How do you react to being hit on/checked out?

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Eddie the head

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Feb 22, 2012
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It's happened before a few times. I just I don't know, I just don't say anything back. Most of the time I would rather just be left alone. I'm one of those forever alone types that's not to upset about it.
 

TehCookie

Elite Member
Sep 16, 2008
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Mossberg Shotty said:
TehCookie said:
Depends on who it is, if it's a creeper I get creeped out. Otherwise I'm usually equal parts flattered and embarrassed.
Out of curiosity, what constitutes a 'creeper'? If its one of those blanket terms to encompass all people who you aren't interested in, then probably everyone has been crept on.
It's people who trigger my danger sense, that I should avoid otherwise something bad will happen. So someone who has been staring/following me, traditional heavy creeper breathing, unable to say anything and stands there awkwardly stammering. Though I do throw unhygienic people in there too.
 

Rellik San

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Feb 3, 2011
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TehCookie said:
Mossberg Shotty said:
TehCookie said:
Depends on who it is, if it's a creeper I get creeped out. Otherwise I'm usually equal parts flattered and embarrassed.
Out of curiosity, what constitutes a 'creeper'? If its one of those blanket terms to encompass all people who you aren't interested in, then probably everyone has been crept on.
traditional heavy creeper breathing, unable to say anything and stands there awkwardly stammering.
So basically any shy asthmatics?

Azure23 said:
Oddly enough as soon as I got into a long term relationship it seemed like the number of girls interested in me increased, which I think is kinda strange, any girls want to respond to that? Is that normal?
It's more to do with you're unconscious signals, typically when single (and looking) your body language is completely different, you tend to come across as being more tense and not necessarily a good prospect. But when not looking (i.e. if you're in a relationship), you're more relaxed and those subtle changes make you seem more approachable, you're less tense and look more like someone who's out for a good time. It's actually an observable hypothesis, next time you're out with friends and one of them is "on the pull" look at his body language and you'll begin to notice several changes to how he would be if he wasn't looking for someone.

It's also why in a nightclub the bar is the best place to chat to someone, no one is there to chat up a person, but to get drinks instead, you'll find conversation flows much more naturally at the bar, but I guarantee 9 outta 10 times, when you leave the bar you'll have awkward, stilted conversations with that person and that's because the interaction has intrinsically changed in nature. It's actually quite interesting to observe and notice yourself doing it.
 

Paragon Fury

The Loud Shadow
Jan 23, 2009
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I don't really have an opinion on it because I have no idea if its ever happened to me at all. I'm completely oblivious to this sort of thing; I probably couldn't tell unless someone told me.

Which makes it really awkward, because many women seem to think this is enough of a hint or impression:


when someone like me really needs a hint on this level:

 

Phrostbit3n

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Jul 6, 2013
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I've had quite lengthy conversations with someone, then walked away and thought "Holy shit, were we flirting?"
 

Berithil

Maintenence Man of the Universe
Mar 19, 2009
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Simple Bluff said:
FunnyBunny said:
Simple Bluff said:
...and that's pretty much the worst thing you can be when trying to impress the ladies. They hate shorties.
Um, objection? Your ladies shouldn't be called ladies then. ;)
Well. Coming from a (I daresay) lady herself, I should take your word over my own preconceptions, no? Being the fool with so much to learn that I am.

But seriously, you're exactly right of course. And thanks.
Yeaahhhh... I'm 20 years old and 5'7". Let's just say I don't have a problem drawing the attention of the opposite sex (and since that sounded fairly egotistical, I'm going to add that most of the time it's unintentional and, many times, unwanted... ok, I can't not make that sentence sound self-absorbed. Sorry)

Just know that being short shouldn't affect your chances with the right kind of person.
 

Miyenne

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May 16, 2013
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Mossberg Shotty said:
Are you sure you didn't misinterpret things? If you didn't, he's probably just a douche, but its hard to picture someone reacting to what is essentially a compliment with disgust. Maybe he's like 90% of the Escapist community and doesn't react well to being checked out? Also you shouldn't be so down on yourself, lots of guys like chubby girls. I dated one a couple months back and it was lovely.

Coulda been. I didn't take it to heart really, it was just one of those things that struck me in the moment.
I was a bit offended, but if I got rather upset over people giving me disgusted looks for having a tummy pooch or jiggly arms I would never have made it to 30.

Most of all, it struck me as a good question to ask on the forums. And some of the responses here are golden.
 

TehCookie

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Sep 16, 2008
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Rellik San said:
TehCookie said:
Mossberg Shotty said:
TehCookie said:
Depends on who it is, if it's a creeper I get creeped out. Otherwise I'm usually equal parts flattered and embarrassed.
Out of curiosity, what constitutes a 'creeper'? If its one of those blanket terms to encompass all people who you aren't interested in, then probably everyone has been crept on.
traditional heavy creeper breathing, unable to say anything and stands there awkwardly stammering.
So basically any shy asthmatics?
You can't tell the difference between a medical illness and creepy breathing? One makes you cold sweat, the other doesn't.
Since you've obviously never dealt with creepy people, take drunks. You have some that are good fun to be around, and others that make you stay away because you see signs in the body language they're not in a good state of mind.
 

Sacman

Don't Bend! Ascend!
May 15, 2008
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Well, it's not something that happens to me, or has ever happened to me, so I really don't have to worry about it... Though if it did it'd just make me suspicious... because the only time I can see it happening is if said person wants something from me...<.<
 

DarkSeraphim02

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Feb 28, 2011
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I don't get hit on, ever. Mainly because I haven't left my house in over half a decade, and even if I could I probably wouldn't recognize it because I don't have much, ok any, experience when it comes to things like flirting. So odds are, unless said woman is being about as subtle as a hydrogen bomb I'm going to come off as either uninterested, or completely oblivious.

And if I did catch on, gold star for me, I probably wouldn't react to well since I have subterranean self-esteem. I'd be nice about it, but I'd wonder why she's hitting on me of all people.
 

J-meMalone

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Jan 11, 2009
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Yeah, I've never really been hit on. My social group are mainly either in relationships or don't overtly flirt.

As for being checked out, it depends how you define it. If you mean a girl looking at me and smiling, it happens rarely and I smile back. If you mean anything more overt, it's never happened.
 

Bat Vader

Elite Member
Mar 11, 2009
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If someone was just checking me out I most likely would not notice and just continue with what I am doing.

A few years when I was going to NCMC(North Central Michigan College)a female classmate of mine told me she liked me. I felt that she was lying and had some ulterior motive that involved me getting made fun of or me accepting her feelings and then her laughing at me and saying she would never go out with a loser like me. I turned her down and said I was more interested in my grades than dating.

I was really nervous during the whole thing though so I am assuming that the next time I get hit on that I am going to just be as equally nervous and try and find a way out.
 

Genericjim101

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Jan 7, 2011
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"Thank you, I think?". If someone is overly flirty I will mention I have a partner. But if you want to be really shitty and do have a partner you can say "My partner's right, I am attractive!".

There's little harm in taking the compliment graciously in either situation but the issue is if someone over steps boundaries after being told about a partner or touching. Being in the Autistic Spectrum I can't tell if a person's being genuine most of the time so I just roll with it, as for touching I'd look at my shoulder or etc as if there was a giant spider on there.
 

themilo504

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May 9, 2010
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I?m asexual(I think, the only girl around my age I know is my sister so it?s hard to tell) so if somebody was checking me out I would probably give him\her a don?t even bother face.

As for if somebody was hitting on me for starters I?m 16 so if it?s a adult I would call the police or tell them that I?m 16.

If its somebody from around my age I would probably just tell them that I?m asexual so don?t even bother.
 

xshadowscreamx

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Dec 21, 2011
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if or when some girl had checked me out or hit on me,
i wake up and it was all a dream.


all jokes/half truths a aside, its really hard to tell if serious or mocking me, no girl has hit on me.
but checked me out, yeah a few time's. i act like i did not notice. and see what happens. i heard compliment bout my hair atleast once from a high school girl. as i was walking passed to enter the library. i acted like i did not hear it.. was not sure what to do. should i have walked over and said hi. she sounded alteast half sarcastic. so that memory sticks to my mind.. ( jeez im only a few years older then her im not a pedo ha)
 

AnthrSolidSnake

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Jun 2, 2011
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The idea of someone hitting on me doesn't seem to register in my mind very well. In high school, the girls that liked me were generally too shy to talk to me, and other girls in school apparantly found the idea of dating me repulsive (given by the amount of "eww, no way"s, even by friends...couldn't they just say "No"?). Funny enough, it was always gay guys that would hit on me in public, and given that I'm not sexually insecure with my self, I just accept it as a compliment, so long as they don't plan on forcing it on me if I do not want it.

But how would I respond if a girl actually hit on me or checked me out? Hmm...idk, I'd probably fuck it up somehow. Like try to act cooler than is possible for me and accidentally slap a kid in the face or knock over seven rows of grocery isles. Honestly, in most ways, I'd rather stick to the shy whispers that girls give me now ._. It's a bit easier for me to deal with
 

Phasmal

Sailor Jupiter Woman
Jun 10, 2011
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Most of the time I don't even notice until a long time afterwards.
I have a lot of male friends, so males being friendly with me is just normal. I can't really tell when they're trying to be flirty.
So if someone was flirting with me I would probably just be nice back because I'm kind of oblivious.
 

Tyelcapilu

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Mar 19, 2011
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If it's a close friend, I might flirt back, but if it's a stranger I just go on my way and maybe smile depending on how they hit on me.
 

DANEgerous

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Jan 4, 2012
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With massively polarized results. Yeah I will go with that. they directly correlate with if I like you yet while can never develop into a long term relationship because I do not want one if you do want me and I dislike you I now hate you. Now that sounds very negative as there is a massive down side but only a minor up side but I do like on a first date at the absolute latest say this is not long term i do not want such a relationship and yes this likely deep personal conversation is a MUST KNOW before sleep with you. Still If i do like you and you ask to be my boy/girl freind with the knowledge I will not be you husband, yeah that is awesome. If you do it in passing (meaning with no intent for any kind of relationship) or in jest the same totally flattering but know I put people in the like /dislike group rather fast so respect my limits or just be hated by me.
 

vaticanvice

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Feb 21, 2011
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I am a mare.

You see, when a human lady gets propositioned, and isn't interested, she might get embarrassed, might laugh it off, might let the guy down easy. When a mare gets propositioned, and isn't interested, she shoots the stallion/gelding down and then PUMMELS HIM TO DRIVE HOME THE POINT. A mare never forgets an untoward advance, and loathes the male in question for the rest of her natural life.

Do I like having this reaction? No, not at all, it's ruined a couple of friendships for me. It's not rational or even really okay, but it's how I end up feeling almost invariably.

That said, this really only applies to guys (or ladies) crossing a line from "checking me out" to "making it clear that they want to have sex in a way I find mildly impolite." I don't mind being checked out at all! It doesn't happen that often, I'm not to everyone's taste, but it's pretty much just a compliment as far as I'm concerned.