Ideal partner: Smarter, dumber, or about on your level?
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dont matter as long as she games lol was with this one chick, bored, and asked her if she wanted to play some halo or something. She just gave me this DUMB look like omg you want me to pick up a video game controller. Needless to say the relationship didnt last much longer lol. On the other hand tho i cant have to much smarter. I dont feel like feeling like i retard if i dont know/care about something shes talking about
I think we need to bring in a distinction between street-smarts and academic smarts here (or common sense or nous or whatever). Because if a girl was academically smarter than me, that would bore me to death as she rambled on about all these things that don't really matter in ways that very few people actually care about. I would hate that. But street-smarts? That's hot. But too much and she might seem a little too 'experienced'. Unfortunately/fortunately I'm with a girl who's smart but not smarter than me. She has zero street-smarts but she's loyal and faithful so fuck it, I'm sticking with her.
Ideally a girl will have a healthy sense of curiosity and a drive to learn about things she doesn't understand. That would make life interesting.
Ideally a girl will have a healthy sense of curiosity and a drive to learn about things she doesn't understand. That would make life interesting.
Im sorry butDeadSp8s said:
I quote:
Defuse or Diffuse?
Defuse literally means "to remove the fuse." It has come to mean generally "to disarm" or "pacify."
Diffuse is normally used as an adjective meaning "spread out," "extended," or "verbose." As a verb it means "to spread out in all directions."
Incorrect: Diffusing Family Arguments
(A title. Spreading them out?)
Correct: Defusing Family Arguments
(Ah! Unfortunately, the first example is a published title.)
Sauce: http://englishplus.com/grammar/00000273.htm
Preferably my intelligence or higher, but I will accept any who can carry on an intelligent conversation about any type of science and/or science fiction and who doesn't mention the tabloids every other paragraph.
My last girlfriend was smarter than me on some levels, if not all. But she still had other insecurities and weaknesses, creating a good balance in the relationship. Also, she wasn't so much smarter than me that it was on a completely different level, which I probably would have considered very annoying.
I'm a mutualist. I prefer when what both can give to each other, is about equivalent. I consider people who prefer partners who are "better than them" as shortsighted and greedy. Shortsighted, because if someone else can do more for you, than you can do for them, then this also means (hello mirror), that you can do less for them, than they can do for you - thus, you're less attractive to them, than they are attractive to you.
This "what someone can contribute" however to me doesn't need to be about the same "field". Sure, if possible i prefer that we're equally good at everything, but that doesn't happen so often, and thus "i'm good at this, you're good at that" is okay to me too, as long as the discrepancies aren't too high and many.
This "what someone can contribute" however to me doesn't need to be about the same "field". Sure, if possible i prefer that we're equally good at everything, but that doesn't happen so often, and thus "i'm good at this, you're good at that" is okay to me too, as long as the discrepancies aren't too high and many.
I like girls to be a bit, but not a hell of a lot smarter than myself.
And another thing... Smarter can be in stuff like science and physics etc, but also in the field of psychology and philosophy.
I don't care a lot about physics and science so when i say i like a smarter girl i mean one who can pose interesting questions about moral and such and who can also have made some interesting thoughts around it that i personally wouldn't have come up with.
And another thing... Smarter can be in stuff like science and physics etc, but also in the field of psychology and philosophy.
I don't care a lot about physics and science so when i say i like a smarter girl i mean one who can pose interesting questions about moral and such and who can also have made some interesting thoughts around it that i personally wouldn't have come up with.
I couldn't even consider having a relationship with a woman who didn't have a decent uni education, a professional career or similarly devoted pursuit, and a decent knowledge of literature/theatre. Even for a brief fling or a one-nighter, I get turned right off if they start coming across as unintelligent. I also exclude anyone who is just rabidly anti-intellectual, or doesn't see the value of literature and artistic film/theatre. I know that kind of thing shouldn't matter for a trivial fling, but I just can't help getting turned off in that situation.
As for same as / smarter than myself - I tend to find that people of a decent intellect/education have different strengths. It's not as important in a fling, but for a serious relationship I'd struggle to stay interested in someone if there wasn't ANYTHING that they were superior in intellectually.
My wife is a good case in point - I've come mainly from a humanities background, when I was a teenager I was decent enough at maths/physics to always top the school, but I haven't touched that stuff since highschool. Since then, I've been humanities-oriented - did degrees in law, philosophy and marketing, spent a couple of years as a stage actor, then a few working as a lawyer before going back to get my PhD and publish/lecture in philosophy, so I haven't really had to touch sciences for a long time. My wife, by comparison, did mathematics/engineering, works as an engineer, and its her turn to do her PhD (in maths) next (financially, it was just easier for us to alternate getting our PhDs and getting established in academia while the other one still pulls a professional income) . I find that a good match - we're both interested enough in each others' areas to get a moderate understanding of them, but still have areas where one of us is better at than the other - I just find it helps maintain that sense of 'wow, you're awesome' that you get early in a relationship.
As for same as / smarter than myself - I tend to find that people of a decent intellect/education have different strengths. It's not as important in a fling, but for a serious relationship I'd struggle to stay interested in someone if there wasn't ANYTHING that they were superior in intellectually.
My wife is a good case in point - I've come mainly from a humanities background, when I was a teenager I was decent enough at maths/physics to always top the school, but I haven't touched that stuff since highschool. Since then, I've been humanities-oriented - did degrees in law, philosophy and marketing, spent a couple of years as a stage actor, then a few working as a lawyer before going back to get my PhD and publish/lecture in philosophy, so I haven't really had to touch sciences for a long time. My wife, by comparison, did mathematics/engineering, works as an engineer, and its her turn to do her PhD (in maths) next (financially, it was just easier for us to alternate getting our PhDs and getting established in academia while the other one still pulls a professional income) . I find that a good match - we're both interested enough in each others' areas to get a moderate understanding of them, but still have areas where one of us is better at than the other - I just find it helps maintain that sense of 'wow, you're awesome' that you get early in a relationship.
Excellent point! Lol.DonSolo said:
I do agree also about having a partner who is on your level. However sometimes it's nice for their knowledge and interlect to be from a different area to your own (if you're sciency they're more artsy etc) cos you can have some great conversations with two different stand points and also it keeps things interesting as you can learn from each other.
Also, I find the smarter a bloke, the less hyper-masculine they are so it's more likely to be a mutual relationship.
Neither. In the past maybe I looked for people with a higher intelligence, however I have since learned that being intelligent or unintelligent isn't essential to maintaning a relationship. What matters is empathy and team work. Neither of which requires an intelligence stat.
That would depend on whether the smarter person would leave me because they can't have an intelligent conversation with me, or the dumber person would leave me because they feel intimidated.
I'd definitely need to go for around my level, if not smarter. Of course, it gets really hard when you're already above the norm to find someone smarter than you are.