If You Were a Themed Serial Killer
- Thread starter The Funslinger
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If I were a serial killer, I'd strip those stickers from the ball caps of my victims and stuff them in their throats along with a note. Should've got a real hat, skippy...
they would call me the Questioner.
I would capture people who are complete turds in life, bosses criminals etc and ask them various questions and if they get it wrong i would either kill them by
1. Dump acid on them
2. cutting there legs and 1 arm having them suffer
3. strangle them with wii motes
4. brand 200 letters on there bodies
5. force them to listen to rebbecca black and place a gun next to them'
6. put a mask on them which would inject 100 nails into there heads
and the last two persons who survive will have to fight each other with chain saws
I would capture people who are complete turds in life, bosses criminals etc and ask them various questions and if they get it wrong i would either kill them by
1. Dump acid on them
2. cutting there legs and 1 arm having them suffer
3. strangle them with wii motes
4. brand 200 letters on there bodies
5. force them to listen to rebbecca black and place a gun next to them'
6. put a mask on them which would inject 100 nails into there heads
and the last two persons who survive will have to fight each other with chain saws
I don't know what I'd call myself, but I'd want to throw darts at people to kill them. I don't know why... It's just a longing I have.
I shoot random people in the head with a shotgun and leave notes like "1 less zombie, you're welcome."
I'd call myself OPERA
Victims would be Single Male 30-50, with no real tangential connections between them.
I'd do the actually dirty deed painlessly and fast, to avoid disgusting myself or causing the blood to coagulate.
I would then rearrange their parts around their house/apartment in a tasteful, avant garde art display. Each room would be wired with an wireless sensor, each linked to a mini mp3 player. Each player would have a clip of a specific Opera piece, like something from Der Freischutz. As the police, or whoever stumbles upon the victim would wander through the house, each room becomes like an exhibit, until they reach the final room where the music reaches it crescendo and the last, most important piece is displayed. No shocking heads in fridges. No grotesque campyness. Just good tasteful sculpture and mixed media displays, like a Blood Eagle over the bed, with the other parts arranged tastefully as to be both disgusting and yet dignified.
Since the blood won't have coagulated, it will pour readily and be sloshed all over the floor, in wet puddles. Heads arranged as mighty busts shall gush with their passions, through their eyes, mouths, and necks. The blood eagle will be drenched as to give off the impression of the wings of a mighty bird as it braves the rain. All the ugly parts I can't work with will be thrown in a Coleman ice chest labeled "junk" and left behind in the fridge.
So yeah...
I'd watch a BS documentary about it if I were me.
Better than Dexter anyway.
At least I'd have class and some good taste.
Victims would be Single Male 30-50, with no real tangential connections between them.
I'd do the actually dirty deed painlessly and fast, to avoid disgusting myself or causing the blood to coagulate.
I would then rearrange their parts around their house/apartment in a tasteful, avant garde art display. Each room would be wired with an wireless sensor, each linked to a mini mp3 player. Each player would have a clip of a specific Opera piece, like something from Der Freischutz. As the police, or whoever stumbles upon the victim would wander through the house, each room becomes like an exhibit, until they reach the final room where the music reaches it crescendo and the last, most important piece is displayed. No shocking heads in fridges. No grotesque campyness. Just good tasteful sculpture and mixed media displays, like a Blood Eagle over the bed, with the other parts arranged tastefully as to be both disgusting and yet dignified.
Since the blood won't have coagulated, it will pour readily and be sloshed all over the floor, in wet puddles. Heads arranged as mighty busts shall gush with their passions, through their eyes, mouths, and necks. The blood eagle will be drenched as to give off the impression of the wings of a mighty bird as it braves the rain. All the ugly parts I can't work with will be thrown in a Coleman ice chest labeled "junk" and left behind in the fridge.
So yeah...
I'd watch a BS documentary about it if I were me.
Better than Dexter anyway.
At least I'd have class and some good taste.
The Counter, the deaths would all happen at the same time once a week and a number would be carved onto their chest and hand saying which victim number they were. So something like someone dieing every Saturday at 6 p.m. or something along those lines.
The Flood, every victim would die from drowning/ suffocation and be found with their face down in water, weather it be a lake, a tub, or a sink.
The Crawling sting, each victim would be killed by a swarm of deadly Insects, Arachnids and such such as African Bees and deadly Scorpions.
The line cutter cutter, I would chop the heads off of everyone who goes in front of people in line without their permission.
The Rester, all victims would be killed by forced drug over dose of drugs meant to relax or help people sleep better and their bodies would be found in their bed or some other comfortable position.
The Cleanser, all victims would've committed a major heinous act such as Murder or Rape, and they would all be killed by have large amounts of toxic/ poisonous cleaning fluid put into their drinks and clean water supply.
The Flood, every victim would die from drowning/ suffocation and be found with their face down in water, weather it be a lake, a tub, or a sink.
The Crawling sting, each victim would be killed by a swarm of deadly Insects, Arachnids and such such as African Bees and deadly Scorpions.
The line cutter cutter, I would chop the heads off of everyone who goes in front of people in line without their permission.
The Rester, all victims would be killed by forced drug over dose of drugs meant to relax or help people sleep better and their bodies would be found in their bed or some other comfortable position.
The Cleanser, all victims would've committed a major heinous act such as Murder or Rape, and they would all be killed by have large amounts of toxic/ poisonous cleaning fluid put into their drinks and clean water supply.
The Trapper!
I will dig huge holed in the street and cover them with a tarp.
What... Never said I had to be a good killer.
I will dig huge holed in the street and cover them with a tarp.
What... Never said I had to be a good killer.
I would kill a person in an ironic way, based on their most prevalant personality flaw, for example, a rascist would be suffocated by a KKK mask and a nazi would be stabbed by a suriken shaped like a swastika
I'd target criminals. I'd make it more interesting by taking their cell phone and if they have Facebook or Twitter, change their status/make a tweet referencing the time and place, i.e. "LOL just got my head exploded in Central Park"
Or leave a sticky note with "I AM DISAPPOINT." on their backs.
Or leave a sticky note with "I AM DISAPPOINT." on their backs.
I'd be Mr. Pointy. Because I love pointy things. I especially love putting pointy things into people.
Mine would be a simple MO, tie them down, start on their legs, slice in a long cut, place thermite on the wound and light it, then move onto the arms and do the same thing, finally one small amount on their chest to burn out their heart, needless to say, the victim would be awake but gagged for the majority of this.
As an alternative, just kill them with home-made cyanide.
As an alternative, just kill them with home-made cyanide.
I'd rip off ZP and go with the "Press X to not die" motif. Or if I were feeling more creative I'd experiment with a nailgun.