If You Were Admin of the Entire Internet ...
- Thread starter The Virgo
- Start date
1. Intelligent discourse shall be allowed at all times.
2. People attempting to stifle other views through condescension, insults, or legal action shall themselves be stifled.
3. I shall implement a mandatory age gate which uses a national registry of bank account numbers and birthdates to restrict those younger than 18 to the kiddie pool.
4. Opinions I disagree with, things I don't like, and people who annoy me are vindictively banned so I don't have to respond intelligently to their arguments.
...what?
2. People attempting to stifle other views through condescension, insults, or legal action shall themselves be stifled.
3. I shall implement a mandatory age gate which uses a national registry of bank account numbers and birthdates to restrict those younger than 18 to the kiddie pool.
4. Opinions I disagree with, things I don't like, and people who annoy me are vindictively banned so I don't have to respond intelligently to their arguments.
...what?
im just gonna go ahead and say it.. FREE PORN!!! free porn for anyone who wants it. It would be fun to randomly change addresses so you put in say Google to your search bar and get redirected to the playboy web site or some other grossly inappropriate site. THAT could amuse me!
I would ban everyone in my village so that I could (hopefully) get a decent internet speed for once :L
I would press the kill switch and end the entire internet. Just because I want to see what would happen to the world.
Fox. Fox would BURN. Online accounts, New's website. They shouldn't be so powerful, but they are.
To start, time to take revenge on all the sites which have banned me - by permabanning the admins + mods, and adding a big banner announcing their humiliation. Then I'd shut down Something Awful, permanently. 
After that, it's high time something was done about Facebook. The current administration would lose all control. No place for Zynga games or any other stupid social gaming. They will be replaced by flash versions of classic games such as Legend of Zelda, Final Fantasy, and Mario. And I WILL shove them down the throats of Farmville players just like they funnel-feed foie gras. Hahaahahaha!
Wikipedia will also feel my wrath. The rule on original research will be deleted, and all vested political interests will be wiped off the map. I will also turn the Illuminati article into a factual account of their existence. Yes, definitely a power grab on the flow of information.
Origin shall also be shut down permanently, but not without updating EA games to be free of always-online DRM restrictions.
After that, it's high time something was done about Facebook. The current administration would lose all control. No place for Zynga games or any other stupid social gaming. They will be replaced by flash versions of classic games such as Legend of Zelda, Final Fantasy, and Mario. And I WILL shove them down the throats of Farmville players just like they funnel-feed foie gras. Hahaahahaha!
Wikipedia will also feel my wrath. The rule on original research will be deleted, and all vested political interests will be wiped off the map. I will also turn the Illuminati article into a factual account of their existence. Yes, definitely a power grab on the flow of information.
Origin shall also be shut down permanently, but not without updating EA games to be free of always-online DRM restrictions.
OF COURSE!Hawk of Battle said:
OT: I would ban everyone I didn't like, I would give myself all the steam games I wanted, I would destroy ={eGO}= (yes that is a real clan, it's for most source games). Then...I would repopulate any dead source mods.
Then I would probably go mad from power.
Since I wouldn't care enough about the rest of the internet to do much on my own, I'd start accepting bids from other people who would like me to do stuff on their behalf. I'd be an Admin For Hire.
(Rubs hands together and cackles) Let's see...
1- Find pedos, trolls, and the like and ban the crap out of them (and maybe give the police a few addresses for certain individuals...
2- Stop flame wars, also keep crazy bronies offline.
3- Make sure big businesses can't screw with video viewing sites, then let SFDebris, Megami33 and Dragonball Z Abridged back on Youtube after being forced off the site.
Um... that's all I got so far...
1- Find pedos, trolls, and the like and ban the crap out of them (and maybe give the police a few addresses for certain individuals...
2- Stop flame wars, also keep crazy bronies offline.
3- Make sure big businesses can't screw with video viewing sites, then let SFDebris, Megami33 and Dragonball Z Abridged back on Youtube after being forced off the site.
Um... that's all I got so far...
When i read this i get the hilarious image of a gay jewish man attending a nazi meeting, and then standing up halfway to say "GODDAMIT I HATE THE NAZIS >:C" before sitting back down and listening to what they have to say.Alkaline said:
Why would he even go to that meeting? Why go and do that? Isnt that kinda weird? If he ahtes the group, the people there, the way it looks ect, Why would he attend their rallies? Also godwins, yeah, its a similie in which you were actually compared to the non evil person for a change.
Just seems weird to have a presence in a place full of people you hate in a visually disgusting slow place? Apparently anyway. Not saying you have to leave because you hate it but you gotta wonder why... There is no compulsion to be here, you yourself said there is no logical reason to like this site. Is visiting it some sort of masochistic thrill
im just wondering.I like this site. Im not sure why to be fair, its the only forum ive ever been on properly and ive grown to like it. The people can be hilarious at times, i had an arguement over the existance of ghosts entirely in poetry the other day. I think theres some real gems of users here, and sticking around to talk to them is worth the while. Have a nice day, im sorry you got that impression of us.
EDIT: I got a chuckle at the irony of you saying "EVERYONE HERE IS STUPID AND SMUG!" No implications to you but its a little funny declaring how you are better than the userbase here and then accusing them of being smug
Well in a nutshell I know you'd all be royally fucked. But lets see.
First, hunt down pedophile sites and give the info to the government covertly allowing them to be taken down from behind the scenes (Seriously you don't just go openly reporting that stuff, horrible things can happen to children being abused) This is priority number one.
Then Rejoice that the power of the internet is in MY hands and not the governments so I can kick all this SOPA shit out on it's rear end. I'm perfectly all for stamping down on piracy but that is NOT the way to do it. Companies do not need more money than they already get, give fair payment to the creators of this media and there would be no problem, people benefit from sharing of visual media both creatively and innovatively.
Make life difficult for illegal torrent sources. (Not sites, Sources) It would be painstakingly difficult but there's a fine line between blaming the tool and blaming the person using the tool. Take away the things the tool is applied to? Tool becomes useless. Or at least focused on what it is meant to which is legal file exchanges. Seriously I'm all for free media sharing but getting free copies of pokemeon black and an emulator is not helping you to create anything wildly groundbreaking, learn to use rpg maker then we'll talk. People sink big money into the things they love to do, why should you be the special bumblebee who gets to do it all free of charge. True I do think companies should readily promote and support the learning and picking apart of some of their creations a bit more, because all this protection bs is ensuring that no one but the dumb and privileged get to. THAT is what has to change.
I'm not being Hypocritical, the last time I torrented anything was years ago and I've found I just don't need/want to. So I'm behind on most major television shows and I have to run Photoshop 7 key I got from school years and years ago. Big fucking woop. It's not going to end your career as a media guru, try going outside and listening to some music in bars, or some public events. Meet people who can help you out in those departments.
Okay errr. Moving on. Whiny teens/adults/kids who impose on others too much with their bullshit earn themselves temporary Bannage from the internet. This has to be pretty severe whinging and will only get them banned for 3 days, but I feel like people need a rest to recover from attention whores like that.
Roll Back the Escapist. (Seriously guys I dread coming here now. Sort it. On my laptop the font looks like a messed up soup of stretched lines and awfulness...)
I think I will make the GAG Quartet - Le Internet Medley, the theme of the internet... It just seems right. It's a mush of all the original silly things to come off the internet, perfect.
First, hunt down pedophile sites and give the info to the government covertly allowing them to be taken down from behind the scenes (Seriously you don't just go openly reporting that stuff, horrible things can happen to children being abused) This is priority number one.
Then Rejoice that the power of the internet is in MY hands and not the governments so I can kick all this SOPA shit out on it's rear end. I'm perfectly all for stamping down on piracy but that is NOT the way to do it. Companies do not need more money than they already get, give fair payment to the creators of this media and there would be no problem, people benefit from sharing of visual media both creatively and innovatively.
Make life difficult for illegal torrent sources. (Not sites, Sources) It would be painstakingly difficult but there's a fine line between blaming the tool and blaming the person using the tool. Take away the things the tool is applied to? Tool becomes useless. Or at least focused on what it is meant to which is legal file exchanges. Seriously I'm all for free media sharing but getting free copies of pokemeon black and an emulator is not helping you to create anything wildly groundbreaking, learn to use rpg maker then we'll talk. People sink big money into the things they love to do, why should you be the special bumblebee who gets to do it all free of charge. True I do think companies should readily promote and support the learning and picking apart of some of their creations a bit more, because all this protection bs is ensuring that no one but the dumb and privileged get to. THAT is what has to change.
I'm not being Hypocritical, the last time I torrented anything was years ago and I've found I just don't need/want to. So I'm behind on most major television shows and I have to run Photoshop 7 key I got from school years and years ago. Big fucking woop. It's not going to end your career as a media guru, try going outside and listening to some music in bars, or some public events. Meet people who can help you out in those departments.
Okay errr. Moving on. Whiny teens/adults/kids who impose on others too much with their bullshit earn themselves temporary Bannage from the internet. This has to be pretty severe whinging and will only get them banned for 3 days, but I feel like people need a rest to recover from attention whores like that.
Roll Back the Escapist. (Seriously guys I dread coming here now. Sort it. On my laptop the font looks like a messed up soup of stretched lines and awfulness...)
I think I will make the GAG Quartet - Le Internet Medley, the theme of the internet... It just seems right. It's a mush of all the original silly things to come off the internet, perfect.
You know, replace some words in your post and the post you replied to, and it'd be called "racism".The Virgo said:
Plus, ignoring facts in order to instill your own narrow viewpoints on a culture you obviously have issues with...
I believe that can be called a dictatorship.
More OT, just for the hell of it, I'd do the following (if we pretend it'd be physically possible):
A) Find everyone that pirated anything ever and charge them the price of whatever they pirated plus 10% interest (10% for each item, not 10% of the total).
B) Make sure that each individual website is supporting their own rules and regulations and not abusing any "power", as much as you could call authority on an internet forum "power" (no offense to the moderators here, I'm hoping you know what I mean).
C) Find and persecute any child porn creator/downloader to the fullest extent of the law.
D) Make sure the internet is safe from SOPA or anything like it.
E) If my power extends to games played over the internet, make it so consoles and PCs and Macs and Linux-based computers can all play whatever games that are cross platform together. I'd also make sure that EVERY game had a "mute this player" option for those less-than-tolerable players
Everything else would remain the same. Freedom of speech, motherfuckers. Just remember, you're free to say what you want, but others are free to disagree and think you're an idiot/asshole for it. It's the wonderful thing about individuality.
Oh... wait, one more:
F) I would make it possible for people to have NetNavis like in the old Megaman Battle Network games, and you could explore certain websites that way. Wouldn't that just be awesome?
It's funny that you joined the site in March 2011, and have the "watched 100 ZP videos" badge, yet claim it stopped being funny a long time ago.Alkaline said:
Were you forced to watch 100 of them in 9 months?
Just curious! No disrespect meant or anything. I mean you might have been lurking long before then, but then if you think they were past their best a long time ago, your badges seem to suggest you've kept watching.