High School Relationships

[Neesa]

Not all high school relationships are a joke. Most are. Not all. My parents have been together since their senior year in high school (1979-until now). It'll be 24 years since they've been married and they still love each other. It's a matter of how serious the relationships are.

Now, as for me. I had a few "serious" relationships that lasted over a year. The first one ended cause I found out the guy was cheating on me with about 13 other girls (one being my cousin) and the 2nd one realized he wasn't ready for a "serious" commitment after a year. For the lulz.

For my current relationship? I'm been dating my best friend from high school. Mmm, 7 years of friendship is a pretttttttty good foundation to build our relationship off of. We tried to date a few times in high school, but the relationship was too brother/sister like. After we cut off ties in college (due to his psycho ex for hating me with a passion), we started talking again. Started out as friends again and rekindled old feelings and bam. Wonderful relationship, ahoy. I'm in one of the best relationships ever and neither of us plan on ending it.

As for the whole "Jane" thing. If you're not interested, let her know now. No sense leading her on. Let her know that she has "a snowball's chance in Hell" with you. Cut that shit to the core. Now.

*edit:

High School Relationships, what a joke.

So many people I've seen have said "Oh, I love you forever and ever" and break up two weeks later.

Yeah, I broke up with an ex in high school cause made me a "gift wrapped box of love" after 2 weeks. Yeah, nothing was in it, but it was attached with a sappy poem. At the age of 16, doing anything remotely sappy like that to me was laughable. I gladly showed it to my boyfriend (who was my best friend at the time) and we laughed about it the whole afternoon. I either gave it back to him or threw that shit out. Then again, he also had me as "The ****" in his cell due to how much of a "cold-hearted *****" I was. Eh, comes with the territory.

 

[The Cheezy One]

how i know most of my years secrets, and i can control them too!
this one guy (well call him bob) has a crush on a girl (well call her sally) bob thinks hes in love, but its just a crush, cos he doesnt talk to sally enough to like her for her personality. this guy does stupid things like giving her a death card and a teddy when she broke her wrist, and giving her £50 for valentines day, as well as a cuddly tiger. his excuse "thats wat i do for my mates"
we laugh at him a lot for this saying "theres a kind of person that will go out with you for money", and he got annoyed and said "ill move to america. you wont be laughing then will you?"
"do you have a visa?"
[pause]
"ive got a debit card"
also i talk to this girl a lot just to annoy the many people that fancy her

 

[PrinnyGod]

I don't know, I've come to the conclusion that I'm far from normal, this overly testosterone thing, not me. Actual caring about most things I do, or that happens to me, very low so long as it's not physically harmful....

With this general spaced out oblivious way of life i can say thus, Relationships are a rare thing for me, and I'd say my current one is rather well off and started end of the senior year of high school last year in theory. How ever i wouldn't claim that high school relationships are hollow, unserious and pointless. How else will you learn some things? and some people are fully developed mentally at that age, making some rather immature, and other's mature in general, give you half a guess on what the majority is...

Anyway, my advice on such things is the passive route, however you seem to like controlling things, so that doesn't apply does it?

 

[StarStruckStrumpets]

Haha, I know what you mean, my friend will end up being suicidal if his relationship breaks down. I've not had a relationship in high school as yet, but if I do and it messes up, I'll get a little sad at most. Breaking up is human, it's very rare that you find someone you can be with FOREVER.

 

[Shapsters]

Not really planning on having a high school relantionship, I ain't puttin out, if I ain't gettin none in return

 

[BubbleGumSnareDrum]

I take offense to that.
I'm in high school and my relationship has just broken the one year mark. It's going strong. But then, we do things like stay over at each other's house, lend each other money, play games with each other etc.
I think the fact that's she's nineteen has helped, as it brings a maturity level to the relationship that keeps things balanced.

Then that isn't a high school relationship. "High school relationship" infers that both partners are still in high school.

 

[BubbleGumSnareDrum]

Nice summation of the situation that most HS kids have. They either fail, usually do to something stupid, "I can't believe you went to a lan party and didn't talk to me for 3 hours" Or they like you said "devolve into codependency"(love that phrase) With the whole " I need you" complex that people develop.

Well, there's "needing" someone in the sense of having them around because they understand you and help you deal with problems. That's a real relationship.

If you're clinging to each other because you're too weak to function as a singular being, even the relationship has clearly demonstrated signs of failure/incompatibility, that's codependency. I'm sick of seeing it. I don't know whether to feel bad or just laugh.

 

[Svizzara]

I believe that they are pointless, as they bring only short-term happiness. Even if it does last all the way to graduation, it will most likely begin to fall apart, because one partner may choose to pursue higher education while the other does not. Even if both do, they may choose different colleges/universities.

 

[BallPtPenTheif]

And now I also have to note, when it comes to guys, don't you think we've got too much Testosterone in our bodies? I find it to be really annoying, because although I spend every class watching my classmate's about their personality and reactions, I find my mind to stray, VERY FAR off my original beliefs. er... yeah, guys can understand. And also, I think Jane likes ME now, and I don't know what to make of it.. any tips?

Yeah, stick it in her face!!! YARHHHH!!!

Er.. no.. there's that darn testosterone thing again. Just ask her out on a date and grab a soda and a movie.. and her ass!!! SNARLLLYRAHHGHHHHUGHHH!!!

Fucking testosterone.

 

[garfoldsomeoneelse]

Eh, my highschool sweetheart was killed mid-relationship.

I have no way of knowing that it would've been a permanent relationship (sure felt like it at the time), but now I'm just avoiding any kind of meaningful relationship altogether. Even quick hook-ups at the movie theatre (and what have you) are painful.

Also, it makes me feel like the world's biggest fuckface to say that I'm not certain that we'd still be together if she was alive, since she put her heart and soul into me 'til the end. I don't want to be that "shit happens" guy... not this time.

 

[KaiRai]

Let me tell you a story.
I've just broke up with a girl I was dating for 4 months because I don't have time to fit in college work, sporting activities etc and screw her daily to keep us both happy.

Her friend sent me hate mail, the funniest hate mail I have ever read, and it was in the form of a 3 page word documented LETTER.
It was absolutely hilarious.

 

[Lord_Ascendant]

I read people better than they can read themselves, so I know whats going on. Its in the eyes. Anyways, i digress.

How many "relationship" threads are there exactly? How is the Escapist "knowing" on this topic exactly? I guess we are just the smart section of the internet.

High School relationships are just a giant game of switch-up. They just trade girls every other week, I tried following it for a month and gave up (I'm bored, live with it) Its how one senior chick got preggo, from having 3 boyfriends in the space of about (counts on fingers) 3 weeks? Yeah that's it I think. Anyways the point I'm trying to get to is that YOU SHOULD NOT GET TOO INVOLVED IN HIGH SCHOOL. Getting all tangled in some.....i don't know how to describe it....clusterf*ck that are High School relationships. Sure its fine but don't get it into head that they are "the one" becuase chances are, they aren't.

*takes breath*

To quote a certain xkcd comic "I understand now. There's no choir of angels when you meet the right person. It's about growing out of your fears to realize what you have is what you want."

Think on that next time you get it into your head that some girl is "the one for you". The world wont tell you when its right, its something you judge for yourself. But don't go thinking that about everyone and getting torn to tiny shreds. I learned that lesson the hard way. (long story, ask me on IRC some time)


Codependency is what HS relationships are, as you stated. Scary, yet true.

 

[Bulletinmybrain]

High school relationships are frivolous, meaningless, and doomed to angsty failure within months at most. They also make normal people do completely idiotic things, like John here.

So yeah, I'd say avoid them at all costs.

Yeah but they will have to fuck-up somewhere right? Atleast let it be in a semi-safe if slowly turns you insane, place.

EDIT: And it leaves them in emotional wrecks which I get to laugh about.

 

[ZeroMachine]

I'd say the bigger mistake is dating a high school kid when you're in college. It makes you go back to the way you were back then. It happened to me last year (though luckily, during the breakup I very quickly came to my senses) and it's happening to one of my best friends. It has be worried about her... high schoolers (with few, though existent, exceptions) never stay together like they think they will.

I only personally know one high school couple that could potentially work out.

 

[iJosh]

Highschool dating. I missed out on that. I actually met my girlfriend the day I graduated. lawl.

Well, Made it official after prom.

 

[L33tsauce_Marty]

They do it just so they can get some.. Very little are started because the two are more socially than two friends. Others can be started on social dependence. Meh, I could care less about them. Teen years feed off drama more than WoW guilds.

 

[Pyre00]

Look, ANOTHER one of these threads.