Escapist at large has sold out. There will be chaos unlike anything we've ever seen.

...

What? I like to play the long odds.
 

BloodSquirrel

New member
Jun 23, 2008
1,263
0
0
ReinofFire said:
He'll probably bash on the whole helmet thing.

But one thing is bothering me, how come everyone keeps on saying "oh, because their faces where covered by helmets you had no idea who was talking and you don't know if Noble 6 was mute or if he actually talked". I don't know about you, but the first time I played the game (Not the second or third but the FIRST!) I knew who was talking and I was surprised when they gave Noble 6 (depending on your gender) a voice. Now for those of you who are wondering, Noble 6 sounds like a young caucasian male. At first I thought, hmm maybe you couldn't tell the difference if he was black or white or hispanic or asian, but then as the game progressed it was quite obvious that he was white.

This is not to bash on the people, this is to bash on the idea that it is impossible to hear it. It's not, and not only is it not impossible, it's really easy.

Sorry for the triple negative.
Considering the fact that there is at least one time when Noble Six is the only person who could have possibly been talking, I just chalk it up to being a 3rd-hand complaint from people who either didn't play the game or weren't paying attention.
 

Lukeman1884

New member
Sep 21, 2010
103
0
0
He'll bash the campaign and ignore the multiplayer, as he does for every single FPS. Also armor abilities. And I've got $10 on him comparing Reach to another FPS and calling it a clone. And you can't forget about his hate for aliens.
 

tirone231

New member
Jul 11, 2009
95
0
0
Dislike of space marines, characters have little to no development so there's no emotional attachment when they die, Kat is kind of a *****, Carter's voice is one of the most phoned in performances ever (delivered with no emotion...nothing to indicate why he should be a leader), too multiplayer focused (and we all know how he dislikes Xbox Live), Space combat is nice change but terribly underdeveloped, difficulty curve from heroic to legendary is ridiculously lop-sided, ultimately is too much like every other halo game, except that it now has jetpacks...(insert Dark Void reference)...

that ought to cover several of them. I like the multiplayer madness of the game, but feel that the campaign was largely a waste of time. I still believe that Halo 2 had the best campaign.
 

crimsonshrouds

New member
Mar 23, 2009
1,477
0
0
I don't like halo, so im really looking forward to this review.

no predictions but if he gives it a thumbs up i may give the halo series a second shot with me.

I once tried halo odst and after 30 mins i found the game boring and not very different from other generic FPSs.
 

Donojosh

New member
Aug 24, 2010
20
0
0
tirone231 said:
I still believe that Halo 2 had the best campaign.
Personally, best one of the seris has to be the orginal Halo. Just didn't like the dual wield mechanic
 

SelectivelyEvil13

New member
Jul 28, 2010
956
0
0
Just some of my guesses:

#1: Schizophrenic and criminally short - One minute you're fighting on the ground, the next you're sneaking about with a sniper rifle in the shadows, the next you're in space, then you're on the ground again, then you're flying about in a helicopter, you're on the ground again, you save the day but not really, then you get called ethnic slurs by twelve year-olds. All of that in the span of 7 hours.

My view: Generally I enjoyed the varied gameplay as it kept the game moving without feeling too repetitive. However, I do have to say that Reach felt very short considering how much you would think would be going on. Certain points like the space mission transitioned so quickly without explaining the gaps too well. To me, the Helicopter mission in particular dragged on while not really contributing to a sense of "time" or progress during the events of Reach. I don't really like vehicle sections, either, and would have liked to have seen more fights like defending Dr. Hasley's lab.

#2: Unlikable/Throw-Away Characters and Plot - I know that I am supposed to have some emotional response other than "Boom! Headshot!", but remind me again why I'm supposed to be drowning in remorse over some trite space marine's bathetic demise?

My view: Compared to the Halo trilogy games, I much preferred Reach's characters and plot. Everything tied in well with the setting, and there was an overarching consistency. My only complaint for plot would tie in more with its lack of length and involvement with the characters.

#3: Gimmicks - An ode to Star Wars randomly jostled into the fray to add another bullet point to the back of the box, while never rearing its head in any other application for the game every again. Jetpacks are impractical contrivances shoehorned in to appease the simple-minded. The jetpack's thrust is as impotent as the collective efforts in a nursery home, propelling you feeble distances that are mitigated only by the fact that you cannot otherwise jump across forced sections in the game. Strategically, it is otherwise a fine way to perch yourself within firing distance of every enemy within 200 yards as there is no cover on the top of a mountain of crates.

My view: I did like the space combat, but would have liked to have seen it used more or even introduced in its own game mode like firefight. The jetpack, well, for single player, yeah... it was not very useful.

#4: While too afraid to abandon the "mend your bleeding ass by hiding behind a rock" health system, Reach also features a nominal health bar system that also regenerates anyway, relegating health packs to the usefulness of jetpacks attached to the undercarriage of a tank.

My view: Going back to the Halo trilogy, Reach and CE are the best in my opinion, as the health bar adds to the experience and gameplay. I still don't understand why the health bar would also sometimes recharge, though.
 

tirone231

New member
Jul 11, 2009
95
0
0
Donojosh said:
tirone231 said:
I still believe that Halo 2 had the best campaign.
Personally, best one of the seris has to be the orginal Halo. Just didn't like the dual wield mechanic
sorry, i meant in terms of the story. I'm not a big fan of the dual wielding either
 

smeghead25

New member
Apr 28, 2009
421
0
0
I predict that he will like the jetpacks but call it the only real fun thing in the game. And then say something along the lines of "but at least it's better than Dark Void."

He will say it's better than the rest though, and make some joke about that not being much.
 

MONSTERheart

New member
Aug 17, 2009
457
0
0
The text gets in the way of the crosshair during multiplayer. For fucks sake, I was having a hard time in SWAT because the damn text covered up my reticle half the time.

Shallow, dull characters. Not enough time to get attached to any of them. Not as if we would have anyways. Kat is a crazy *****, Carter is average joe, Emile is vaguely racist stereotype, Jun is boring and Jorge, the only mildly likable one, doesn't stick around long enough for anyone to remember.

Regenerating Health

Short Campaign with no coherent structure.
 

clockout

New member
Jun 7, 2010
198
0
0
He will mention how he was in awestuck at the pure brilliance of the game, and say "If Reach had a penis I would be sucking on it like a staved baby calf sucking its mothers udders till they bleed, then keep going until the cow is tapped out of all bodily fluids" totally! then go on about the gentleman like manners of one talking to the queen that is found on its onlie community.

Or he could not do because we have already predicted what he would say about, so not much point to him doing it now is there? I could be wrong tho.