I think my boyfriend is developing a WoW addiction?

[PurplePanther]

Looked everywhere for a gaming addiction forum and they don't seem to exist, so you guys are my last hope
My boyfriend's had a gaming addiction in the past, his family have told me he used to spend around 18hrs a day gaming, I tolerate him playing games for a couple of hours a day otherwise he literally gets withdrawal symptoms.
When he bought WoW I was worried because I'd heard about it being extremely addictive and it turns out I was right to be worried I would say he spends 4-5, a day, sometimes more, playing WoW and when he's not playing it he just goes on about how much he wants to play.
I know 4-5 hours isn't anything too serious yet but he does have a past history of game addiction, so am I over reacting or not? If not what do I do?
Any response greatly appreciated

 

[Burwood123]

If he holds his game more preciously than you, then dump his ass, no need for you to stay because you feel obliged. Sure you love him, but when he's up at 1 am still raiding and you're left alone and cant disturb him while he's playing, are you going to stay loyal? Give him the choice, if he picks you great if not, you didnt need him anyways

 

[OakTaooper]

Set some limits for him. If he can't follow them, then make him make the choice. The game, or you. If it's the game, I'm sorry.

 

[sms_117b]

wow has a parental system (although it might turn off after a certain age), you can limit how much he plays if you can get into his battle.net account....if you want to take that route.

If he has a history, you should be concerned, you'll be better off talking to him about it, and your concerns about it, and what happens if he becomes addicted and wont stop playing it. Addiction to games and WOW's reputation are the two reason I don't play it.

 

[Hiphophippo]

People can mentally become addicted to anything. If he's finding virtual rewards satisfy his lack of real life rewards then he could use a little help.

If you have your boobs out and he says wait a minute let me finish this quest, then you have a problem.

Or, conversely, there's this. It's crude, but red blooded males are red blooded males.

 

[Thebiggestpanda]

Do you want a dude who likes WOW more than you? I'd suggest lookin arround for something better.

 

[Sir_Tor]

If you have your boobs out and he says "wait a minute let me finish this quest" then you have a problem.

Nice...

It doesn't hurt to try does it? Make sure to do it while he's doing an instance or raiding though

 

[Pokeylope]

you could start playing WoW with him, it'd give you more time to spend together, and if it gets out of hand you'll have a deeper understanding of what's going on.

 

[Cowabungaa]

First of all, WoW's and games in general aren't addictive substances, so don't think that taking it away is going to fix his problem. As you said he had this before, so if WoW is gone something else will take it's place.

With gaming, and similar, addictions the problem lies deeper. He wants to escape, finds life apparently not very rewarding so he turns to gaming, something that gives a feeling of satisfaction and accomplishment rather easily. Something he, in his eyes, can feel good and proud about, something that he apparently doesn't get in real life.

So if you want to fix your lad, you have to find out the deeper lying reasons and causes (which are different for every person) for this behaviour and correct them so that he no longer wants to sink all his time into something virtual.

Talk to him about it in all earnestness, express your concerns, and this is very important, get him professional help if the issues are bad enough. You won't find a lot of psychiatrists on the internet, and I'd advice you take him to one if you see he's in a bad enough shape.

Addiction to games and WOW's reputation are the two reason I don't play it.

It's just a very easy game for people who wish to escape to do so thanks to it's reward mechanism. If you're mentally healthy and stable there's nothing to be afraid of. I played it myself for quite some time just like any other game and plenty of folks do the same.

 

[ActivatorX]

Looked everywhere for a gaming addiction forum and they don't seem to exist, so you guys are my last hope
My boyfriend's had a gaming addiction in the past, his family have told me he used to spend around 18hrs a day gaming, I tolerate him playing games for a couple of hours a day otherwise he literally gets withdrawal symptoms.
When he bought WoW I was worried because I'd heard about it being extremely addictive and it turns out I was right to be worried I would say he spends 4-5, a day, sometimes more, playing WoW and when he's not playing it he just goes on about how much he wants to play.
I know 4-5 hours isn't anything too serious yet but he does have a past history of game addiction, so am I over reacting or not? If not what do I do?
Any response greatly appreciated

Ignore all the "dump his ass" posts. First of all, you should talk to him to clear things up.
Obviously, you care about him, so don't do something irrational like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRWxkIGTwzQ
Watch the guy's reaction towards the end.

 

[lolcarver]

keep an eye on how long he plays for, if at any point things go from the sublime to the ridiculous and he does start spending like 12-18 hours on it then scratch his disks in the night and when he gets all angry 'cos they're not working, just offer your attention; if he takes it you can make progress, if not then he is not for you.

Use the classic ultimatum "Its either me, or the game"
He's either gonna come crawling, or turn round on his chair and keep playing

Or just do this, hope it helped

 

[ebonyspiral]

First of all, he is very lucky to have someone who cares about him, and who recognises he has a potential problem, rather than just calling him a dick and walking away.

I personally wouldn't give him an ultimatum outright; not yet anyway. That's more likely to get him defensive and resentful, and withdraw into gaming. You don't want to seem like you're trying to take his toys away, but rather help him to prevent losing control over part of his life. Talking to him like a partner, who in fact misses him when he spends less time with her, rather than a mother figure who is putting her foot down; that always seems to evoke stroppy teenager-ness.

That said, I would get him to stop WOW as soon as possible though. Even putting a limit on his playing time (which I think is a good compromise with any other gaming, and which he should recognise is for his own sake as well as your relationship) is not something which will come easy with WOW. Nip it in the bud with that game.

Does he acknowledge he has had a problem in the past? If not then it will be much more difficult.

 

[JUMBO PALACE]

Honestly if a person develops a game addiction it's just sad and pathetic.

OT: Did you try talking to him about it? Telling him you have concerns? I would say talking it out would be your best option. Tell him you're worried and feel like he is hurting himself in the long run. Assure him that you care about him (you obviously do very much) and only want to help him. Then after the talk, fuck his brains out so he knows what he's missing when he's leveling his night elf hunter named leagolus.

 

[Yureina]

Looked everywhere for a gaming addiction forum and they don't seem to exist, so you guys are my last hope
My boyfriend's had a gaming addiction in the past, his family have told me he used to spend around 18hrs a day gaming, I tolerate him playing games for a couple of hours a day otherwise he literally gets withdrawal symptoms.
When he bought WoW I was worried because I'd heard about it being extremely addictive and it turns out I was right to be worried I would say he spends 4-5, a day, sometimes more, playing WoW and when he's not playing it he just goes on about how much he wants to play.
I know 4-5 hours isn't anything too serious yet but he does have a past history of game addiction, so am I over reacting or not? If not what do I do?
Any response greatly appreciated

It sounds like there is something else going on here. As someone who once had something of an addiction to WoW, I can tell you that the game itself is not so much the addictive quality as it is a place where a person who has emptiness in their life can fill a void. In other words, he is missing something in his life that he is not getting in another way. The game itself, or any other game for that matter, is not the real problem here. There is something deeper within him that leads him to find solace and comfort within an online gaming world.

You obviously know him better than any of us, but if I had to give any sort of advice, it would be to try to figure out just what is driving him to play as much as he is. Trying to give him "ultimatums" or force him to do things just because you want it to is probably going to end in an ugly fashion, and especially so if he feels as if a game is an escape. What you really want to do is to find a way into his mind and try to overcome it from within.

We can talk about this more in PM's too if you wish. Hope this helped though.
- Rei

 

[minimacker]

Anyone got reminded of the Ctrl + Alt + Del comic? Where Lilah helps cure the Everquest addiction? No?
Damn it.

 

[Talshere]

Anyone got reminded of the Ctrl + Alt + Del comic? Where Lilah helps cure the Everquest addiction? No?
Damn it.

Yeah. Is it bad I remember that? Does this make me a nerd?